I can't get over this overwhelming feeling of sadness

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Mayne

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2014
8,820
1,358
126
I just got a little video sent to me from older sister. Its only 45 seconds long and her eating hagen daz icecream..but at the end she realizes shes being filmed and laughs so hard and flips off the camera. This is the only video i have of her and I can't stop watching :) I feel better now.
 

PowerEngineer

Diamond Member
Oct 22, 2001
3,548
716
136
I just spent the last 4 hours with my nephew. I worry so much about this kid it ain't funny. He is far down this meth rabbit hole.

Perhaps you can make it your mission to help him climb out of that hole? Committing to make a positive difference in his life might make you feel better too. Just a thought... Good luck!
 

Red Squirrel

No Lifer
May 24, 2003
67,344
12,100
126
www.anyf.ca
I was depressed/suicidal for a number of years, self medicated with alcohol and drugs. Slowly but surely figured out drugs and alcohol make it worse along with diet, lack of sleep/proper exercise and attitude. When you get stuck in a shitty attitude of why whats the point of everything you use/drink, eat garbage to feel better, don't sleep, don't exercise. It just compounds everything because it makes you feel even worse so you keep indulging in more alcohol/junk food, cant sleep, don't want to move.

Maynes posted his diet on here plenty of times its terrible. Without proper nutrients your body needs of course you're going to feel terrible. Everybody knows you cant drink every day like mayne and expect to feel right, its poison to your body and mind. Ignore all that though and go see the doc for some happy pills to cover it all up, its the american way.


Yeah lifestyle and diet can play a big role. For me it was life style that made a big change but I was not really drinking much anyway, so I eliminated drinking completely while I was depressed to be on the safe side. I had a couple glasses of wine here and there when I was with family but not more than that. My biggest issue is I was always going to bed late and getting up late. I'm a night owl and I do work night shifts a lot which I like, but I was always staying in that mode instead of switching back on my off days. That means I was not getting any daylight, as the daylight period here is very short, basically between 9am and 4pm or so, for a good part of the year. So if I go to bed at 4am and get up at like 2-3pm, by the time I shower and everything it's like 4pm and already dark out. Doing this for months at a time catches up with you.

Basically, lack of daylight is what lead to it for me I think. It hit fast and hard. One day I was feeling kind of sad but did not know why, next day I wake up feeling sad, which got worse over the day and next day I'm basically bawling out and don't know why. This escalated up and downover the months and it was like a rollercoaster. But day 3 is when I realized I was going through depression and realized it may have been the lack of light. Went through counseling (at the time did not know what was wrong with me at all), got anti depressants, got off nights for a while, etc. I would go for more walks too, though the tail end of winter makes it hard because every walking surface is basically a mix of jagged ice, water, slush, snow and dog crap. I've learned to hate that time period. Basically March-May or so. One day it's freezing cold, the other day it feels like summer is here. The up and down really messes with mental health.

Now days I try to force myself to get up by 11, at least. I aim for 9-10. I set alarm for 9 and kind of play it by ear from there, sometimes I'll snooze but either way as long as I'm up, showered and ready before noon I find it actually helps my mood a lot. It's not just the daylight, but the idea of knowing that I have a full day ahead instead of it already being close to end of day.

Diet is still something I need to work on though, I don't eat the healthiest. I just hate cooking, don't know much about it, and just never have the motivation to try new recipes. A recipe book for me may as well be a service manual for a nuclear reactor. But yeah I really do need to push myself to cook more as I need to eat healthier while I'm ahead.
 
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nakedfrog

No Lifer
Apr 3, 2001
58,133
12,316
136
Perhaps you can make it your mission to help him climb out of that hole? Committing to make a positive difference in his life might make you feel better too. Just a thought... Good luck!
IDK, it took him a few years to get a meth head nephew out of his life last time (not sure if it was the same nephew)...
 
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Muadib

Lifer
May 30, 2000
17,916
838
126
I feel for you Mayne. I was the same when my brother died back in 2000. I saw someone for the depression, and it helped a lot. You owe it to yourself to at least try it.
 
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ultimatebob

Lifer
Jul 1, 2001
25,135
2,445
126
If the weed isn't working anymore, maybe you should do what all the Cool ATOT'ers are doing, any buy some Tesla stock and Bitcoin :)

Nothing like watching your life savings go up and down in value every day to bring some excitement to your life!
 

ultimatebob

Lifer
Jul 1, 2001
25,135
2,445
126
Honestly, I think that Mayne needs a hype man to praise his virtues to ATOT. You know, like I did for Brianmananan that one week. That dude was a virtual nobody until I turned him into the legend he is today!
 
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