In this age of targeted marketing...

[IronWing]

...how would you target toilet paper to men? Be creative.

 

[mizzou]

nice toilet paper....hemmoroids....outdoor activities/active sports.........NFL network stations/ESPN/Outdoor network

Done

 

[PrinceofWands]

Pictures of neocons and religious whackjobs on the toilet paper. I'll wipe my ass with that all day long. Hell, I'll overeat and take laxatives just to load up for it.

 

[nanette1985]

Pictures of toilets with the toilet seat left up.

And of course the way you market everything else to men: pix of hot semi-clothed babes.

 

[GodlessAstronomer]

Get rid of those faggy sea shells and whatever other shit they print on the TP, replace with prints of titties.

 

[Lonyo]

I would make an episode of Bones focused around toilet paper and how everyone should use this toilet paper as it will get them laid.

 

[shortylickens]

You dont.
Just like most clothing and health care products for men arent directly marketed to men. They are marketed to women, because statistically they buy most of that stuff.

 

[waffleironhead]

Charmin, "For men who dont want to get shit on their fingers."

 

[thepd7]

You dont.
Just like most clothing and health care products for men arent directly marketed to men. They are marketed to women, because statistically they buy most of that stuff.

this. why would you target people who don't actually make the decision on your product?

 

[Zebo]

Naked babes on roll. Course feminizes would have that company shut down. Guess I'd make a commercial with a hot babe caressing her lovely face with it while claiming how soft it is. I mean sex sells always has always will.

 

[Ika]

Pictures of toilets with the toilet seat left up.

And of course the way you market everything else to men: pix of hot semi-clothed babes.

preferably, the "semi-clothed" potion being the TP itself.

 

[rockyct]

this. why would you target people who don't actually make the decision on your product?

Kirk: "Uhh, you're letting me go?!"
Executive: "Kirk, crackers are a family food. Happy families. Maybe single people eat crackers...we don't know. Frankly, we don't want to know. It's a market we can do without."
Kirk: "So, that's it. After 20 years, 'So long, good luck.'?"
Executive: "I don't recall saying 'Good luck.'"

 

[I Saw OJ]

Design TP for the men with hairy asscracks.

 

[lifeobry]

AXE Paper for MEN Red Theory EXX (aka toilet paper)

Attractive and manly male protaganist fights the ever present battle of the empty toilet roll, caused by a narrow non-long-lasting roll of toilet paper. He wins by switching to the thick and robust longer lasting brand X toilet roll. He is surrounded by young attractive women who appreciate his long lasting roll.

Bold for emphasis.

Would air on Spike, Versus, Comedy Central and Lifetime.

 

[JS80]

Pictures of liberals and green whackjobs on the toilet paper. I'll wipe my ass with that all day long. Hell, I'll overeat and take laxatives just to load up for it.

Make it out of rainforest cleared wood and I'll pay extra.

 

[SunSamurai]

Pictures of hotwings and long roadtrips.

Because the only thing you give a flying fuck about when you realize those hotwings were from a phoenix and they are trying to take flight anew via the closest orifice fueled by pure http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capsaicincapsaicin.. is TP.