Is it offensive to ask someone if they are gay?

chiwawa626

Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
12,013
0
0
A. Is it offensive to ask someone if they are gay, if they are fine with gays and think they should have the same rights as everyone else? Or better yet, should they take offense if you ask if they are gay?
B. Is it offensive to ask someone if they are gay, if they dont like gays?
 

Cosmickarma

Banned
Feb 26, 2002
168
0
0


<< A. Is it offensive to ask someone if they are gay, if they are fine with gays and think they should have the same rights as everyone else? Or better yet, should they take offense if you ask if they are gay? >>



50 years from now maybe not..as of now...YES!!!!!!!!!!
 

b0mbrman

Lifer
Jun 1, 2001
29,470
1
81
Ask them. You can't lose

If they say "No" then you can tell them that they must be really insecure about their sexuality to say "No" and therefore, they're a closet gay.
 

Zim Hosein

Super Moderator | Elite Member
Super Moderator
Nov 27, 1999
65,402
407
126


<< Not offensive...but not something you should do >>


Unless you are interested in the person be it a man or woman, I agree w/ b0mbrman, just my opinion.
 

Cosmickarma

Banned
Feb 26, 2002
168
0
0


<< In a few years you'll wonder why you asked this question at all... >>



what you Andy Warhol or something?





<< If they say "No" then you can tell them that they must be really insecure about their sexuality to say "No" and therefore, they're a closet gay. >>



ROFL
 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
27,112
930
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I was in a casino several years ago and this guy next to me at the blackjack table seemed to be way more interested in me than I was comfortable with. He started off as a normal type guy, just chatting about news, weather, sports and that kind of thing. I noticed that as the night wore on, he began speaking in a more feminine voice and began inching his chair closer to me. I was wearing kaki shorts and began to notice what felt like leg rubbing. It was short the first time, so I dismissed it as just accidental, but soon it became more intense and intentional. Finally, I just looked at the guy and asked are you gay? He confirmed it. I said, ok, let's make one thing understood here; I'm hetero, married, and very happy. Understood? He said, yeah, no problem. About 5 more minutes passed and he started telling me he liked my voice, and then that damn leg rubbing stared again. I said, look, jerk! I've asked you and you agreed to stop. Now stop damnit!

He then goes into this spiel about how he used to be married and was no longer, and about how lonly he is and that everyone deep inside has a desire to have what he called, a homosexual experience with no ties, just pleasure. I said, you're entitled to believe what you want, but I'm not playing. A few more minutes passed, and he began to rub my inner thight. I friggin lost it. The dealer had been watching, and probably read my mind, because just as I was getting ready to elbo jam this freak, she looked at me and nodded. I knocked that bastard on his ass, then pinned him on the floor and head butted him. I got dragged one way by security and he got taken another. I was not kicked out of the casino, as I had the dealer as my witness, as well as surveilance saw the whole thing. :Q
 
Jul 1, 2000
10,274
2
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Depends on the bathhouse you're in at the time.

Seriously, unless you are looking to pick up the guy, why do you really care what he does with hus genitals?
 

bonk102

Diamond Member
Oct 23, 2000
5,473
2
0
depends, if he's gay he might not take offense, if he's not, he probably will

for instance if someone asked me if i was gay i would take offense
 

chiwawa626

Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
12,013
0
0
no im not gay and i dont wanna pickup guys, i was just asking to see what u guys thought about things like that after i overheard an ugly conversation..
 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
27,112
930
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What I posted above has not been my only encounter. I have had several, probably more than my fair share. I do not dislike them because they are gay, but because of what they do. I realize they're not all like that, but when I sense it, I ask. And my next statement is usually, get the f*** away from me. Take your trip elsewhere. I'm not a homophobe, as I don't fear them, but they damn well better leave me alone when I ask them to. :|
 

777joee

Golden Member
Jun 19, 2001
1,109
0
0


<< A. Is it offensive to ask someone if they are gay, if they are fine with gays and think they should have the same rights as everyone else? Or better yet, should they take offense if you ask if they are gay?
B. Is it offensive to ask someone if they are gay, if they dont like gays?
>>



Almost like asking if it was the chicken or egg that was first.

