How do you handle bank accounts with your SO?

[Exterous]

It came to mine while I was having lunch with some friends. When the bill came there was a brief discussion about which one was going to pay for the meal. They've been married for 8 years. My wife and I have joint accounts. So do you guys have separate accounts, joint accounts or some mix in between?

 

[momeNt]

cash under the mattress, we sleep on separate twin beds. So I guess that falls under separate?

 

[highland145]

Where is the 'It's all her money" option?

Her $$ is her $$
My $$ is her $$

 

[lxskllr]

Separate when I was still married. Didn't matter much since I paid for almost everything, but I like keeping everybody's stuff with them. Better to keep money separate.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

One joint account for paying the house. Both of us put a given % of our paychecks into here... my wife deposits a given % to her personal biggy bank savings. The rest goes to a "main" account in my name that is used for paying bills, credit card statements, or transferred to a savings account.

But... overall.. I manage all the funds anyways So even if it's in my wife's name - I move funds around all the time because she doesn't want to handle banking stuff.

We never have issues because neither of us are spending whores in the slightest, and overall our bank funds only ever go up - never down.

 

[highland145]

Joint accounts but separate banks. When I opened here, I got a business account at the bank across the street because it's convenient. I handed her the joint checkbook because I wasn't getting paid any time soon. When I did start getting a check, it was convenient to have it across the street but it's joint. We just don't spend out of each others account. I have no idea how much $$ she has and visa versa.

 

[zinfamous]

so, about those necrotic trust issues....

 

[mikeymikec]

We both pay a standard amount into a joint account every month that covers the standard utility bills and mortgage. In theory that account should be emptied at the end of each month, but in practice I leave some spare in there just in case say the telephone bill is higher than usual.
We have a joint credit card for 'us' purchases (e.g. supermarket bills).
We both have our own bank accounts which our earnings are paid into and individual expenses like my mobile phone bill come out of my own account.
Joint savings account that I pay whatever I can spare (I'm self-employed) into and she pays a standard amount into.

 

[ponyo]

So everyone paid for their own meal? Who's idea was it to meet for lunch? That person should've paid for everyone.

 

[Squisher]

We're 36 years in as a couple. She's likely to stick.

I handle all expenses because I'm better at it and way back when I was an early adopter of internet investment, banking, and bill payment which made it so much easier.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

We're 36 years in as a couple. She's likely to stick.

I handle all expenses because I'm better at it and way back when I was an early adopter of internet investment, banking, and bill payment which made it so much easier.

Basically the same - my wife hated the work - hated opening the mail... So I took it all over... including managing all the money.

 

[Red Squirrel]

If I was married, what I'd want to do is just setup like $1,200 per pay or so to go into a shared account, then setup all the bills to come out from that account. Any money left over in that account after a few years could then be used for misc stuff like trips or unexpected expenses etc. Our individual accounts would then be for our own personal spending.

 

[JM Aggie08]

All shared. Split would be absurd.

 

[soulcougher73]

Spectate accounts. She transfers her paychecks to mine. We pay for everything on Joint CC. I pay the bills.

 

[Stopsignhank]

All the money goes into one big pot and we use that for living.

 

[Scarpozzi]

Separate accounts, but not just trust issues.

You see, I'm the male, but not the breadwinner. My wife makes double my salary. When we started out, I was paying our mortgage and rent for the apartment we had in another city where she went to grad school. I stayed with her weekends, etc... When she got her job, her number one priority was to pay off her $90k of college debt ASAP. So she focused on that and her reward was buying a brand new SUV when she finished paying off her loans....then her reward was becoming the mother of my kids. All the while, I concentrated on paying on the house and household expenses.

After kids were born, she's been paying 1. retirement catch up 2. day care costs 3. 529 (college fund contributions) and most-importantly 4. vacation funding

She's also taken on some construction loan payments on our house and is paying on a minivan we bought. My point is, we have split accounts, but we manage our own pools of money and both are concentrating on paying down debt and saving at a crazy rate....while going on vacations and enjoying life as much as we can while being really responsible with the stuff that counts.

I'm hoping we'll have our house paid off in 5 years time. I know we'll definitely have our short term loans zapped by then...only 1.25 years of day care payments left...then things will get cheaper. At one point, we were paying $1400/month in day care. Now it's closer to $850 I won't mind combining our accounts after we get things paid off. For now, I like having them separated because we get paid on different schedules and some months, I lock my spending to compensate for seasonal expenses. (timeshare maintenance fees, NFL season tickets, etc...)

 

[Red Squirrel]

Holy crap 90k college debt I can't even fathom that. That is almost a mortgage. Hope she's a brain surgeon or something.

 

[GagHalfrunt]

What's hers is hers and what's mine is hers.

 

[Oyeve]

When I was married I insisted we had separate everything. Was a smart move as she rang up over 60k in CC bills. We divorced and she filed bankruptcy. With my girlfriend now and even tho we mostly live together everything is separate. She pays her stuff I pay mine. The only thing we split is the car payments and thats done in cash.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

When I was married I insisted we had separate everything. Was a smart move as she rang up over 60k in CC bills. We divorced and she filed bankruptcy. With my girlfriend now and even tho we mostly live together everything is separate. She pays her stuff I pay mine. The only thing we split is the car payments and thats done in cash.

Hope you had a prenup else I presume that $60k debt because half yours?

 

[KeithTalent]

Separate accounts for the day to day, but each of us put a certain amount aside into a joint account each month for savings. Seems to work well for us, but everyone is different.

KT

 

[Jeeebus]

Joint tenancy by the entireties - if your state has it, look into it as it's the cheapest/laziest form of asset protection available. Someone gets a judgment against me? Too bad, it's all her money too and you can't touch it. Vice versa.

 

[Oyeve]

Hope you had a prenup else I presume that $60k debt because half yours?

Of course I did.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

Of course I did.

Smart man.

I'm guessing she had that debt prior to you getting married, correct? IIRC, regardless of having a prenup everything that happens AFTER marriage is both of your responsibilities?

 

[Oyeve]

Smart man.

I'm guessing she had that debt prior to you getting married, correct? IIRC, regardless of having a prenup everything that happens AFTER marriage is both of your responsibilities?

The reasons we divorced were all her faults. Totally uncontested and I stipulated her debt created during the marriage was completely her own. She could not fight it and gladly signed away. She had no choice.