I think I just made a telemarketer cry...

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T

TStep

Platinum Member
Feb 16, 2003
2,460
10
81
Telemarketers are fun.

I find they like it when I ask them personal questions like,
-Does your dog ever get the mange?
-How do you clean grass stains out of your bedsheets?

Or, they also like business propositions like,
-If I buy yours, will enter into a contract for 85 acres prime developable Florida swampland?
-Will you accept livestock as barter for your goods?

Or, they enjoy enthusiastic customers,
-How much of a discount if I buy one million, and can I get them tomorrow by 10 am?
-That sounds great, I'll give one to each of my friends from the planet Jupiter.
-How is your telephone signal when I'm trying to call from the darkside of the moon?
 
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FawnBabe

Junior Member
Mar 23, 2004
4
0
0
Telemarketing is the hardest job in the world. That was my first "real" job. Sold newspaper supscriptions. I think it ranks along with road kill clean up. My boyfriend at the time thought I had it easy until he tried it. He would get pissed when people hung up on him so he'd call them back and say "how does it feel?" (click).He was fired within a month. I lasted a year and a half.

 
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brnbngls

Senior member
Feb 12, 2001
418
0
0
The best I ever pulled on a telemarketer was in the middle of the day on a Friday. It was AT&T.

My wife had just gotten done having "relations" and the phone rings. The salesperson says "Good afternoon and how are you today sir?" I respond "Grrreeat! I just got done getting laid." The person had no idea what to do with that information and hung up themselves.

Messing with telemarketers is great fun!
 
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FawnBabe

Junior Member
Mar 23, 2004
4
0
0
Telemarketing is the hardest job in the world. That was my first "real" job. Sold newspaper supscriptions. I think it ranks along with road kill clean up. My boyfriend at the time thought I had it easy until he tried it. He would get pissed when people hung up on him so he'd call them back and say "how does it feel?" (click).He was fired within a month. I lasted a year and a half.

 
Kelemvor

Kelemvor

Lifer
May 23, 2002
16,928
8
81
Awesome! Telemarketers deserve whatever they get. No one asked for them to intrude upon my privacy in my own home so if you can make them cry, More Power To You!
 
T

TheNinja

Lifer
Jan 22, 2003
12,207
1
0
Originally posted by: FawnBabe
Telemarketing is the hardest job in the world. That was my first "real" job. Sold newspaper supscriptions. I think it ranks along with road kill clean up. My boyfriend at the time thought I had it easy until he tried it. He would get pissed when people hung up on him so he'd call them back and say "how does it feel?" (click).He was fired within a month. I lasted a year and a half.
Click to expand...

That's quite a feat there FawnBabe. You have a total of 2 posts and it was a double :beer:
 
WHipLAsh13

WHipLAsh13

Golden Member
Jan 17, 2001
1,719
0
76
Best thing to do to a telemarketer which I took from a movie:

Tell them you are busy and would like their home phone so you can call them back.

They will say no I can not give you my home phone.

You say why not, Don't like when people call you at home?
Well neither do I and hang up.

 
B

blakeatwork

Diamond Member
Jul 18, 2001
4,113
1
81
Originally posted by: ThePresence
Originally posted by: Sysadmin
Originally posted by: Cuda1447
Haha, whats wrong with lawyers?
Click to expand...

You obviously never been sucked dry by one :)

Sysadmin
Click to expand...
I have. My GF is a lawyer.
Click to expand...


ZING!!

:D Surprisingly enough, I had much the same thought... only it was in a hypothetical sense... of course...

 
Cuda1447

Cuda1447

Lifer
Jul 26, 2002
11,757
0
71
Originally posted by: WHipLAsh13
Best thing to do to a telemarketer which I took from a movie:

Tell them you are busy and would like their home phone so you can call them back.

They will say no I can not give you my home phone.

You say why not, Don't like when people call you at home?
Well neither do I and hang up.
Click to expand...


Haha thats a nice one.
 
T

TheNinja

Lifer
Jan 22, 2003
12,207
1
0
Originally posted by: WHipLAsh13
Best thing to do to a telemarketer which I took from a movie:

Tell them you are busy and would like their home phone so you can call them back.

They will say no I can not give you my home phone.

You say why not, Don't like when people call you at home?
Well neither do I and hang up.
Click to expand...

