I need your help. A stranger is hounding my mom :(

[Jzero]

<< They can't be held responsible, i think being held responsible for personal safety is not part of the lease contract. They used to have a security guard at the main gate but let go of him a couple of years ago. >>

That's not entirely true. As with everything, the laws vary from state to state and town to town, but in many places, while the landlord isn't contractually obliged to secure the premises, they still can be held negligent if they knew there was a threat and did nothing about it. The notices he put up may or may not be sufficient (since the laws aren't universal).
In other words, the landlord actually could be held responsible for knowing that this guy is lurking the grounds, but not hiring a patrol or getting police involved.

Also, if your mama hasn't filed a police report yet, she definitely should, and the police should be asked to keep an eye out.

 

[rootaxs]

Let's be reasonable and not let go of emotions here will you please?




<< you are making some really god damn stupid excuses for not letting her move in with you. she's your mother, quit whining about your f***ing sleep cycle >>

 

[rootaxs]

That thing is pepper spray? Dang!

I'll go check it out. Thanks!



<< Go to the local outdoor/camping store and purchase a bottle of bear repelant. It's about the size of a small can of hair spray and sprays a fairly large cloud roughly 15 ft. It's usually made from a highly refined capsicin <sp>. In other words it's a big fvcking can of pepper spray. If she has a good sized purse and can fit it in there she should be able to get it out pretty quick. Never underestimate how much the lack of breathing and seeing can inhibit someone. If you do get her this stuff make sure and tell her never to use it in an enclosed space or it will overcome her too. >>

 

[rootaxs]

You have a valid point there. According to the building manager they do have a courtesy officer on-call but you have to call them up first using the call service and go through some options. And even when you contact them they're not allowed to escort anyone in the premises nor engage in any fights or arrests (go figure).

I'll inform her to file a police report asap. Thanks!



<<

<< They can't be held responsible, i think being held responsible for personal safety is not part of the lease contract. They used to have a security guard at the main gate but let go of him a couple of years ago. >>

That's not entirely true. As with everything, the laws vary from state to state and town to town, but in many places, while the landlord isn't contractually obliged to secure the premises, they still can be held negligent if they knew there was a threat and did nothing about it. The notices he put up may or may not be sufficient (since the laws aren't universal).
In other words, the landlord actually could be held responsible for knowing that this guy is lurking the grounds, but not hiring a patrol or getting police involved.

Also, if your mama hasn't filed a police report yet, she definitely should, and the police should be asked to keep an eye out. >>

 

[bgruver]

Is it possible for you to help her pay the lease off early?

I think you should let her stay with you for a while. How crowded can it be in a house with just one other person? Even if you
lived in a small trailer home it would be worth it if it gave you both some peace of mind. I've heard stories of people with 5 or so
other siblings living in a one bedroom apartment - their entire childhood. A few weeks certainly can't hurt, besides it's your mom.

 

[Kev]

<< Let's be reasonable and not let go of emotions here will you please?




<< you are making some really god damn stupid excuses for not letting her move in with you. she's your mother, quit whining about your f***ing sleep cycle >>

>>

Yeah, that's exactly what I would do if my mother was being stalked. I would be reasonable

 

[db]

In the meantime, if she see someone like this again, SHE NEEDS TO CALL THE POLICE IMMEDIATELY!

 

[rootaxs]

Very possible. No problem there.

As for her moving in with me, i've asked her but she doesnt' want to for several reasons which i personally think isn't very rational but i'm still bringing it up nevertheless.

Thanks.



<< Is it possible for you to help her pay the lease off early?

I think you should let her stay with you for a while. How crowded can it be in a house with just one other person? Even if you
lived in a small trailer home it would be worth it if it gave you both some peace of mind. I've heard stories of people with 5 or so
other siblings living in a one bedroom apartment - their entire childhood. A few weeks certainly can't hurt, besides it's your mom. >>

 

[rootaxs]

You don't sound very rational. Did i say i'm not letting her move in with me? did i say i wouldn't do anything to keep her from harms way? I was merely stating the facts. I could tell you all the facts about why things can and cannot happen in our case but that's not my intention. My intention was soliciting some suggestions and not some responses complaining about the person soliciting the advices.

