How screwed am I

lupi

Lifer
Apr 8, 2001
32,539
260
126
Left for work this morning and I had 0 trees on the property.

Get home and I now have 2.
 

shortylickens

No Lifer
Jul 15, 2003
80,287
17,080
136
It means in the next couple days somebody will be unearthing them and leaving big dirt piles on your lawn.
 

Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Oct 9, 1999
46,763
10,356
146
Don't worry. Their bark is no worse than your plight.
 

Scarpozzi

Lifer
Jun 13, 2000
26,391
1,780
126
Are they on your house or any of your belongings? If not, you're probably not that screwed. In the event that a neighbor's tree falls on your house, car, cat, or child...basically it's your house, car, cat or child insurance that's going to pay to have them repaired....and your copay, deductables. Unless you have a written request for the neighbor to remove the trees or to prove neglegence somehow...
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Screwed? Depends on TWO things. The first has been mentioned already: did it damage anything? If not, there's still a chance that you're screwed:

Are you a wussy/pansy/metrosexual who has no man card and needs a manual to figure out how to use a screwdriver? If so, then, you're screwed.

A real man would think, "Hey! Firewood! I'll go out and buy a chainsaw!" If that wasn't among your first thoughts, then perhaps you need to go to a research university to be studied. A freak of nature! Someone with two x-chromosomes and a penis.
 

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,973
6,336
136
Screwed? Depends on TWO things. The first has been mentioned already: did it damage anything? If not, there's still a chance that you're screwed:

Are you a wussy/pansy/metrosexual who has no man card and needs a manual to figure out how to use a screwdriver? If so, then, you're screwed.

A real man would think, "Hey! Firewood! I'll go out and buy a chainsaw!" If that wasn't among your first thoughts, then perhaps you need to go to a research university to be studied. A freak of nature! Someone with two x-chromosomes and a penis.
:D


the sig is helping.
 

lupi

Lifer
Apr 8, 2001
32,539
260
126
1 broke mostly clean and the top half is now sitting upside down on the yard. The other I haven't fully been able to determine yet as it, or some portion of it, came down across the hedge row and seems to be currently straddled into both yards.

Firewood would have been nice as a kid, but doesn't work so well in the gas furnace that only see 2.5 months of use a year.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
1 broke mostly clean and the top half is now sitting upside down on the yard. The other I haven't fully been able to determine yet as it, or some portion of it, came down across the hedge row and seems to be currently straddled into both yards.

Firewood would have been nice as a kid, but doesn't work so well in the gas furnace that only see 2.5 months of use a year.

*sigh*
You could have a nice firepit in the back yard, have a little camp fire, roast some hot dogs, roast some marshmallows, and drink some beer. Don't forget to invite the neighbor over for a few beers.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Alternatively, you could purchase a cheap chain saw, like a Poulan, cut up the tree for firewood, cut up the part that's on your neighbor's property (have him help you), enjoy a few beers, and put an ad on Craigslist for firewood, recouping the expense of your new tool.

But, alas, you'll probably sit inside the house, with the apron still tied around your waist from doing the dishes, sipping on a glass of white zinfandel, watching the workmen who you hired to cut up the tree for you; oblivious to the fact that as your wife is sipping on her glass of white zinfandel while also watching the work crew, she'll be secretly thinking, "I wish I had such a manly man."

edit: is your wife hot? I have a couple of chain saws & can come over if you live close enough. Pics?
 

lupi

Lifer
Apr 8, 2001
32,539
260
126
If the seemingly annual burn ban hasn't gone into effect yet it can't be far off. and with it nicely in the 80/80's, we'd be the ones roasting. at least large quantities of bear would possible convince the mosquito flocks to stay at bay.
 

lupi

Lifer
Apr 8, 2001
32,539
260
126
yeah, I've already spent many a summer weekend out in the forest of a relatives property stacking up firewood for the winter. long past that mancard requirement.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
yeah, I've already spent many a summer weekend out in the forest of a relatives property stacking up firewood for the winter. long past that mancard requirement.

Yet, you're oblivious as to whether you're screwed or not in regard to taking care of the tree??
 

lupi

Lifer
Apr 8, 2001
32,539
260
126
Until firmly dashed I'm still holding out for the glimmer of hope that the neighbor decides to take care of it.
 
Sep 12, 2004
16,852
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A real man would think, "Hey! Firewood! I'll go out and buy a chainsaw!" If that wasn't among your first thoughts, then perhaps you need to go to a research university to be studied. A freak of nature! Someone with two x-chromosomes and a penis.
A real man wouldn't need to buy a chainsaw. He already owns one.
 

EagleKeeper

Discussion Club Moderator<br>Elite Member
Staff member
Oct 30, 2000
42,589
5
0
Cross cut and axe - why burn gas with a chainsaw?