I think I'm going through a midlife crisis at 31

[Arkitech]

I feel like I'm losing it. Everyday I have to literally drag myself into work in the morning and I suffer through 8-10 hours of being somewhere I don't want to be. I'm glad to have a job and all but I feel like my soul is dying a little bit at a time, all the things that I want to do in life are constantly being put on hold because I simply don't have the time to pursue them. I'm 31 and I'm realizing that I have NEVER really done anything that I wanted to do. I spent most of my life trying to be the good kid, especially since my father was'nt around when I grew up and I was trying to set the example for my younger brother. Its like one day I woke up and realized that soon I won't be young anymore and all the things that young people get to do has passed me by. I just wish I could take some time and just enjoy life instead of having to constantly rush around, meet deadlines and fight through traffic. I think if I can just hang on for another year or less I might be able to purchase a few apartment buildings and live off of the rent that I collect but its getting harder and harder to be patient. I just really long for some interrupted peace and solitude even if its only for a little while.

Anybody else out there going through some tough times?

 

[dabuddha]

Sounds like you need a vacation. Maybe take a few weeks off and hit the Caribbean

 

[IGBT]

Time to go on a 2 week cruise. I hear the one that goes to Alaska is amazing. Like going back in time...

 

[hopeless879]

Yeah, definately sounds like you need a vacation, at least 2 weeks. I'd go to somewhere very exotic and away from it all, nothing in America. If you have the funds I would say travel to Africa or Nepal or Australia. Some place where you can just lay back and enjoy the sceneary.

This is probably happening to you at a younger age because you had to take over your fathers responsibilities as a child and probably matured faster. Don't worry everything will get better.

 

[Arkitech]

Yeh maybe I do need a vacation, but I don't if I'll be able to take one this year. I do real estate investing on the side and I've had to use some of my vacation time to take care of some business. If I could concentrate on my real estate full time I'd be MUCH happier, I'm almost tempted to just quit my job and see what happens but then again I can't afford to make any mistakes considering I just bought a new home not to long ago.

 

[chin311]

I agree on the vacation advice...2 week cruise sounds like the winner...it should be refreshing to say the least

 

[jfall]

Take vacation, rent office space

 

[Saltin]

If you don't already, get some exercise. Regularly.

 

[Arkitech]

Originally posted by: Saltin
If you don't already, get some exercise. Regularly.

Actually I just started working out again about 3 weeks ago. It definitely helps me, in fact I've been working out everyday of the week.

 

[fumbduck]

Suicide is always a possiblity. I'm sorry for expressing my opinion.

But suicide is for those with weak souls, be strong and think of some just way to handle the situation.

 

[fumbduck]

I suggest taking a vacation.

 

Your not going through midlife crisis, your just stressing from life. When you go through midlife crisis, you will doubt the stability of your relationship or marriage, your career choices, just about everything you trust in life you will start to doubt. The good news is that it will pass in a year or two.

 

[gordy]

try some volunteer work...

cut porn out of your life, it does nothing but exacerbate the feeling of "life passing you by" or "missing out"

start a journal or write a book...

take a vacation and a good helping of "The Andy Griffith Show"

 

[skace]

Time to change what your doing. Some may say vacation, I say new job.

 

[FeathersMcGraw]

Just because you haven't done it yet doesn't mean you won't do it later. Unless, you've convinced yourself that you won't.

 

[aircooled]

If you die at 62 then this really is your midlife crisis.

 

[TheCorm]

Yeah I think a holiday is the thing to do. It also seems that trying to run your main career and your side job at the same time is getting you down. Maybe you need to pick one.....or maybe you should scrap both and go for something new entirely.

I have suffered that kind of depression from time to time too...and it can be the worse kind, where everything in your life is overall quite good yet you feel something is missing, you feel there are things you want to do.....

Jamie

 

[Electric Amish]

Originally posted by: Arkitech
I feel like I'm losing it. Everyday I have to literally drag myself into work in the morning and I suffer through 8-10 hours of being somewhere I don't want to be. I'm glad to have a job and all but I feel like my soul is dying a little bit at a time, all the things that I want to do in life are constantly being put on hold because I simply don't have the time to pursue them. I'm 31 and I'm realizing that I have NEVER really done anything that I wanted to do. I spent most of my life trying to be the good kid, especially since my father was'nt around when I grew up and I was trying to set the example for my younger brother. Its like one day I woke up and realized that soon I won't be young anymore and all the things that young people get to do has passed me by. I just wish I could take some time and just enjoy life instead of having to constantly rush around, meet deadlines and fight through traffic. I think if I can just hang on for another year or less I might be able to purchase a few apartment buildings and live off of the rent that I collect but its getting harder and harder to be patient. I just really long for some interrupted peace and solitude even if its only for a little while.

Anybody else out there going through some tough times?

I'm with you buddy! I'm 30 and feel the same damn way! :|

amish

 

[Howard]

Originally posted by: Electric Amish

Originally posted by: Arkitech
I feel like I'm losing it. Everyday I have to literally drag myself into work in the morning and I suffer through 8-10 hours of being somewhere I don't want to be. I'm glad to have a job and all but I feel like my soul is dying a little bit at a time, all the things that I want to do in life are constantly being put on hold because I simply don't have the time to pursue them. I'm 31 and I'm realizing that I have NEVER really done anything that I wanted to do. I spent most of my life trying to be the good kid, especially since my father was'nt around when I grew up and I was trying to set the example for my younger brother. Its like one day I woke up and realized that soon I won't be young anymore and all the things that young people get to do has passed me by. I just wish I could take some time and just enjoy life instead of having to constantly rush around, meet deadlines and fight through traffic. I think if I can just hang on for another year or less I might be able to purchase a few apartment buildings and live off of the rent that I collect but its getting harder and harder to be patient. I just really long for some interrupted peace and solitude even if its only for a little while.