I said lets be reasonable and stop with the insulting posts. I didn't ask to be insulted at this time of need.

Have a good day sir.



<<

<< Let's be reasonable and not let go of emotions here will you please?




<< you are making some really god damn stupid excuses for not letting her move in with you. she's your mother, quit whining about your f***ing sleep cycle >>

>>

Yeah, that's exactly what I would do if my mother was being stalked. I would be reasonable >>

 

[Jzero]

<< And even when you contact them they're not allowed to escort anyone in the premises nor engage in any fights or arrests (go figure). >>


LOL
I can see them not being permitted to get involved with fights or make arrests--they're not cops, but they can't escort anyone? Maybe it's supposed to be more of a concierge-type thing?



<< I'll inform her to file a police report asap. Thanks! >>



N/P. That way, there is a record of the occurrence which will help if they guy is ever arrested, or if it comes down to the tennants filing suit against the management. She should also file a report if it occurs again. In some places, if there is a "pattern of behavior" the police will do more. For instance, in my town, if someone gives you a threatening phone call, and you file a police report. They probably won't do anything other than make a record. If it happens again next week and you call the police again, they'll file a second report, but now they will also get trace from the phone company and go after the caller.
Likewise, if there are reports of incidents in your mom's complex, the police may patrol more frequently or try to catch the guy.

Re:

<< It's usually made from a highly refined capsicin <sp>. >>


That was bear spray? Heh...I just thought it was a cute name for hot sauce!

 

[Ronstang]

rootaxs,

Since you live in Texas You have more options than most. Although the pepper spray/taser suggestions aren't bad they are not always a foolfroop method. They also create one angry bastard that can come back later and do even more damage. You need to get yourmom a handgun and go with her to get certified to carry it. Don't laugh, my friend's 65 year old mother qualifies when necessary and she carries one with her (a .45 none the less). This is eactly the kind of situation where one needs a gun for self protection. Any way you play this you need to start escorting your mom home in the evenings until something can be done to stop this creep.

 

[rahvin]

Here is a link to some of the stuff I was talking about.

http://www.pimall.com/nais/bearspray.html

The stuff they sell as repellant for bears is stronger than what they use for human pepper sprays (for obvious reasons, bears are rarely reasonable). They cloud better and spray farther (some up to 30').

 

[Monel Funkawitz]

Nothing says "Leave me alone, creep" like a handgun or a shotgun.

 

[Viper GTS]

<< Nothing says "Leave me alone, creep" like a handgun or a shotgun. >>



Bingo. Tasers are good for close range only, and you have to get a few seconds of solid contact to really take someone down. The odds of her getting that are slim to none, given her description of his physical build. Also, in spite of the fact that being hit with a taser hurts like a bitch, it does no permanent damage. So the only real deterrent is the pain & temporary immobilization.

However, a Glock has amazing deterrent properties.

Glock 27

Viper GTS

 

[Croton]

Get a big ass dog.

Why can't u move into her place for a week or so? Sure, it might be inconvienient, and u might have to commute further, but at least you'll have peace of mind knowing your mom is safe.

I know if anytime my momma needed me, i'd drop everything and do waht I could to help her -- after all, she has done more than enough for me....

good luck on the situation. let us know what you do about it.

 

[clarkmo]

A) Police Report
B) Stun Gun
C) The lease is breakable under these conditions. I would not think twice. I would do A + B or A + C.
Do it now, you're wasting time. :|

 

[Rent]

Small firearm... thats what my mom carries when alone or on long trips.

 

[Texmaster]

<< Well.......I'd say the first thing you should probably do if your only 15 miles away is either stay with your Mom for a few nights, or at least escort her home if possible or find someone whom can! I know I sure as hell wouldn't be leaving my mother alone under those circumstances............. >>



Completly agree. And the tazer and pepper spray isn't a bad idea either.

