Have a copy of DeCSS
You must have a copy of the DeCSS source code. Nevermind that you wouldn't have the first clue about how to actually make use of it. That's not important. Copying a DVD will cost you about 3 times as much as buying it, yes, that's true. And the source code is way above your head and you can't understand any of it. Don't ask questions. Get the DeCSS source. You'll need it to be l33t.
Have to hate AOL
You absolutely have to hate AOL. All things lame have something to do with AOL. If you have AOL, cancel. AND NO, "I USE IT AS MY BACKUP ISP" IS NOT AN ACCEPTABLE REASON TO REMAIN AN AOL CUSTOMER. You cannot be l33t and use AOL. Don't ask why, I don't know either. That's just the talk going around on IRC. AOL is lame, and you have to hate it.
Your computer is a "box"
It is no longer acceptable to refer to your computer as a machine, workstation, CPU, PC, server, etc. Your computer is a "box". And you must refer to your computer as a box at all times.
Be An Arrogant Bullshitter
This is a biggie. You must, without a doubt, be an arrogant bullshitter to be l33t. Being arrogant on its own is not enough, nor is bullshitting in a nice way, if you can. You have to be a prickface when you bullshit. DONUT FUK W1TH ME, OR I WILL PACKET J00 B1TCH. Call everyone a bitch a lot, too. But most important, credible bullshit isn't bullshit. You have to make your claims so radical and amazing, that people will think your l33t just for the quality of your arrogant bullshit.
FREE KEVIN
It doesn't matter that Kevin is already free. He'll never TRUELY be free. That's your story, and you're sticking to it. Keep your FREE KEVIN sticker on your webpage for the rest of your life.
Shell account
If you don't have a shell account, get one. And NO, your own little Linux box (see? box.) on your ADSL doesn't count. How are you supposed to packet from that? Get real. Get a shell account from a provider that has 4 OC3s all to themselves. They all do these days. Just ask them.
Everything Microsoft Does Sucks
Microsoft is not l33t. Everything they do sucks, everybody knows that. It is helpful if you view Microsoft as an enemy army of some kind. I know, I know - you use Windows. BUT THAT'S OKAY. You can blame that on your parents or because all the good games are for Windows. Why anyone uses Microsoft Office is beyond you, because everything Microsoft does sucks. To be l33t, you cannot praise anything Microsoft does; ever. (but it's ok to own Microsoft stock, because let's face it they make mucho cash - but they still suck)
Deep Down You Must Believe BSD Is Superior To Linux
If you are not a BSD or Linux user, then this one will be easy. Just take our word for it that the truely el33t use BSD and not Linux. If you're a Linux user, you have to access that place deep deep down. You know where I'm talking about, that one little place in your heart that you don't talk about at parties. The place where those doubts about yourself creep in, where you feel (secretly) that FreeBSD and OpenBSD are too intimidating, so you use Linux. You have to access that part and feel deep down inside that BSD is in fact technically superior to Linux. Even just a little bit. And you don't have to tell anyone.
Your Sony Playstation Must Have A Modchip
This one is blatently obvious. Your Sony Playstation absolutely MUST have a modchip. I mean come on. I aint even gotta explain this one. If you own a Playstation (PSX), and you want to be l33t, go get the modchip installed. Goddamn.
You Have To Be Trying To Get Your MCSE
Even though you're well aware that everything Microsoft does sucks, you still have to be studying to try to get your MCSE. Even if you already have your MCSE, you still have to be trying to get it. Everyone who is l33t is working on their MCSE. That's just one of those ironies in life.
l33t haX0rs must download warez
Even if they never install it. Things like mechanical engineering schematic programs and nuclear physicist modeling programs are also necessary even if they have no possible relevence to anything you might ever be interested in. You are also required to have at least one BETA operating system installed -- losers use final versions.
