I'm failing my diet because I can't comply on the weekends

[z1ggy]

I tend to have this thing lately where I end up binging on weekends, feeling guilty then going super low calories during the week... give in to cravings on weekends, rinse and repeat. I've gained about 15lb over the past 3 years due to a bit of lower activity but also I think from switching to a much more stressful job and a few other external things that caused me stress. Working on getting a new job but in the mean time I'm trying to figure out how to lose weight and keep it off. By the time Friday comes around, I spend the weekend just stress eating.

Diet is as follows:

31yo male, roughly 5 foot 9, weight 198 (3yr ago I was about 184)


Then absolute free for all on the weekends. Chinese food, pizza, pretzels, Cold Stone ice cream... just anything and everything, I eat it.


I know the calories above are too low, and my carbs are also probably a little low but with my current mental state and this weekend crap I'm doing, I feel like I have to eat this little or else I'll start gaining. I've been lucky enough to sit around this 197-198 range for about 8 months now with the gym every so often, and my adult hockey games, 1-2x per week. I need to figure a way to keep things more level instead of this yo-yo stuff.

Another annoying thing is I'm trying to only eat chicken, turkey and salmon only, no steak, no pork and I really don't like much other seafood. Personal choice thing.

Has anybody struggled like this? I'm considering maybe going in for a mental health check up. I never struggled like this before... I've bulked and cut at least two times in the past with minimal issue. Just had blood work done, too. No abnormalities.

 

[dasherHampton]

I'm assuming you have no idea how many calories you're actually eating on the weekends.

I've had problems with binge eating at times as well. You know that a small pizza can have like 4000 calories? A milkshake can have over 1000.

I think you need to meal prep for the weekends to stop yourself from going insane calorie-wise.

 

[z1ggy]

Yeah basically no idea on the cals in. It's 100% my fault and my responsibility but I just... don't. Weekdays I don't track per se, because I can somehow be 100% compliant to the above. I've been eating probably around the 1300-1500 cal range since Jan (weekdays).

Meal prep. I will try that for sure. Weekdays I actually make my lunch every morning, fresh and same with dinner.

 

[snoopy7548]

You drink a cup of half and half for breakfast? The heck? Eat some oatmeal, fruit, and nuts.

 

[deadlyapp]

Your problem is in your weekly intake and your negative association with food. Break the cycle of feeling bad about your binge on the weekend, because aggressive dieting during the week isn't going to solve it. Eat an appropriate amount during the week to restrain your cravings on the weekend and if you can't control yourself on the weekend then figure out a way to hold yourself accountable. Sure it's easy to blow out on the weekend but you need to make a conscious decision not to.

Another poster already said it, but the best way to manage your eating on the weekend is to prep on Sunday for Monday - Thursday, then prep again on Thursday to manage through the weekend.

Your eating during the week is a shit show. Get rid of the half and half - switch to something else - almond milk, non-fat milk, honestly anything would be better. Alternatively simply cut back on your coffee - you've probably built up a tolerance to caffeine and now drink so much coffee that you must have a comparable amount of half and half.

Your protein is too low, your fat is too low, and your carb goal is probably reasonable if you aren't very active. If you lift regularly or workout - you need to up it, stat.

You're mentally ruining yourself during the week, you're probably in a state of constant adrenal fatigue due to poor nutrition, and your metabolic engine is probably fucked.

I highly, HIGHLY recommend spending some money and getting a true nutritionist / dietitian to help you out. Usually they want a 3-6 month commitment and will probably cost around the $150/mo range, but for someone like you, you absolutely need it.

 

[whm1974]

Doesn't look like you are consuming enough fat. Not enough fat in the diet will cause overeating from tome to time.

 

[sandorski]

Try to add a Walk or some exercise to your weekend schedule. Also, consciously avoid something on the weekends, like desserts. You might want to treat yourself a little on Wednesday, perhaps have a dessert then. I think changing things up to avoid boredom might do you a world of good.

 

[purbeast0]

When I want to lean up, I typically eat well during the week and then on the weekends I am way more lax and eat out and basically eat whatever I want. It's always worked for me.

There is nothing wrong with binge eating on the weekend and having some cheat meals. It keeps you sane and gives you something to look forward to, and can help you big time during the week if you know you hold out a couple days that you will get that tasty treat.

I never track stuff either. I guess it's just because I've done it before that I know what I have to do. But I do weigh myself every week at the same time, usually Thursday mornings, and see what progress I've made. I'd typically lose like 1-1.5 pounds a week.