OK Seinfeld ;)
 
Vic

Vic

Elite Member
Jun 12, 2001
50,422
14,337
136
Originally posted by: kranky
I get calls from the American Veteran Handicapped Workers Society (something like that) and the person on the phone will start with "Hello, Mr. kranky, this is your old buddy Dave from the [society]. You know, the handicapped people? You bought our [light bulbs/trash bags/etc.] from us last year (I never did) and we're calling back our friends to offer you some more great deals. Since this is the only job I can get because of my handicap, I depend on good people like you to help me make a living."

"No thanks, I'm not interested"

"But Mr. kranky (crying, now) I need to earn a living. This is all I have! My rent is due and I have to sell 40 more cartons of light bulbs before I can go home tonight! Please, please, Mr. kranky, I need your help! I don't want to go back to the shelter!"

<click>

The people never do a good job of faking it. It's like a junior high acting class.
Click to expand...
In sales, trying to convince the customer to buy your product just so that you can get paid is generally considered the weakest and most demeaning close possible. As a salesperson (and I don't considered telemarketers to be salespeople), if another salesperson were to use that weakass close on me, I would refuse to buy from them out of spite. Even more so if it were real than if they were faking it.
The product is for the customer, not the salesperson. If the customer is not benefited, then there was never a deal to begin with, and you can't lose money you never had.

Originally posted by: FrankyJunior
Awesome! Telemarketers deserve whatever they get. No one asked for them to intrude upon my privacy in my own home so if you can make them cry, More Power To You!
Click to expand...
You are an idiot. They are people doing a job like any other. By leaving your phone plugged in and on the hook, and especially by actually answering it, you are inviting people to "intrude upon on my privacy in my own home". Unplug your phone or (better yet) disconnect your service if you want your privacy.
Otherwise, get a fscking clue, moron.
 
B

boomdart

Senior member
Jan 10, 2004
825
0
0
My dad b****d out a telemarketer once... She called back and was talking to mom about how "Your husband is not a nice guy :( :( :(" She was crying. Poor girl. lol :p
 
S

slpaulson

Diamond Member
Jun 5, 2000
4,414
14
81
One time a telemarketer called me, and I said "no habla english." A few minutes later, a telemarketer called me speaking Spanish.
Good times.
 
M

MikeMike

Lifer
Feb 6, 2000
45,885
66
91
MCI called once when my cousin was living with us. it was classic.

Hi, i am with MCI friends and family, i was calling to offer you a friends and family phone plan.
(my cuz) Sorry, i have no family.
What about friends?
(cuz) Nope, no friends either.

CLICK

MIKE
 
F

Farfrael

Senior member
Mar 6, 2002
312
0
0
Originally posted by: Vic
Otherwise, get a fscking clue, moron.
Click to expand...

Funny, exactly what i was going to tell you.
Tell us how you really like to be called at home by somebody you don't know who wants to sell you <insert crappy item here> ?

 
S

sharkeeper

Lifer
Jan 13, 2001
10,886
2
0
Do what any other geek would do. On any form that asks for a phone number, put down an IP address instead! :D

Cheers!
 
Vic

Vic

Elite Member
Jun 12, 2001
50,422
14,337
136
Originally posted by: Farfrael
Originally posted by: Vic
Otherwise, get a fscking clue, moron.
Click to expand...
Funny, exactly what i was going to tell you.
Tell us how you really like to be called at home by somebody you don't know who wants to sell you <insert crappy item here> ?
Click to expand...
In marketing terms, I don't "respond well" to telemarketing. That means that I'm unlikely to ever purchase a product from someone who calls me out of the blue.
However, I'm not so stupid and ignorant as to blame, accost, or otherwise abuse the poor hireling who calls me. He/she is just doing what they're told so they can get a paycheck. When they call (which is very rare), I politely tell them I am not interested and to remove me from their list. No big deal. As long as my phone is plugged in and connected to the service, literally anyone could call me. Claiming that you desire "privacy" while answering your phone is about the stupidest thing I've ever heard of.

I don't see why you idiots get all up in arms about it anyway. For most of you nerds, telemarketing calls are probably the only call(s) you get at home all day. And certainly, the only ones you ever get with a female is when a female telemarketer calls.
 
R

Ranger X

Lifer
Mar 18, 2000
11,218
1
0
Originally posted by: WHipLAsh13
Best thing to do to a telemarketer which I took from a movie:

Tell them you are busy and would like their home phone so you can call them back.

They will say no I can not give you my home phone.

You say why not, Don't like when people call you at home?
Well neither do I and hang up.
Click to expand...
That's from Seinfeld.
 
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