How does marriage thing work?

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Philippine Mango

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Oct 29, 2004
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Meaning that lets say you have the ceremony etc. but then you realize you're not meant for each other, do you have to get a divorce? Don't you need a marriage license though which would require going to the courts and being officially married? I'm a bit confused on all of this. I'm wondering b/c I heard the shortest marriage was something like 6 hours and then they had to get a divorce. Maybe you just pretend you didn't have the ceremony??? I dunno:confused:
 
K1052

K1052

Elite Member
Aug 21, 2003
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You should have a prenup anyway so what does it matter.

Love is all nice and dandy but people should learn to face reality.

*flamesuit on*
*lowers concrete blast shield*
*starts sprinklers*


 
J

jlbenedict

Banned
Jul 10, 2005
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Originally posted by: K1052
You should have a prenup anyway so what does it matter.

Love is all nice and dandy but people should learn to face reality.

*flamesuit on*
*lowers concrete blast shield*
*starts sprinklers*
Click to expand...

Right on.. and the reality is: divorce rate is something like 50'somethin %.
Actually, on the radio this morning, it was mentioned that there are more unmarried households than married households in the U.S. today.


 
CaptnKirk

CaptnKirk

Lifer
Jul 25, 2002
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Well, first of all - you have to retreive your balls back from the mason jar full of formaldahyde that they go into immediatley upon marraige.
 
D

DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
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Originally posted by: jlbenedict
Right on.. and the reality is: divorce rate is something like 50'somethin %.
Actually, on the radio this morning, it was mentioned that there are more unmarried households than married households in the U.S. today.
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That is just sad. :( Studies have linked higher male aggression and recklessness (lawlessness) to single parent families.
 
P

Philippine Mango

Diamond Member
Oct 29, 2004
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Originally posted by: jlbenedict
Annulment
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I realize that that is an option but that still doesn't explain my question.

Originally posted by: DaShen
Originally posted by: jlbenedict
Right on.. and the reality is: divorce rate is something like 50'somethin %.
Actually, on the radio this morning, it was mentioned that there are more unmarried households than married households in the U.S. today.
Click to expand...

That is just sad. :( Studies have linked higher male aggression and recklessness (lawlessness) to single parent families.
Click to expand...

Explains why my parents are still married, hmmm....
 
lokiju

lokiju

Lifer
May 29, 2003
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When you get married with a ceremony you have a person that is legally allowed to marry people.

As the bride and groom you go beforehand to the courthouse and apply for your marriage license, you bring those paid for and filled out papers with you to the ceremony and after the marriage is performed, the person that did it will sign those forms and have them mailed in.

A few weeks later you'll receive your official copy of your marriage license.

For those that say they only lasted 6 hours, I'd guess they never actually even sent in the paper work and legally speaking were never technically married.

 
P

piasabird

Lifer
Feb 6, 2002
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Well there are no two people that are meant for each other. The reality is that in any marriage, there is the battle of wills. Even the best marriage is nothing more than a compromise. There is no marriage on earth where the prince runs off with the pricess and they live happily ever after.

Marriage is what you make it. If either party wants to make life a living hell, then it will be a living hell!

So if you get married the idea is to know this other person long enough to know what they are like. Just because you spend one night in the sack and you liked it, that does not mean a marriage will work out. It takes more than animal magnetism to make a good marriage. You might find out you are married to the black widow and she wants to consume you alive after she get what she wants.

So with marriage you need to concentrate less on Sex and more on personality. It is odd how totally opposite people get together and they have a lasting marriage. Maybe a bossy controlling person needs a meek, wimp to make them whole. No marriage will work unless both parties are interested in compromising in such a way as to make it work. Marriage does not work well for stingy Me Me Me people.
 
S

SpecialEd

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Jul 18, 2001
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the ceremony means nothing in the eyes of the law. The government recognizes your marriage when you and your spouse walk into the local gov office and apply for your marriage license. The license then needs to be signed by an official and at least two witnesses. Once everything is processed, the marriage is a legal contract.

edit: lokiju basically answered the question
 
ElFenix

ElFenix

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Mar 20, 2000
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Originally posted by: SpecialEd
the ceremony means nothing in the eyes of the law. The government recognizes your marriage when you and your spouse walk into the local gov office and apply for your marriage license. The license then needs to be signed by an official and at least two witnesses. Once everything is processed, the marriage is a legal contract.

edit: lokiju basically answered the question
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in Texas, you're supposed to get a marriage license, then wait 3 days for a 'cooling off' period, but if you don't get the marriage license you're still married.
 