This was when I would try to go from like 210 to 200'ish or so. I've been fluctuating between 195-200 recently though so I'm not really trying to lose weight, but I'm still eating my normal 'good' stuff during the week for the most part.

 

[z1ggy]

You drink a cup of half and half for breakfast? The heck? Eat some oatmeal, fruit, and nuts.

It's with my coffee which is around 16oz or something. Yes, that's a lot but I also sleep like crap (for unknown reasons, no caffeine after 12pm) and I actually don't like the taste of black coffee much, go figure. Used to drink sugar free Monster but then I figured that it's probably slowly killing me, so I stopped it (also expensive).

I do intermittent fasting which I feel helps me eat less while trying to diet. I've been doing this consistently for probably the past 4-5 years. Only eat between 12pm-7pm although one could argue that the half and half would be disturbing that fasting, which it probably is to a degree. I have no issues changing that to fat free, but I also am probably addicted to morning coffee... Mentally and physically.

 

[z1ggy]

When I want to lean up, I typically eat well during the week and then on the weekends I am way more lax and eat out and basically eat whatever I want. It's always worked for me.

There is nothing wrong with binge eating on the weekend and having some cheat meals. It keeps you sane and gives you something to look forward to, and can help you big time during the week if you know you hold out a couple days that you will get that tasty treat.

I never track stuff either. I guess it's just because I've done it before that I know what I have to do. But I do weigh myself every week at the same time, usually Thursday mornings, and see what progress I've made. I'd typically lose like 1-1.5 pounds a week.

This was when I would try to go from like 210 to 200'ish or so. I've been fluctuating between 195-200 recently though so I'm not really trying to lose weight, but I'm still eating my normal 'good' stuff during the week for the most part.

I think the problem is if I'm say... -4000 calories from mon-thurs I end up going +4000 on the weekend in total and I'm a wash. I need to figure a way to just lessen the "binging" I do. I agree, you need some kind of "treat" to stop yourself from going nuts but I need to portion control, which I think the meal prepping is a good idea. I usually end up going to the grocery store hungry, buying all sorts of crap and eating too much of it. I'll probably start going food shopping at night after dinner during the week instead.

Ideas for "cheat" meals that are still pretty healthy but offer some level of 'comfort' during diet?

 

[purbeast0]

Just don't keep junk food in your house and you won't eat it. If it's not there, you won't have access to it.

Don't even worry about cheat meals being healthy. Just enjoy whatever you want. In the end it will maybe be what, like a 500 calorie difference? That's not that much in the grand scheme of things if you're doing it once a week. It may take a little longer to hit your goal but at least you won't be miserable.

My personal "healthy" cheat meals would be going to like Chipotle and getting a bowl that is mainly low carb food, like the lettuce, meat, salsa, and cheese. Usually I'll get a little bit of beans and rice too. There is another chain around here that is similar to Chipotle but is Greek food (Cava) that is typically my go to meal when trying to eat somewhat healthy and cheating.

But othertimes, I'll hit up Taco Bell and get like 4 items and go to town lol.

 

[z1ggy]

Just don't keep junk food in your house and you won't eat it. If it's not there, you won't have access to it.

Don't even worry about cheat meals being healthy. Just enjoy whatever you want. In the end it will maybe be what, like a 500 calorie difference? That's not that much in the grand scheme of things if you're doing it once a week. It may take a little longer to hit your goal but at least you won't be miserable.

My personal "healthy" cheat meals would be going to like Chipotle and getting a bowl that is mainly low carb food, like the lettuce, meat, salsa, and cheese. Usually I'll get a little bit of beans and rice too. There is another chain around here that is similar to Chipotle but is Greek food (Cava) that is typically my go to meal when trying to eat somewhat healthy and cheating.

But othertimes, I'll hit up Taco Bell and get like 4 items and go to town lol.

You think I'm okay eating as low as like 1300-1400 during the weak? I've read a few different spots on reddit and elsewhere that going that low is fine provided you "recover" with more food/carbs 1 day a week (maybe more if really lean, which I'm not). Something like you can be in a -22 * lb of body fat, calorie deficit per day and not lose much muscle. I'm about 18-20% body fat so that means I could go -800 cal net per day and be okay.

 

[purbeast0]

I don't know I don't calorie count. To me that seems WWWAAAAYYY low for someone who is just under 200lbs.

If I had to ballpark it, I probably was eating like 2500 calories a day when I was trying to go from 210lbs to 200lbs. I do lift weights regularly, 4x a week though, and have a lot of muscle mass on me so I probably need more than your average person that weight does who is trying to lose weight.

Again, just try something for a week, and weigh yourself before and after. If you are losing weight that you want, then keep it up. If not, eat less. Or exercise more to burn more calories.

