Is it wrong for me not to make it to my brothers wedding?

funboy6942

Lifer
Nov 13, 2001
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416
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My brother for the third time is getting married. He lives in LA CA and I live in Indiana. I am also disabled and have gained alot of weight. Before I gained all the weight I was still a wide big boned fella and could barly fit into the plane seats without great pain from being squished between the arm rests.

I told my brother that I wont be able to come because of my disabilitly I cant get around and he wants to drag me everywhere. I also told him that because I got fat since getting hurt that the only way I can fly is f I did first class and hello I am disabled and on welfair no chance in hell would I be able to afford the ticket. Along with this he said for me to drive and yet again my back will not take a 2400 mile drive, each way, and I most likly will not be able to afford the gas either.

Ontop of all this my wife will need to work and that leaves no one to watch the kids and if she takes the days off we would be screwed because her check is our only source of income. Now my brother is super pissed because I cant make it and will not talk to me. Am I in the wrong here? He knows I am suffering from a back injury that will be for the rest of my life. He did offer to pay for the plane ticket but misses the point that I cannot walk and I will be damned if I am just going to go there to sit in the hotel or his house. I feel like crap now because I cant go beause of my disability but he is pissing me off because he wont uinderstand and I get the feeling he thinks I am ok and I am blowing him off.

What did I do wrong, can do to fix it, or is he just going to have to grow up? BTW he is 36.
 

FoBoT

No Lifer
Apr 30, 2001
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fobot.com
he is overreacting/acting like a baby

you guys are old enough to realize real life is what it is. (i.e. you coming is a problem, you aren't not coming to spite him, it just can't be done right now)

he'll (hopefully) get over it
 

Ime

Diamond Member
May 3, 2001
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He needs to grow up, it seems. Family should be more understanding.
 

SouthPaW1227

Golden Member
Aug 4, 2004
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He needs to get over it, and stop being *selfish*. Wish him the best & get lots of pics...everyone can't always attend everything.
 

Kadarin

Lifer
Nov 23, 2001
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Your situation sounds like it would be a real hardship to go to his (third) wedding, and he seems to not understand nor care about that. You could tell him you'll try to be there for his fourth or fifth...
 

funboy6942

Lifer
Nov 13, 2001
15,362
416
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Not only this has me upset but 5 years ago when we got married I worked our marrage around the time he was going to be in town. I asked nothing from him but wedding photos to be taken by him (he is a proffessional photographer). He never stayed for the entire party afterwards (Had my friends band play for free at a bar for us and I was singing some of the songs). He said he had to leave because him and his girlfriend at the time wanted to go site seeing and was going to wake up early. So the only person from my side of the family (because the parents are dead) leaves my wedding party early (like 9 pm).

I bitched at him where he said to me about his wedding "Oh I see how it is" and I threw all that in his face how I worked my wedding around the time he was in town to save him money, he left early, and then I have still YET to recieve my wedding photos!

I am so mad right now. And you all are right he needs to grow up and stop being so damn selfish but he is not.
 

Zeeky Boogy Doog

Platinum Member
Mar 31, 2004
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Originally posted by: funboy42
Not only this has me upset but 5 years ago when we got married I worked our marrage around the time he was going to be in town. I asked nothing from him but wedding photos to be taken by him (he is a proffessional photographer). He never stayed for the entire party afterwards (Had my friends band play for free at a bar for us and I was singing some of the songs). He said he had to leave because him and his girlfriend at the time wanted to go site seeing and was going to wake up early. So the only person from my side of the family (because the parents are dead) leaves my wedding party early (like 9 pm).

I bitched at him where he said to me about his wedding "Oh I see how it is" and I threw all that in his face how I worked my wedding around the time he was in town to save him money, he left early, and then I have still YET to recieve my wedding photos!

I am so mad right now. And you all are right he needs to grow up and stop being so damn selfish but he is not.

damn... no wedding photos yet and it was 5 years ago? i'd of been bitching a long time ago if i were you. i also suspect that he and his gf left to see eachother's sites, not around town.... i'd be quite pissed if i were you, he has no reason to be.