I feel lonely...

[Deleted member 4644]

Well, its actually quite odd that I feel lonely, but I do.

In fact, Im not depressed, and for several good reasons. I go to UCLA. I live in a triple room with two awesome guys. One is my best friend from elementary school. The other is a really cool guy that does almost everthing with me. Next door is another dude that hangs out with us 80% of the time and is now a good friend too. I just got made Director of the Daily Bruin Online (www.dailybruin.ucla.edu). I hang out at the office a lot, its a chill place with nice people.

Yet, here I am, sitting alone in my room for a rare moment of peace, and I feel a profound sense of loneliness. Not just because Im alone right now, but something deeper.

I havent had a GF since last year. That doesnt help. I donno... Im slow at making *good* friends, and usually I need to be friends with a girl before I can get closer*.

Hmm... any thoughts/advice/flames? haha

 

[FrustratedUser]

hmmm, LMTAI.

 

[Zim Hosein]

Yet, here I am, sitting alone in my room for a rare moment of peace

Maybe that exactly what you need LordSegan.

 

[Deleted member 4644]

Originally posted by: Zim Hosein

Yet, here I am, sitting alone in my room for a rare moment of peace

Maybe that exactly what you need LordSegan.

haha.. perhaps.. some thinking time. Or a chance to let my mind rest-- and realize its not going into a state of shock.

 

[HamSupLo]

don't feel so sad. I'd be dying to be back at UCLA. I had two of my best years ever there. man, i would use to just chill on the grass near bruinwalk on a nice sunny day and check out all the fine hunnies. *sniff*

 

[Orsorum]

It's always hard to admit that you feel lonely...

For me, I found God. Most on this board probably wouldn't agree, but I found a connection with Jesus Christ that filled part of that void.

I say part because, in reality, I think this life simply cannot be all there is. I remember talking to a friend of mine (a youth leader's fiance) my Junior year of high school about feeling lonely after getting cheated on in a relationship. He said that, even when he was married, completely happy, completely at peace with God, being a good father... even then, there was still part of him that felt empty. It's simply a part of our human condition. We're incomplete creatures.

That being said... I suffer from loneliness constantly; not something I always admit or acknowledge. I turn to God in those moments, and lay everything out to Him. That works for me; again, that being said, I long for a relationship; for the moment, there is no one I want to be with. (well, one, but she lives far away)

That's all... I don't think I had a point, but to empathize. PM or IM me if you want to chat.

 

[Kadarin]

For many people, it seems, the concept of God as a crutch for something missing in their lives holds true. I do not pretend to know all the answers, but I can say that this will never be the case for myself.

 

[gopunk]

Most on this board probably wouldn't agree, but I found a connection with Jesus Christ that filled part of that void.

nobody can disagree with that, since only you would know whether or not that is true

anyways, i don't feel lonely at all... i used to, but i dunno, it just went away after a while. i think i turned to material goods

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: gopunk
Most on this board probably wouldn't agree, but I found a connection with Jesus Christ that filled part of that void.

nobody can disagree with that, since only you would know whether or not that is true

anyways, i don't feel lonely at all... i used to, but i dunno, it just went away after a while. i think i turned to material goods

Bwa, that just made me laugh...

 

[KahunaHube]

the things you own end up owning you...

...now do me a favor and hit me as hard as you can

 

[gopunk]

Originally posted by: KahunaHube
the things you own eventually own you...

...now do me a favor and hit me as hard as you can

bah! unless you're homeless and broke, you can't escape that... the only diff is that nicer things own you

 

[KahunaHube]

maybe the homeless know something we dont....
other then being homeless and broke that is

 

[linuxboy]

maybe the homeless know something we dont....
other then being homeless and broke that is

Your words are true. If you ever have some time, go and spend it with the homeless in your city and hear about their lives. You'll be surprised at the stories and their philosophies, enough maybe to make you appreciate what you have and don't have

I havent had a GF since last year. That doesnt help. I donno... Im slow at making *good* friends, and usually I need to be friends with a girl before I can get closer*.

How old are you? At a point in life, usually during the early stages of adulthood, a profound sense of solitude pervades one's life. This is, as you suspect, the desire to mate and not only relieve latent sexual frustration but to genuinely share and have intimacy for one person. It is a drive to give and to love. It doesn't have to occur within a marital relationship and can be satisfied with friendships, though they must be very close.

There is also the point my young UW Christian brings up of recognizing your place within the grand scheme of things, his answer resting in Christianity. This too can create a way out of loneliness if you find a connection to what/who so many have called God, but it will also create new insight making my earlier points about intimacy valid, just possibly manifest in a different way.

Advice? Just a fool spewing forth banter, so take my words cautiously. This can be a good opportunity to reexamine your life and discover something about who you are and also what the world is and what your role in in the current society. You've come to a point in life when you're not a little kid and where long-term plans must be made, and positions taken and stuck with. Reevaluate and think, and affect change if necessary so you can grow. It may be time to seek a mate or a reasonable facsimile within your cultural norms of an intimate, committed relationship.

Cheers !