 

[deadlyapp]

You think I'm okay eating as low as like 1300-1400 during the weak? I've read a few different spots on reddit and elsewhere that going that low is fine provided you "recover" with more food/carbs 1 day a week (maybe more if really lean, which I'm not). Something like you can be in a -22 * lb of body fat, calorie deficit per day and not lose much muscle. I'm about 18-20% body fat so that means I could go -800 cal net per day and be okay.

There are plenty of good calculators for Resting Metabolism Rate (RMR) to get you an idea of what your body consumes with no exercise at all. At 5'9" and 198 with 20% BF your body probably only needs around 1750-1800 calories a day. For reference, when I was 199lb and 6'0" and 20.7% BF by Dexa Scan, my RMR was 1,824 cal/day. At 185lb and 10.5% BF, it was 1,889 cal/day.

Most guidelines are to have a weekly calorie deficit of around 1500-2000 cal to limit muscle loss (this would be around a half pound a week). If you're trying to cut significantly, then shooting for closer to 3500-4000 cal would yield faster losses.

Right now you're probably about 2000-2500 cal deficit during the week and then blow it all (or worse) on the weekend.

Like I said, incorporate more enjoyable foods with good macro balance into your normal week and see if that helps with your cravings on weekends. Not shopping hungry definitely helps too, as well as not drinking (drinking typically leads to eating worse).

And ignore that bullshit about carb re-feeds and shit. There's no science in that. Cheat days are only a mental thing, not a scientific thing.

 

[z1ggy]

There are plenty of good calculators for Resting Metabolism Rate (RMR) to get you an idea of what your body consumes with no exercise at all. At 5'9" and 198 with 20% BF your body probably only needs around 1750-1800 calories a day. For reference, when I was 199lb and 6'0" and 20.7% BF by Dexa Scan, my RMR was 1,824 cal/day. At 185lb and 10.5% BF, it was 1,889 cal/day.

Most guidelines are to have a weekly calorie deficit of around 1500-2000 cal to limit muscle loss (this would be around a half pound a week). If you're trying to cut significantly, then shooting for closer to 3500-4000 cal would yield faster losses.

Right now you're probably about 2000-2500 cal deficit during the week and then blow it all (or worse) on the weekend.

Like I said, incorporate more enjoyable foods with good macro balance into your normal week and see if that helps with your cravings on weekends. Not shopping hungry definitely helps too, as well as not drinking (drinking typically leads to eating worse).

And ignore that bullshit about carb re-feeds and shit. There's no science in that. Cheat days are only a mental thing, not a scientific thing.

Well, I do play ice hockey 1 or 2 times a week, I figure each game burns around 800-1000 cals, depending on how things go. I've been doing this crappy yo-yo thing fluctuating between like 195-198 for about 8 months so I figure I'm about -3000 to 4000 on weekdays with the ice hockey, and then I undo all of it on the weekends, and some weeks where I don't play hockey enough, gain a bit. I also golf but that burns minimal cals.

I'll have to look online or even Instagram for "fun" meals... maybe incorporate more than the ~80g carbs per day I tend to see. I used to meal prep years ago when I first was out of college but I tended to find the food lost a lot of flavor and had weird textures by Weds/Thurs, if I prepped it all Sunday night.

 

[purbeast0]

I pretty much stick to a low carb meal plan during the week as well. I guess I forgot to mention that. I don't go for 0 carbs or anything, but I'm usually under 30 net carbs daily.

 

[deadlyapp]

I work out between 1.5 to 2 hours a day generally, and when I track my calorie expenditure using a chest strap it's around 800 cal burned per session. I consume around 200-225g total carbs per day, around 50g fat, and around 180g protein. This allows for probably 200-400 cal deficit

 

[z1ggy]

I work out between 1.5 to 2 hours a day generally, and when I track my calorie expenditure using a chest strap it's around 800 cal burned per session. I consume around 200-225g total carbs per day, around 50g fat, and around 180g protein. This allows for probably 200-400 cal deficit

How much do you weight, what's your (estimated) body fat and how heavy are you lifting? I could probably use your numbers to estimate some calorie burning from the gym.

In my day when I was at my peak I was around 184lb and dead lifting 365-ish, 235-ish bench, 285-ish squat, doing a PPL weekly routine. I was cutting on 2100-2300 a day during the week and I even drank occasionally. Now when I lift, even if I was doing PPL my numbers would not be even close to this - the last time I benched, I was struggling to rep 185.

