So I was douching my hard drive tonight and came across these. Nothing like blanket rules to apply to 3 billion of the inhabitants of earth.
RULE 1: Chicks communicate in two modes: the way things are and the way they WISH things were. Whenever in doubt, assume it's the latter choice.
RULE 2: Chicks desire attention the same way that guys desire sex. Give attention sparingly. This is your currency.
RULE 3: Do not become so invested in any one girl that you cannot simply walk away.
RULE 4: Confidence attracts women even more than good looks. This is why you see fat, ugly, or dumpy guys with hot chicks.
RULE 5: Desperation repels chicks. You will attract more women when you don't care if you're attracting women.
RULE 6: After getting a girl's phone number, wait at least two days to call her to avoid appearing desperate.
RULE 7: Use the phone only to set up dates. Not to talk about weather, current events, how her day went, etc. Save that conversation for the date.
RULE 8: If you call a girl and get an answering machine, don't leave a message. Just try again another time. Girls, as a general rule, do not return phone calls.
RULE 9: First dates should be short and creative. NO "dinner and a movie". Things involving some activity are best: pool, bowling, roller blading, mini-golf, dancing, etc. Keep it FUN.
RULE 10: Do not give gifts early in the relationship. Doing so makes it appear as though you are attempting to purchase affection.
RULE 11: Girls will test guys to see how much they can get away with. Do not be tempted to give in. Speak your opinions, stand by your convictions, and don't put up with excessive amounts of bullshit.
RULE 12: A person can only take advantage of you as much as you let them.
RULE 13: There is no such thing as a "soulmate" or "the one". It doesn't exist. There are millions of girls out there, though, and many of them have the traits you are looking for in a girl.
RULE 14: Don't put any girl up on a pedestal. You risk not being able to reach her. Women are people too... or so I'm told.
RULE 15: If a girl disrespects you or your time, particularly early in the relationship, don't hesitate to get rid of her. NEXT!
RULE 16: No relationship is a committed one until both people agree that it is. Until then, anything is fair game for both parties involved.
RULE 17: Never be the one that says, "I love you" first.
RULE 18: The challenge is part of the fun. Don't short-change the girl. Let her pursue you. The harder something is to obtain, the more valuable it is perceived to be.
RULE 19: If a girl cheats on you, she is gone. No exceptions.
RULE 20: Never date a girl who has more problems than you do.
RULE 21: Do not date girls from work. Work is stressful enough.
RULE 22: Dating is a "numbers game". Accept the fact that you're going to get rejected more times than not. Suck it up and get back out there.
RULE 23: Getting advice about women from a woman is like asking Osama bin Laden to tell you the locations of all his terrorist camps.
RULE 24: Where women are concerned, pay more attention to what they do than what they say.
RULE 25: Realize that women are tricky, lying, manipulative, devious, scheming, sneaky, cunning, calculating, shrewd, and Machiavellian creatures. Love them anyway.
RULE 1: Chicks communicate in two modes: the way things are and the way they WISH things were. Whenever in doubt, assume it's the latter choice.
RULE 2: Chicks desire attention the same way that guys desire sex. Give attention sparingly. This is your currency.
RULE 3: Do not become so invested in any one girl that you cannot simply walk away.
RULE 4: Confidence attracts women even more than good looks. This is why you see fat, ugly, or dumpy guys with hot chicks.
RULE 5: Desperation repels chicks. You will attract more women when you don't care if you're attracting women.
RULE 6: After getting a girl's phone number, wait at least two days to call her to avoid appearing desperate.
RULE 7: Use the phone only to set up dates. Not to talk about weather, current events, how her day went, etc. Save that conversation for the date.
RULE 8: If you call a girl and get an answering machine, don't leave a message. Just try again another time. Girls, as a general rule, do not return phone calls.
RULE 9: First dates should be short and creative. NO "dinner and a movie". Things involving some activity are best: pool, bowling, roller blading, mini-golf, dancing, etc. Keep it FUN.
RULE 10: Do not give gifts early in the relationship. Doing so makes it appear as though you are attempting to purchase affection.
RULE 11: Girls will test guys to see how much they can get away with. Do not be tempted to give in. Speak your opinions, stand by your convictions, and don't put up with excessive amounts of bullshit.
RULE 12: A person can only take advantage of you as much as you let them.
RULE 13: There is no such thing as a "soulmate" or "the one". It doesn't exist. There are millions of girls out there, though, and many of them have the traits you are looking for in a girl.
RULE 14: Don't put any girl up on a pedestal. You risk not being able to reach her. Women are people too... or so I'm told.
RULE 15: If a girl disrespects you or your time, particularly early in the relationship, don't hesitate to get rid of her. NEXT!
RULE 16: No relationship is a committed one until both people agree that it is. Until then, anything is fair game for both parties involved.
RULE 17: Never be the one that says, "I love you" first.
RULE 18: The challenge is part of the fun. Don't short-change the girl. Let her pursue you. The harder something is to obtain, the more valuable it is perceived to be.
RULE 19: If a girl cheats on you, she is gone. No exceptions.
RULE 20: Never date a girl who has more problems than you do.
RULE 21: Do not date girls from work. Work is stressful enough.
RULE 22: Dating is a "numbers game". Accept the fact that you're going to get rejected more times than not. Suck it up and get back out there.
RULE 23: Getting advice about women from a woman is like asking Osama bin Laden to tell you the locations of all his terrorist camps.
RULE 24: Where women are concerned, pay more attention to what they do than what they say.
RULE 25: Realize that women are tricky, lying, manipulative, devious, scheming, sneaky, cunning, calculating, shrewd, and Machiavellian creatures. Love them anyway.
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