I made myself cry...

[Quixfire]

I know what most of might be thinking. I injured myself working on a car and I just wanted to share my pain. But the truth is I just wrote a love poem for my wife and at the end of finishing it I started crying reviewing what I had just wrote.

How pathetic is that?

Update: Since a few of you have requested the poem I will post it. It a first run poem and I haven't changed anything so please be gentle.

Eleven Roses

There standing in a crystal vase
Eleven stems of green topped each with a face
The faces of eleven years all passed behind
Reminding us of treasured memories gone by

Some are sad with times of trials
Some are somber with moments of grief
Most are happy with memories of joy
And the brightest one shows how we started it all

Yet one stem lay all alone
It?s face covered like it was ashamed
When asked why
The little rose began to shine

I am the face of the year to come
And I do not know of my ending
But I do know this above all else
I will be loved as much as those already standing.

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

Eh... post ze poyem?

 

[Hammer]

very

 

[Electric Amish]

Well, at least you have a wife to cry about.

 

[Gyrene]

Pretty damn pathetic. Get drunk, chase some tail, become a man again.

 

[Ikonomi]

So you got a bigass paper cut while writing the poem, or...??!!

 

[djheater]

What's pathetic is that you don't have the emotional strength to cry when it's warranted and used a love poem as an excuse.

Oh wait, that's me..

{{cries}}

 

[bradruth]

Strong men also cry... [/Big Lebowski]

 

[MazerRackham]

This thread just made baby jesus cry.

 

[Platypus]

talk show host

 

[thirtythree]

cute kids.

 

[Zanix]

You're a big softy who's brave enough to face the flames of OT. :beer:

althought I was hoping for a hillarious tale of nutting on a handrail or something...

 

[Ogg]

Originally posted by: Electric Amish
Well, at least you have a wife to cry about.

I thought you were married too

?

 

[bradruth]

Originally posted by: Ogg

Originally posted by: Electric Amish
Well, at least you have a wife to cry about.

I thought you were married too

?

I think he's saying that most people here AREN'T married, and that those who ridicule him should take a look at themselves.

 

[Electric Amish]

Originally posted by: Ogg

Originally posted by: Electric Amish
Well, at least you have a wife to cry about.

I thought you were married too

?

I am. I was talking about all the others here that are crying over women and/or the lack thereof.

 

[MaxDepth]

cry baby

 

[dquan97]

It's understandable...poems can be touching.

Let's hear it!!

 

[Quixfire]

I posted the poem.

 

[Amorphus]

cool.

I don't get the verse, though, and it doesn't rhyme.

My head hurts, and I'm sleepy. don't mind me.

 

[thirtythree]

Originally posted by: Quixfire
I posted the poem.

how cuuuute

 

[CaseTragedy]

nice poem. i think i just found my valentines gift.

I kid. I kid.

 

[Quixfire]

Anyone else have any comments? I would like to hear you thought on the structure or words.

 

[Electric Amish]

I think you'll get some.

 

[Czesia]

I think that's it's very sweet that you chose to write a poem for your wife. Things like that are always best. As far as the structure goes, I think that it's alright.

 

[thirtythree]

Originally posted by: Quixfire
Anyone else have any comments? I would like to hear you thought on the structure or words.

well, if you want it to sound better you could try getting some sort of rhythm and rhyme scheme. for example:

There standing in a crystal vase
Eleven stems, each with a face
The faces of eleven years
Reminding us of joy and tears