Why do you need to know? It will come out in good time if you realy spend a lot of time with the person.

Just my $.02
 
Jul 1, 2000
10,274
2
0
It is better not to ask unless you really want or need to know. Those situations are few.

Many make their sexulaity patently obvious... wait about 15 minutes and the truth will usually reveal itself.
 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
27,112
930
126


<< I'd be pretty upset if someone seriously asked me if i was gay >>



I'd have to have pretty good cause to ask, as demonstrated above.
Of course, by then, I have little doubt, nor reason to ask. :)
 

luv2chill

Diamond Member
Feb 22, 2000
4,611
0
76


<< I was in a casino several years ago and this guy next to me at the blackjack table seemed to be way more interested in me than I was comfortable with. He started off as a normal type guy, just chatting about news, weather, sports and that kind of thing. I noticed that as the night wore on, he began speaking in a more feminine voice and began inching his chair closer to me. I was wearing kaki shorts and began to notice what felt like leg rubbing. It was short the first time, so I dismissed it as just accidental, but soon it became more intense and intentional. Finally, I just looked at the guy and asked are you gay? He confirmed it. I said, ok, let's make one thing understood here; I'm hetero, married, and very happy. Understood? He said, yeah, no problem. About 5 more minutes passed and he started telling me he liked my voice, and then that damn leg rubbing stared again. I said, look, jerk! I've asked you and you agreed to stop. Now stop damnit!

He then goes into this spiel about how he used to be married and was no longer, and about how lonly he is and that everyone deep inside has a desire to have what he called, a homosexual experience with no ties, just pleasure. I said, you're entitled to believe what you want, but I'm not playing. A few more minutes passed, and he began to rub my inner thight. I friggin lost it. The dealer had been watching, and probably read my mind, because just as I was getting ready to elbo jam this freak, she looked at me and nodded. I knocked that bastard on his ass, then pinned him on the floor and head butted him. I got dragged one way by security and he got taken another. I was not kicked out of the casino, as I had the dealer as my witness, as well as surveilance saw the whole thing. :Q
>>

What a story...

Sounds like something from a movie script.

l2c
 

tcsenter

Lifer
Sep 7, 2001
18,941
570
126


<< A few more minutes passed, and he began to rub my inner thight. I friggin lost it. The dealer had been watching, and probably read my mind, because just as I was getting ready to elbo jam this freak, she looked at me and nodded. I knocked that bastard on his ass, then pinned him on the floor and head butted him. I got dragged one way by security and he got taken another. >>

hehe, you're not alone. I've found there is nothing more obnoxious and persistent than a drunk i love you. There was a time when I worked with a lot of homos in the restaurant/hotel business, and I was trying to be that '90's tolerant guy' by just treating them like everyone else. I figured, "hey, what the hell they do in their bedrooms is no more my business than vice versa." It didn't take long for me to realize that is nearly impossible to do.

Every time I have ever been hit-on by a i love you and tried to be polite about rejecting him, saying "Sorry, I'm straight" or something like that, the very fact that I did not knock his teeth out seemed to be interpreted as though I was saying "well...maybe". Its almost as if fags EXPECT to get their asses kicked, and will accept nothing less than getting their ass kicked, and if you don't lose your temper or act personally offended, then that means you're not so opposed to the idea that he might actually have a chance with you. I'm not F-ing kidding, this very issue has been written about a number of times within the gay community.

The gay community's largest problem is that its such a severely disfunctional culture, both socially and otherwise, it seems as though they don't want to, or don't know how to, behave in ways that foster mutual respect...and my sister is a lesbian and she is in agreement with me on this 100%. They have no concept of "boundaries" and act as though the world is one big gay bar. Gays worse enemy - by far- in their plight to be accepted within cultural and social 'norms' are gays themselves.