Guilt is a guy thing. Especially since i realized recently that i was a real asshole. I never much knew, except when it finally just caused me to lose someone i loved very much. Maybe forever it looks like. Im not looking for encouragement. Guilt has its place I guess -it shows you have a conciouncess. One question though ,are you still an asshole even if noones really around to get hurt by it-- I mean, have I always been an asshole but just not known it? how does one deal with irrepairable damage done to a loved one who could have been saved by the right kind of care? well, guess i will go put on "aint no sunshine when shes gone, and drink myself into a blind stupor- THATS THE BLUES JACK!