If you ask a girl out now and she says "no", is she more likely to say "no" down the road?

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skywalker66

Banned
Nov 5, 2001
695
0
0
If you ask a girl out now and she says "no", is she more likely to say "no" down the road?

That is the question.

I guess I'm curious to know because I'm wondering if I should ask a girl out now, or if I should wait and ask later, when I think she is more likely to say yes,

She might say no now, because I either do not know her well enough or I am not high enough for her standards.
But over time I could:
get to know her better... and get high enough for her standards (make myself more physically attractive, become more disciplined, become more successful and feel more happier about myself, etc) all of these things could raise myself to a higher level, capable of meeting the standards of the high fish (er the smart, good, and goodlooking girls who's standards are very high)
personally I think it's worth going through the work, to get a chick like that, and I would gladly work to get up to her level.

The question is... for the end purpose in mind.. does this make sense to do?
Because in the mean time she might meet some other guy, and hook up with him, and then I would be stuck.
And what if I would have been good-enough for her from the get go? (even though I was unsure of my chances)
and what if it woulda coulda worked out from the get go?


So the real question boys is...

1) wait and make yourself more attractive, and then ask?

2) or...... ask, and if she says no, then make yourself more attractive, then ask her again.

wadda ya guys think is the better decision, and why?
 

if you were talking about sex instead of going out i would say yes. Since she wont even go out with you, I would think that only a nuclear holocaust would help you.
 
Z

zixxer

Diamond Member
Jul 6, 2001
7,326
0
0
um. you shouldnt change yourself like that. just kill her, keep her dead body in a freezer where you can obsess over her allll dayyyy longggg
 
T

TheNinja

Lifer
Jan 22, 2003
12,207
1
0
Just ask her now if she wants to go out for dinner sometime, or even lunch. If she says no b/c you aren't up to her "standards" then why would you want to ask her later anyway b/c you know she is a stuck up snob.
 
F

freegeeks

Diamond Member
May 7, 2001
5,460
1
81
Originally posted by: Phocas
if you were talking about sex instead of going out i would say yes. Since she wont even go out with you, I would think that only a nuclear holocaust would help you.
Click to expand...


LOL
 
A

amnesiac

Lifer
Oct 13, 1999
15,781
1
71
All the looks in the world won't help you if you have no self confidence. Girls, much like bees, dogs, and Cthulu, can smell fear a mile away.

Grow a pair and ask her out. If she had any vague interest beforehand she'll at least grace you with a date.

If she says no, then it was never meant to be, and you should stop talking to her. Don't try to be friends, don't hang out with her more and see if you grow on her, because that never leads to anything good. Unless you count being used as a doormat as something "good."

But seriously, most girls are less shallow than the majority of guys, at least the ones worth dating are. If she goes out with you based on your looks / money alone, then you're gonna get hurt down the road anyway. If she goes out with you because of who you are, then you actually got something going there.

If you get rejected, don't take it as the end of the world. I've been infatuated with way more girls than I could care to think about, and have been shot down plenty of times. I find that the best success comes when you don't try too hard and when the girl sees that you are a quality human being by how you treat other people. I'm serious.

Doing stupid stuff like trying to make yourself "perfect" for this girl, buying her gifts, and doing everything short of just SACKING UP AND ASKING HER ON A DATE is an express train to failure.
 
sygyzy

sygyzy

Lifer
Oct 21, 2000
14,001
4
76
Originally posted by: amnesiac
All the looks in the world won't help you if you have no self confidence. Girls, much like bees, dogs, and Cthulu, can smell fear a mile away.

Grow a pair and ask her out. If she had any vague interest beforehand she'll at least grace you with a date.

If she says no, then it was never meant to be, and you should stop talking to her. Don't try to be friends, don't hang out with her more and see if you grow on her, because that never leads to anything good. Unless you count being used as a doormat as something "good."

But seriously, most girls are less shallow than the majority of guys, at least the ones worth dating are. If she goes out with you based on your looks / money alone, then you're gonna get hurt down the road anyway. If she goes out with you because of who you are, then you actually got something going there.

If you get rejected, don't take it as the end of the world. I've been infatuated with way more girls than I could care to think about, and have been shot down plenty of times. I find that the best success comes when you don't try too hard and when the girl sees that you are a quality human being by how you treat other people. I'm serious.

Doing stupid stuff like trying to make yourself "perfect" for this girl, buying her gifts, and doing everything short of just SACKING UP AND ASKING HER ON A DATE is an express train to failure.
Click to expand...


Wise words from a wise man.
 
BD231

BD231

Lifer
Feb 26, 2001
10,568
138
106
Don't change for someone else, do it for yourself. You have no clue what your ability is going to be in the long run when it comes to maintaing that "standard" you speak of.

If your overweight and just don't cut the bill, grow up and stop eating sh*tty foods, plain and simple.

I'd never base a relationship on looks alone though man, you may be putting out all that work only to find out you've always been perfectly acceptable physically, but she just feels your retarted.
 
Platypus

Platypus

Lifer
Apr 26, 2001
31,046
321
136
jesus I wonder how the nerd population can even multiply with questions like these.
 
D

dirtboy

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
6,745
1
81
I don't know. Once a girl tells me no, she never hears or sees of me again. I'm not going to waste my time with someone who is not interested.

If they are not interested now, but might be later, who says I will want them later?

Just ask her and if she says no, go on with your life.
 
olds

olds

Elite Member
Mar 3, 2000
50,101
771
126
If she says no because she is busy and asks for a rain check, ask her again.
If she just says no, pass on her.
 
DainBramaged

DainBramaged

Lifer
Jun 19, 2003
23,454
41
91
Originally posted by: se7enty7
um. you shouldnt change yourself like that. just kill her, keep her dead body in a freezer where you can obsess over her allll dayyyy longggg
Click to expand...

*singing*

Because I need a Girl that make me happy,
A girl that make me cry,
A girl that passed away back in 1985.
A girl I plan to marry,
A girl I plan to wed,
A girl that I can choke because my baby is already dead.

Cemetery lady,
my cemetery girl,
Cemetery baby,
I want you in my world.
Cemetery woman,
we can still be down,
You're more than just a corpse to a psychopathic clown.

:D
 
D

DaviDaVinci

Golden Member
Dec 28, 2000
1,345
0
0
I have something to say but I'll just paste a convo later when I get off work. In the meantime. NO means "try harder", only if she's worth it.
 
Y

y2kc

Platinum Member
Sep 2, 2000
2,547
0
76
If you ask a girl out now and she says "no", is she more likely to say "no" down the road?
Click to expand...

why not go ask some girls... why not ask the girl in question, at least you'll know where she stands on the issue.
 
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