Wonder how many Anandtech members fit that description
[[edit]]
added your submission
You must have a copy of the DeCSS source code. Nevermind that you wouldn't have the first clue about how to actually make use of it. That's not important. Copying a DVD will cost you about 3 times as much as buying it, yes, that's true. And the source code is way above your head and you can't understand any of it. Don't ask questions. Get the DeCSS source. You'll need it to be l33t.
Have to hate AOL
You absolutely have to hate AOL. All things lame have something to do with AOL. If you have AOL, cancel. AND NO, "I USE IT AS MY BACKUP ISP" IS NOT AN ACCEPTABLE REASON TO REMAIN AN AOL CUSTOMER. You cannot be l33t and use AOL. Don't ask why, I don't know either. That's just the talk going around on IRC. AOL is lame, and you have to hate it.
Your computer is a "box"
It is no longer acceptable to refer to your computer as a machine, workstation, CPU, PC, server, etc. Your computer is a "box". And you must refer to your computer as a box at all times.
Be An Arrogant Bullshitter
This is a biggie. You must, without a doubt, be an arrogant bullshitter to be l33t. Being arrogant on its own is not enough, nor is bullshitting in a nice way, if you can. You have to be a prickface when you bullshit. DONUT FUK W1TH ME, OR I WILL PACKET J00 B1TCH. Call everyone a bitch a lot, too. But most important, credible bullshit isn't bullshit. You have to make your claims so radical and amazing, that people will think your l33t just for the quality of your arrogant bullshit.
FREE KEVIN
It doesn't matter that Kevin is already free. He'll never TRUELY be free. That's your story, and you're sticking to it. Keep your FREE KEVIN sticker on your webpage for the rest of your life.
Shell account
If you don't have a shell account, get one. And NO, your own little Linux box (see? box.) on your ADSL doesn't count. How are you supposed to packet from that? Get real. Get a shell account from a provider that has 4 OC3s all to themselves. They all do these days. Just ask them.
Everything Microsoft Does Sucks
Microsoft is not l33t. Everything they do sucks, everybody knows that. It is helpful if you view Microsoft as an enemy army of some kind. I know, I know - you use Windows. BUT THAT'S OKAY. You can blame that on your parents or because all the good games are for Windows. Why anyone uses Microsoft Office is beyond you, because everything Microsoft does sucks. To be l33t, you cannot praise anything Microsoft does; ever. (but it's ok to own Microsoft stock, because let's face it they make mucho cash - but they still suck)
Deep Down You Must Believe BSD Is Superior To Linux
If you are not a BSD or Linux user, then this one will be easy. Just take our word for it that the truely el33t use BSD and not Linux. If you're a Linux user, you have to access that place deep deep down. You know where I'm talking about, that one little place in your heart that you don't talk about at parties. The place where those doubts about yourself creep in, where you feel (secretly) that FreeBSD and OpenBSD are too intimidating, so you use Linux. You have to access that part and feel deep down inside that BSD is in fact technically superior to Linux. Even just a little bit. And you don't have to tell anyone.
Your Sony Playstation Must Have A Modchip
This one is blatently obvious. Your Sony Playstation absolutely MUST have a modchip. I mean come on. I aint even gotta explain this one. If you own a Playstation (PSX), and you want to be l33t, go get the modchip installed. Goddamn.
You Have To Be Trying To Get Your MCSE
Even though you're well aware that everything Microsoft does sucks, you still have to be studying to try to get your MCSE. Even if you already have your MCSE, you still have to be trying to get it. Everyone who is l33t is working on their MCSE. That's just one of those ironies in life.
l33t haX0rs must download warez
Even if they never install it. Things like mechanical engineering schematic programs and nuclear physicist modeling programs are also necessary even if they have no possible relevence to anything you might ever be interested in. You are also required to have at least one BETA operating system installed -- losers use final versions.
Wonder how many Anandtech members fit that description
[[edit]]
added your submission
Facebook
Twitter