 

[deadlyapp]

How much do you weight, what's your (estimated) body fat and how heavy are you lifting? I could probably use your numbers to estimate some calorie burning from the gym.

In my day when I was at my peak I was around 184lb and dead lifting 365-ish, 235-ish bench, 285-ish squat, doing a PPL weekly routine. I was cutting on 2100-2300 a day during the week and I even drank occasionally. Now when I lift, even if I was doing PPL my numbers would not be even close to this - the last time I benched, I was struggling to rep 185.

I posted some numbers above, but I'm right around 185 and 18% BF according to an impedance scale. Based on my current definition, I suspect I'm closer to 13-14% BF by Dexa scan.

I vary my workload in the gym, however generally average around 20-40 minutes of lifting (either Olympic lifting or main lifts, sometimes with some superset accessory work) and generally a 15-20 minute metabolic conditioning piece. My numbers are around 385-405 deadlift, 225-245 bench, and 345-365 squat.

For example yesterday my entire session was 1:45
6x5 high hang power snatches
16 minute metcon of overhead squat & rowing

4rd
8 tempo back squat (worked up to 225)
8 single leg banded KB squat at tempo

15 minutes steady biking

Total calorie expenditure was 1026. Heart rate peaked at around 180 for the conditioning, spiked to 170 for squat work.

 

[z1ggy]

Yeah so "back in the day" when I was basically your exact specs for weight/bf, I was probably burning around 400 cals, because I was time limited at the gym (used the one at work, but it was a legit gym).

For now I think I will try and keep my Mon-Fri diet mostly the same as best I can, stay low carb low cal. Now that I am injury with an ankle sprain from last week, my activity level is basically 0. For weekends, I will meal prep Sat morning all my meals for Sat and Sun, and go grocery shopping Friday night after dinner, around 730pm. I'm hoping this will help me avoid buying bad foods since I shouldn't be hungry.

 

[deadlyapp]

Yeah so "back in the day" when I was basically your exact specs for weight/bf, I was probably burning around 400 cals, because I was time limited at the gym (used the one at work, but it was a legit gym).

For now I think I will try and keep my Mon-Fri diet mostly the same as best I can, stay low carb low cal. Now that I am injury with an ankle sprain from last week, my activity level is basically 0. For weekends, I will meal prep Sat morning all my meals for Sat and Sun, and go grocery shopping Friday night after dinner, around 730pm. I'm hoping this will help me avoid buying bad foods since I shouldn't be hungry.

I think this is a really intelligent plan - starting off the weekend quickly with good choices will usually keep you successful.

 

[z1ggy]

I think this is a really intelligent plan - starting off the weekend quickly with good choices will usually keep you successful.

Yep, this is my hope. Now I just need to get my wife on board because lately she's been stress eating, too. Last month, I Think we went out for dinner 3 or 4 times and consumed a ton of calories. I'm okay once a month going out to our favorite place (a nice Korean restaurant) but it just can't be weekly. For one, that's expensive and two it's a crazy amount of food they give you. I'm guessing one Bimimbop bowl is like 1000 calories.

 

[deadlyapp]

Yep, this is my hope. Now I just need to get my wife on board because lately she's been stress eating, too. Last month, I Think we went out for dinner 3 or 4 times and consumed a ton of calories. I'm okay once a month going out to our favorite place (a nice Korean restaurant) but it just can't be weekly. For one, that's expensive and two it's a crazy amount of food they give you. I'm guessing one Bimimbop bowl is like 1000 calories.

My wife is thankfully very rigorous with her eating and recently hired a dietitian to help with hormone control through diet so when one of us feels like stress eating the other balances it out. When we do eat out, we look at the menus and plan our eating accordingly, which allows us to still enjoy eating out while not completely ruining any progress we've made.

 

[rstrohkirch]

. For weekends, I will meal prep Sat morning all my meals for Sat and Sun, and go grocery shopping Friday night after dinner, around 730pm. I'm hoping this will help me avoid buying bad foods since I shouldn't be hungry.

Do you often do things on Fridays? If so you may want to meal prep your weekend on Thursday night.

 

[z1ggy]

Do you often do things on Fridays? If so you may want to meal prep your weekend on Thursday night.

Not usually, but what ends up happening is all the stress of the week culminates and one of us caves and whips out some kind of snack. I never used to have this issue because we lived apart while dating and honestly my last job wasn't really stressful.

However, I went shopping as I stated I would at night after dinner this week and I don't have snacks in the house anymore. Just my normal food, so complying this weekend should hopefully go well. I will also be going back to the gym to do some upper body work outs this week, I just can't do any pulls or anything which I need to lift and stand due to my ankle.