Anybody else out there going through some tough times?

I'm with you buddy! I'm 30 and feel the same damn way! :|

amish

Is that why you hate everything?

 

[Electric Amish]

Originally posted by: Howard

Originally posted by: Electric Amish

Originally posted by: Arkitech
I feel like I'm losing it. Everyday I have to literally drag myself into work in the morning and I suffer through 8-10 hours of being somewhere I don't want to be. I'm glad to have a job and all but I feel like my soul is dying a little bit at a time, all the things that I want to do in life are constantly being put on hold because I simply don't have the time to pursue them. I'm 31 and I'm realizing that I have NEVER really done anything that I wanted to do. I spent most of my life trying to be the good kid, especially since my father was'nt around when I grew up and I was trying to set the example for my younger brother. Its like one day I woke up and realized that soon I won't be young anymore and all the things that young people get to do has passed me by. I just wish I could take some time and just enjoy life instead of having to constantly rush around, meet deadlines and fight through traffic. I think if I can just hang on for another year or less I might be able to purchase a few apartment buildings and live off of the rent that I collect but its getting harder and harder to be patient. I just really long for some interrupted peace and solitude even if its only for a little while.

Anybody else out there going through some tough times?

I'm with you buddy! I'm 30 and feel the same damn way! :|

amish

Is that why you hate everything?

No. I've always been like that.

 

[RossMAN]

A vacation is nice until the morning you have to return to the rat race and then it all goes downhill again.

 

[Rob9874]

Originally posted by: Arkitech
Its like one day I woke up and realized that soon I won't be young anymore and all the things that young people get to do has passed me by.

I've been feeling that lately. I turn 29 in September, and it's sad to think my 20's are almost over. Seems like I just turned 20 yesterday. I play guitar and have been in several bands over the years. Whereas I don't regret my decision to go the college/job route instead of being a full time musician, it was always in the back of my mind. Could I make it big if I wanted to? Not that I would try, but the opportunity was there if I wanted to. Now that 30's right around the corner, that opportunity has all but passed me by. I realize that most bands are washed up when they reach their 30's (yes there are notable exceptions), and not many bands get started at 30. Rock is a 20's game, and my days are gone.

Even the opportunities to be irresposible....to be unemployed for a while and backpack across Europe. The 20's dating scene... Young guys, take advantage of your 20's!!! Date anyone and everyone. DO NOT lock into one chick thinking she's the one. She's not. 30-year-olds told me that, and I ignored them. Now I'm telling you (and I'm sure you'll ignore me). But when your 20's pass you by, and you're not with the girl you were SURE was the one, you will kick yourself for turning down all those hot cuties who wanted to date you.

I'm not sure if it's just getting older, but time seems to go by faster. My 4 years of high school feels longer than the 9 years of my 20's. Not sure why, just does. And I'm afraid the next 10 years will go by just as fast, then I'll be 40. An old man. So my advice is to not take your 20's for granted. Don't ever say, "That would be fun, but I'll do it later." Your years from 18-25 are so fun. You're old enough to do what you want, but young enough to be stupid and irresponsible. And when they're gone, they're gone. I don't feel I used my years to the best of their potential. Don't make the same mistake.

 

[jjones]

Originally posted by: Arkitech
I feel like I'm losing it. Everyday I have to literally drag myself into work in the morning and I suffer through 8-10 hours of being somewhere I don't want to be. I'm glad to have a job and all but I feel like my soul is dying a little bit at a time, all the things that I want to do in life are constantly being put on hold because I simply don't have the time to pursue them. I'm 31 and I'm realizing that I have NEVER really done anything that I wanted to do. I spent most of my life trying to be the good kid, especially since my father was'nt around when I grew up and I was trying to set the example for my younger brother. Its like one day I woke up and realized that soon I won't be young anymore and all the things that young people get to do has passed me by. I just wish I could take some time and just enjoy life instead of having to constantly rush around, meet deadlines and fight through traffic. I think if I can just hang on for another year or less I might be able to purchase a few apartment buildings and live off of the rent that I collect but its getting harder and harder to be patient. I just really long for some interrupted peace and solitude even if its only for a little while.

Anybody else out there going through some tough times?

Sounds to me like you're doing the things you think you should do and putting aside the things you want to do. Be a little selfish once in a while and do something for yourself for today instead of doing things always for tomorrow. Vacations are good but it can also be something as simple as going out and buying the best coffee grind available and perking a fresh brew and taking the time to enjoy it with a bright morning sunrise. Whatever it is, you need to pamper yourself a little from time to time so that what you're doing for your future continues to seem worthwhile today.

 

[Rob9874]

Whereas vacations are nice, retired people can take vacations. I think OP is talking about losing the opportunity to do the things 20-somethings can do.

 

[911paramedic]

Looks like somebody has a delayed case of the Monday's.