- Jan 10, 2001
- 30,772
- 13
- 81
I usually frown upon posting stuff like this but here goes:
Background
I have 4 brothers, we will call them R, P, M, and A. They are in the order they were born, with myself coming last. They range in age from 34-39 (useless trivia, R & P are 9 months and 2 days apart).
R is diagnosed as being bipolar triggered by alcohol. About 7 years ago, he snapped and went into a catatonic state for about one year. His wife took care of him and their son during this time. He did not work, go out, talk, he just sat there. He was petrified that crows and pigs were coming to get him. This took place because he decided he no longer wanted his meds and instead, preferred beer.
About 2 years ago, A started dating a woman. I did not find her to be particularly great, but he is no catch himself. They moved in together and became engaged.
While they were dating, R and his wife seperated and filed for divorce. R moved in with A and his girlfriend temporarily. Well, about one week later, A walked in to find R and A's girlfriend haivng sex in A's bed. Needless to say, A freaked and threw them both out. R and the girlfriend moved in together.
They then got married about 2 months later.
Since this time, R has been in jail no less than 4 times. He has beaten up his wife twice, burned down his trailer, and attacked the police. Usually these occur during holidays, most recently, New Years. After all of this, the courts threw him in jail and had him psychiatrically evaluated. It came back that he was on the wrong meds and received a new prescription. Since then, things have been very calm.
My parents originally hated the woman who broke up the family. A and R still do not talk and A becomes enraged whenever he finds out that my parents have talked to R. To calm my parents down, P began as a mediator between R and the family. P has pushed for everyone to forget about everything and has pretty much matched things up between my parents and R and his wife. In fact, my parents recently gave them a car and a good deal of money.
Fast forward to last night. I received a letter from P addressed to all the brothers. The letter was basically a plea for everyone to come together and to forget the past. P pointed out that my parents are getting older, and by the time that they were our age, they had already buried their parents. I do not agree with this.
Honestly, I feel I will never trust R again, nor do I want to. He has spit in the face of everyone with his antics and I have voiced my opinion to everyone that they just strike all ties with him.
The big problem is that I am getting married in less than a year. I have told my family that I am not inviting R and there has been some hostility towards me because of it. I feel that if R & A are in the same room together, there will be some major problems, and I am not using my wedding as an arena for this bout.
My family is telling me that A is the real problem now, not R. R has the correct medications and is no longer causing the problems he once did. They believe the issue at hand is that A does not forgive R. I say that R is a danger to society and needs to be locked away.
CLIFF NOTES:
R sleeps with A's fiancee.
R marries A's exfiancee.
R gets arrested 4 times.
Family wants A to forgive R
Family wants R at my wedding
Background
I have 4 brothers, we will call them R, P, M, and A. They are in the order they were born, with myself coming last. They range in age from 34-39 (useless trivia, R & P are 9 months and 2 days apart).
R is diagnosed as being bipolar triggered by alcohol. About 7 years ago, he snapped and went into a catatonic state for about one year. His wife took care of him and their son during this time. He did not work, go out, talk, he just sat there. He was petrified that crows and pigs were coming to get him. This took place because he decided he no longer wanted his meds and instead, preferred beer.
About 2 years ago, A started dating a woman. I did not find her to be particularly great, but he is no catch himself. They moved in together and became engaged.
While they were dating, R and his wife seperated and filed for divorce. R moved in with A and his girlfriend temporarily. Well, about one week later, A walked in to find R and A's girlfriend haivng sex in A's bed. Needless to say, A freaked and threw them both out. R and the girlfriend moved in together.
They then got married about 2 months later.
Since this time, R has been in jail no less than 4 times. He has beaten up his wife twice, burned down his trailer, and attacked the police. Usually these occur during holidays, most recently, New Years. After all of this, the courts threw him in jail and had him psychiatrically evaluated. It came back that he was on the wrong meds and received a new prescription. Since then, things have been very calm.
My parents originally hated the woman who broke up the family. A and R still do not talk and A becomes enraged whenever he finds out that my parents have talked to R. To calm my parents down, P began as a mediator between R and the family. P has pushed for everyone to forget about everything and has pretty much matched things up between my parents and R and his wife. In fact, my parents recently gave them a car and a good deal of money.
Fast forward to last night. I received a letter from P addressed to all the brothers. The letter was basically a plea for everyone to come together and to forget the past. P pointed out that my parents are getting older, and by the time that they were our age, they had already buried their parents. I do not agree with this.
Honestly, I feel I will never trust R again, nor do I want to. He has spit in the face of everyone with his antics and I have voiced my opinion to everyone that they just strike all ties with him.
The big problem is that I am getting married in less than a year. I have told my family that I am not inviting R and there has been some hostility towards me because of it. I feel that if R & A are in the same room together, there will be some major problems, and I am not using my wedding as an arena for this bout.
My family is telling me that A is the real problem now, not R. R has the correct medications and is no longer causing the problems he once did. They believe the issue at hand is that A does not forgive R. I say that R is a danger to society and needs to be locked away.
CLIFF NOTES:
R sleeps with A's fiancee.
R marries A's exfiancee.
R gets arrested 4 times.
Family wants A to forgive R
Family wants R at my wedding
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