HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

[Descartes]

> > 1. AT LUNCH TIME, SIT IN YOUR PARKED CAR W/ SUNGLASSES ON AND POINT A
> >
> > HAIRDRYER AT PASSING CARS. SEE IF THEY SLOW DOWN.
> >
> > 2. PAGE YOURSELF OVER THE INTERCOM. DON'T DISGUISE YOUR VOICE.
> >
> > 3. EVERY TIME SOMEONE ASKS YOU TO DO SOMETHING, ASK IF THEY WANT FRIES
> > WITH THAT.
> >
> > 4. PUT YOUR GARBAGE CAN ON YOUR DESK AND LABEL IT "IN"
> >
> > 5. PUT DECAF IN THE COFFEE MAKER FOR 3 WEEKS. ONCE EVERYONE HAS GOTTEN
> > OVER THEIR CAFFEINE ADDICTIONS, SWITCH TO ESPRESSO.
> >
> > 6. WRITE "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS" IN THE MEMO LINE OF ALL YOUR CHECKS.
> >
> > 7. FINISH ALL YOUR SENTENCES WITH "IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY."
> >
> > 8. DONT USE ANY PUNCTUATION
> >
> > 9. AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE, SKIP RATHER THAN WALK.
> >
> > 10. ASK PEOPLE WHAT SEX THEY ARE. LAUGH HYSTERICALLY AFTER THEY
ANSWER.
> >
> >
> >
> > 11. SPECIFY THAT YOUR DRIVE-THROUGH ORDER IS "TO GO".
> >
> > 12. SING ALONG AT THE OPERA.
> >
> > 13. GO TO A POETRY RECITAL AND ASK WHY THE POEMS DON'T RHYME.
> >
> > 14. PUT MOSQUITO NETTING AROUND YOUR WORK AREA. PLAY A TAPE OF JUNGLE
> > SOUNDS ALL DAY.
> >
> > 15. FIVE DAYS IN ADVANCE, TELL YOUR FRIENDS YOU CAN'T ATTEND THEIR
> > PARTY
> > BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT IN THE MOOD.
> >
> > 16. HAVE YOUR COWORKERS ADDRESS YOU BY YOUR WRESTLING NAME, ROCK HARD
> > .
> >
> > 17. WHEN THE MONEY COMES OUT THE ATM, SCREAM "I WON!","I WON!" "3RD
> > TIME
> > THIS WEEK!!!!!
> >
> > 18. WHEN LEAVING THE ZOO, START RUNNING TOWARDS THE PARKING LOT,
> > YELLING
> > "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THEY'RE LOOSE!!"
> >
> > 19. TELL YOUR CHILDREN OVER DINNER, "DUE TO THE ECONOMY, WE ARE GOING
> > TO
> > HAVE TO LET ONE OF YOU GO."
> >
> > AND THE FINAL WAY TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY.......
> >
> > 20. SEND THIS E-MAIL TO EVERYONE IN YOUR ADDRESS BOOK, EVEN IF THEY
> > SENT
> > IT TO YOU OR ASKED YOU NOT TO SEND THEM STUFF LIKE THIS.

 

[StageLeft]

nice

 

[Fearlss1]

I like the "Write for sexual favors in all your checks
lol nice thnx for making me laff.
-=\nate/=-

 

[Tauren]

I've done #'s: 4, 11 and 19 before, but I definately have to try #17!

 

[bozo1]

I ALWAYS do #11.

 

[eakers]

actually when i do say "i won" when im at the bank machine and my balance is more than i expected.

*kat. <-- makes everything into a little game.

 

[frizzlefry]

hmmm.... i like ordering my cheeseburgers at mcdonalds, i tell them to hold the cheese. and i would like to have some diet water with that please....

 

[TheOmegaCode]

Ok, good list, but how the hell does that make you crazy. All that does is screw with the head of everyone around you.

 

[Descartes]

<< i would like to have some diet water with that please >>



good one, lol!



<< Ok, good list, but how the hell does that make you crazy >>



No idea, that was just the subject of the e-mail I received. I thought it was supposed to be, "how to keep a healthy level of sanity", but I kept the original subject.