P

Philippine Mango

Diamond Member
Oct 29, 2004
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Originally posted by: lokiju

For those that say they only lasted 6 hours, I'd guess they never actually even sent in the paper work and legally speaking were never technically married.
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It was on the discovery channel and it happened in the 20s or 30s, (early 20th century).

Originally posted by: SpecialEd
the ceremony means nothing in the eyes of the law. The government recognizes your marriage when you and your spouse walk into the local gov office and apply for your marriage license. The license then needs to be signed by an official and at least two witnesses. Once everything is processed, the marriage is a legal contract.

edit: lokiju basically answered the question
Click to expand...

What if you have no friends?
 
dullard

dullard

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May 21, 2001
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In many states, the minute the paperwork is signed, you are married.

The divorce process, however, often takes months. Many states have minimum mandatory waiting periods. The 6 hour time was probably the time from the marriage ceremony until someone filed for divorce. The divorce probably wasn't final for months later though. Thus, they were probably technically married for several months. The 6 hour figure is what media likes to use, because in practice, that is the amout of time they spent together.
 
A

Alex

Diamond Member
Oct 26, 1999
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Originally posted by: jlbenedict
Originally posted by: K1052
You should have a prenup anyway so what does it matter.

Love is all nice and dandy but people should learn to face reality.

*flamesuit on*
*lowers concrete blast shield*
*starts sprinklers*
Click to expand...

Right on.. and the reality is: divorce rate is something like 50'somethin %.
Actually, on the radio this morning, it was mentioned that there are more unmarried households than married households in the U.S. today.
Click to expand...

id personally never get married to someone i wouldnt wanna spend the rest of my life with but sh!t happens so i dunno best be safe than sorry!
 
4

49erinnc

Platinum Member
Feb 10, 2004
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Originally posted by: dullard

The divorce process, however, often takes months. Many states have minimum mandatory waiting periods.
Click to expand...

No kidding. Went through it this year. Here in NC, you cannot even file for divorce until one full year of separation. "Separation" here basically refers to when both spouses chose to live separately from each other. If at some point during that year, you wound up in bed together for a night, the year wait starts over unless you both lie on the forms. My full year of separation ended on May 20, 2006. At that point, I had go to the courthouse and fill out some papework, pay my fee ($150) and issue for papers for to be served. In my county, they have up to 60 days to serve papers. For me, it took about 45 days before they were actually served. From that date, I had to wait a mandantory 30 days before I could go back to the courthouse and get my court date. That was around the middle of July. Then at that point, I got my court date which was another 3-4 weeks away. And if it's not contested by the other spouse, then only after all of this is your divorce granted. And if you screw up on any date within all of the very lengthy forms, it can all be toss out the window and you have to get another court date.

In a nutshell, it took me from May 20th to August 3rd to have my divorce finalized, after a full year of separation. It's not easy but that's a good thing because it certainly gives you time to do everything you can to save the marriage or at least realize that it wasn't meant to be. Too bad that they don't make it just as hard to get married. Maybe the divorce rate wouldn't be so high if they did. IMO, too many couples get married before truly knowing the other person. You may think you know them but it takes a LONG time to fully understand your compatibilities and incompatibilities, once the novelty of the relationship wears off.

 
Fern

Fern

Elite Member
Sep 30, 2003
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How does marriage thing work?
Click to expand...

When somebody finds, let the rest of us guys know................



Been married about 15 yrs, still don't know.

Fern
 
K

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
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Originally posted by: K1052
You should have a prenup anyway so what does it matter.

Love is all nice and dandy but people should learn to face reality.

*flamesuit on*
*lowers concrete blast shield*
*starts sprinklers*
Click to expand...

Why would you think that you need a flame suit.

The innocent bliss of marriage is wonderful if both sides are young, just starting out, or if they are both of equal financial standing. Other than that... a prenup is a very smart thing.

 
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