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I just realized it's 1 P.M EDT and I haven't told a joke yet.

Locutus of Board

Diamond Member
Dec 14, 1999
7,187
0
0
Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their
car which said, "TWO PROSTITUTES.......$50.00." A policeman seeing
the sign, stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove
the sign or go to jail.

Just at that time another car passed with a sign saying, "JESUS
SAVES." They asked the cop why he let the other car go and he said,
"Well, that's a little different, it pertains to religion."

So they took their sign down and the next day there they were,
driving around town with a new sign which read.........."TWO ANGELS
SEEKING PETER....... $50.00!!!!"

Ok, so this means you can tell me yours too. :cool:
 

thebestMAX

Diamond Member
Sep 14, 2000
7,457
106
106
LOB-

Looking at these results for 1pm, I am beginning to think that "you are the joke"


:D Just trying to help you out. Hope you get a lot of posts with these lame jokes.
 

thebestMAX

Diamond Member
Sep 14, 2000
7,457
106
106
SO,

You are the one who thinks a 1 is the highest rating one can give another one?
 

thebestMAX

Diamond Member
Sep 14, 2000
7,457
106
106
For you, LOB and all of my female admirers out there, you know who you are;

A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blond replies. "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?".
 

dexmanone

Senior member
Aug 31, 2000
356
0
71
In the interest of laughing off a totally wasted Friday, here's one for you:

Q: How long does it take for a women to open a beer?

A: Dam it! Best be opened by the time she gets here!
 

kassy

Guest
Sep 13, 2000
1,603
1
0
hahaha tbMax !! :D Sounds like a smart lady !!
I could share some blonde jokes but I think my butt would be banned !! :Q

 

dexmanone

Senior member
Aug 31, 2000
356
0
71
OK, it's getting later, can't wait to get out of here. Anyway, another for those in for a little "funny":

Q: Why are womens toes shorter?

A: So they can reach the kitchen counter!:D
 

thebestMAX

Diamond Member
Sep 14, 2000
7,457
106
106
LOB-

Sorry if you posted that earlier. Not trying to step on your toes, just didnt see it.

Question - How many men does it take to open a beer.

None, it better be open when the B***** brings it.

Sorry, Girls, you konw I dont think this way.
 

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