How to Hire a Contractor (Another stolen Brutuskend JOKE)

[Brutuskend]

Three contractors were touring the White House on the same day. One was from Chicago, another from Missouri, and the third from Florida. At
the end of the tour, the guard asked them what they did for a living.

When they each replied that they were contractors the guard said "Hey, we need one of the rear fences redone. Why don't you guys look at it
and give me a bid." So to the back fence they went.

First up was the Florida contractor. He took out his tape measure and pencil, did some measuring and said, "Well I figure the job will run about
$900. $400 for materials, $400 for my crew, and $100 profit for me.

"Next was the Missouri contractor. He also took out his tape measure and pencil, did some quick figuring and said, "Looks like I can do this
Job for $700...$300 for materials, $300 for my crew, and $100 profit for me."

Then the guard asks the Chicago contractor how much. Without so much as moving the contractor says, $2700." The guard, incredulous, looks
at him and says "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"

"Easy" says the contractor from Chicago, "$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you and we hire the guy from Missouri."

 

[Amused]

:laugh:

 

[Syringer]

Old, but not bad.

 

[maddogchen]

hahahah 8/10

 

[new2AMD]

not bad

 

[DeeKnow]

nice... except the guy from Florida would probably show up late, speak only Spanish, do a lousy job and then try to overcharge you too...

 

[Ilmater]

Originally posted by: maddogchen
hahahah 8/10

 

[jEnus]

Originally posted by: DeeKnow
nice... except the guy from Florida would probably show up late, speak only Spanish, do a lousy job and then try to overcharge you too...

Deeknow - next time you see your father, kick him in the nuts, he failed you.

 

[So]

:beer:

 

[Mookow]

Originally posted by: Syringer
Old, but not bad.

Would you say it is as old as, say,... "SPIDER!"?

 

[brtspears2]

Originally posted by: jEnus

Originally posted by: DeeKnow
nice... except the guy from Florida would probably show up late, speak only Spanish, do a lousy job and then try to overcharge you too...

Deeknow - next time you see your father, kick him in the nuts, he failed you.

My landscaper is from Cuba and he is always late and always claim I owe him another $10 every week. He is suppose to blow the grass clippings away, but nope, leaves them on the pathways.

Not saying that all Cubans or landscapers in general are like this, but it rung a bell in my head.

 

[dquan97]

good one

 

[cain]

cha-ching

 

[KarenMarie]

8/10

 

[Abhi]

 

[Fenixgoon]

i dont get it.....

 

[waggy]

heh.

yeah chicago politics are a little dirty.

 

[raanemaan]

7/10

 

[ThePresence]

:thumbsup: Good one.

 

[jjones]

:beer:

 

[sillymofo]

You should add a fourth contractor, one from Texas that just got the job without bidding and get paid $5000 for it. :shocked:

 

[UnoSigmaPi]

HAHAHA

 

[oogabooga]

i enjoyed this joke 8/10

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: jEnus

Originally posted by: DeeKnow
nice... except the guy from Florida would probably show up late, speak only Spanish, do a lousy job and then try to overcharge you too...

Deeknow - next time you see your father, kick him in the nuts, he failed you.

not really, I have seen on many contractor rides, "We show up AND speak english!"

The only flaw was he should have stated SE Florida, but outside that save orlando it just doesn't matter anyway.

 

[ucdbiendog]

7/10