How long can guy next door park his car in front of my house before I get to bash it in with a bat legally?

[SaltyNuts]

Motherfucker does not like me for some reason. I think its because I'm a big good looking guy and he is some scrawny nerdy guy and his wife digs me. I never porked her, never tried to porked her, don't even really look at her except when she tries to talk to me, I exchange pleasantries then get the fuck out of there as soon as I can because I have better things to do.

Anyways, this loser doesn't like me. So he's been parking his car in front of my house every day. Now, his whole driveway is open, and he has no cars parked in front of HIS house. He just parks his car in front of my house because he thinks it makes me mad. But I don't get mad, I get even. Fuck that motherfucker.

Can I legally smash it at this point? That is COMPLETE bullshit if he could get away with something like this and not face the car-smash consequences...

 

[lxskllr]

Put a bar of pube soap on his windshield. He'll get the message.

 

[pete6032]

Ah yes the suburbs. Where homeowners believe they own the public property in front of their homes....

 

[Brainonska511]

You don't own the street space in front of your house. What's the big deal? I hope he keeps parking in front of your house on the public street to spite you.

 

[brianmanahan]

But I don't get mad, I get even.

you sound a little mad

maybe park your car in front of his house as retribution. fight fire with fire, as they say.

Can I legally smash it at this point?

i read the laws for a couple minutes and couldn't find a definitive answer

but IANAL

 

[Red Squirrel]

It's public property so not really anything you can do. I don't even think you can get it towed. If you want to be very petty about it though you can lookup bylaws, there is probably something that is being violated, like being within a certain distance of the curb, or a driveway, or a lamp post etc... Cities tend to have a crazy number of unknown bylaws that can be dug up to suit almost any situation. That would be the ultimate karen thing to do though so you're going to need to get the matching haircut.

 

[bba_tcg]

Just park in front of his house.

 

[brianmanahan]

It's public property so not really anything you can do.

except for post like a tough guy on ATOT!

 

[BudAshes]

Sprinkle bird seed all over it.

 

[brianmanahan]

Ah yes the suburbs. Where homeowners believe they own the public property in front of their homes....

this is why i prefer rural areas, where it's not legal to park on the road unless you're working on something temporarily

certainly no overnight parking is allowed

 

[Dr. Detroit]

remove his valve stems!

Sugar in his tank!

Coat his windshield in Vaseline!

On a hot summers day pour a can of coke on is his roof!

 

[biostud]

Try this: Hi neighbor, not that it matters to me, but I was just wondering if there is a particular reason for you to park in front of my house?

 

[Newbian]

You have to pee on the spot to claim it so the next time the car is not there do that in front of everyone so they know it's your property now.

 

[UsandThem]

Make him watch you have sex with his car.

Spoiler

Afterwards, take it out for gallon margaritas.

 

[VirtualLarry]

Get a "portable" fire hydrant. When he parks in front of your house, subtly install said fire hydrant. Take pics. Send pics to appropriate authorities.

 

[Lost_in_the_HTTP]

Well, there are ways .....

 

[igor_kavinski]

Invite both of them to dinner. You can say things about women that might turn his woman off and he might feel good that he is better than you.

 

[Iron Woode]

salting in a postynuts thread

 

[Exterous]

You have to pee on the spot to claim it so the next time the car is not there do that in front of everyone so they know it's your property now.

Better yet pee on the car so it becomes yours. Then demand the keys and park it anywhere you want

 

[sdifox]

Maybe you should buy him a gallon of takeout margarita from taco hut?

 

[MrSquished]

Suburban people are funny. There's always a car parked in front of my place that isn't mine and yet life moves on just fine.

 

[SKORPI0]

Sprinkle bird seed all over it.

Salted nuts would be much better.

 

[pete6032]

I have lived in the core city where a bajillion people park in front of my home, a, d the suburbs where no one parks in fro

this is why i prefer rural areas, where it's not legal to park on the road unless you're working on something temporarily

certainly no overnight parking is allowed

Don't you live in LA or something?

 

[lxskllr]

The house next to me is like a used car lot. Driveway full, and cars in the street. There's more cars in the street in general, cause people are more frivolous than they used to be, and have too many cars. I find it annoying as shit, cause they eliminate two way traffic, and make you organize passage. I wouldn't complain with the intent of someone forcing them to park in their driveways, but I still bitch about it every time I have to maneuver around their cars to get in and out.

 

[Captante]

I say grab a crow-bar and go to town on his windshield right now.... what's the worst that could happen?

*(either that or wait till after dark and stuff a large raw potato into the exhaust-pipe!)