 

[Hammer]

Place a Claymore facing away from her door. Hand her the clacker. Instant protection.

 

[Texmaster]

rootaxs,

A lot of people here have made good suggestions.

I think one of the best would be for you and her to switch locations for about a week. Let the freak see you going in and out of her apartment. Let him think there is a man living there.

Also, the tazer idea is the best.

These guys are the best. I bought mine there and the guys there are great. I'm sure they would cut you a deal on faster shipping if you called and explained the situation to them.

 

[PrinceofWands]

I've been in security/military/law enforcement for about 12 years now. I also have given some community security/safety classes. I have a few things to point out about the security options being mentioned.

1. No device will ever be as important as education. Get a good safety/security class and stay alert. There is no piece of equipment that will help like your own mind.

2. Chemical agents. All the sprays and gasses and such are questionable. They may be better than nothing, but lack of training or understanding makes them more of a liability than an aid. I've been hit with every agent you can name, and ONLY the law enforcement strength foams affect me. Pepper spray, tear gas, canisters, you name it...I will stare you right in the face while you use them, then I'll calmly take them away from you and use them against you. I'm not that uncommon either. Everyone is affected differently by them, but many people (especially under the influence of various drugs) are hardly affected at all. You also have to be able to get the spray into play, and you have to be able to continue functioning after you yourself get some of the backspray and a host of other problems. Sprays really aren't much of anything.

3. Electrical devices. Tazers, stun guns and such are overall more effective than chemicals, WHEN YOU CAN USE THEM. You can't just walk around with it out (brandishing) so you have to have time to get it out and they're usually vairly bulky. Also, many have poor safety systems so you're risking personal injury by carrying them. There are two types, projected and contact. Projected requires distance and a lucky shot to hit the target. These suffer from thick clothing layers of protection. Contact are more powerful, but can easily be taken away from someone without extensive training.


Overall, for someone who isn't going to undergo extensive training, the best options are to learn about security. Avoid bad situations to begin with. Hiring a security professional is a wonderful alternative, just make sure you get someone good. Being seen as her security might keep away the random criminals, but it will just cause a determined individual to get more agitated. The best option in these cases is covert surveillance, leading to a strong case against the individual. They'll still be close enough to protect her if he moves, and the evidence they gather will be invaluable in court later.

Just my initial reactions, there are a lot of other factors to consider. Feel free to PM or email me for more. Good luck. (and don't waith around on this, there is no tomorrow when safety is concerned)

 

[rahvin]

<< 2. Chemical agents. All the sprays and gasses and such are questionable. They may be better than nothing, but lack of training or understanding makes them more of a liability than an aid. I've been hit with every agent you can name, and ONLY the law enforcement strength foams affect me. Pepper spray, tear gas, canisters, you name it...I will stare you right in the face while you use them, then I'll calmly take them away from you and use them against you. I'm not that uncommon either. >>



Buy some of that bear repellant and spray yourself let us know how it goes. Seriously, that stuff is WAY stronger than they can legally sell for use against humans. Bear repellants are often labeled as effective against grizzley bears and there are few animals with a meaner temperment and desire to kill even after being shot. It is my understanding that the capisican (I know I'm spelling that wrong) is pure enough in the repellant to actually cause the skin to burn (not just the muccous membranes).

Otherwise I would say your advice is great. But the best advice is to get her out of the situation.

 

[XMan]

Place a Claymore facing away from her door. Hand her the clacker. Instant protection.

LOL! What do they, "This Side Toward Target", I think?

 

[killface]

Tell your mom to ugly herself up a bit. Hill billy teeth, gray wig, etc. Then the guy will lose interest and stop hanging around the complex.

 

[Hammer]

Actually, it says FRONT TOWARD ENEMY



<< Place a Claymore facing away from her door. Hand her the clacker. Instant protection.

LOL! What do they, "This Side Toward Target", I think? >>