Hi all,
I can only confirm (our Admin's name here) appraisal and his sensitivity to verb usage.
I'd long been thinking that someone was 'wringing' our traffic (sorry
for slipping that note under your door, O'Keefe), but 'throttling' is
a much more accurate way of describing it. I never thought Comcast
would stoop to throttling, though. I also have to admit responsibility
for much of the P2P traffic in the last couple of months, it's just
that I needed them for a term paper that I was writing. Unfortunately I
also used the printer in the computer room to print off a couple of
ddos (Manoj, is this going to cause further problems?). Come to think
of it that would actually account for much of the toner usage last
semester. Anyway I think I can actually make a small contribution to
this ongoing problem by offering the following Internet port
guidelines, which I suggest we follow with zeal until (our Admin's name here) hits upon a
long term solution:
(1) Always, but ALWAYS, use Port 1 when using the Internet
(2) Except if the thermostat in your room is set between 65-70, then go
ahead and use port 2.
(3) Those of us (myself included) who are still unable to convert from
Fahrenheit to Celsius should use port 3, except on Tuesday mornings
between 9:30 and 9:34, when internet use is forbidden.
Please memorize these guidelines, and you should be all set, just as
long as you pay attention to the following exceptions:
(4) If you are on the Internet and hear Alice or Stu's voice in the
hallway, please switch to port 4.
(5) If an immediate family member calls you on Skype, please answer 'howdy' and switch to port 5.
(6) Whenever India wins a cricket match it would be safest to use port 6
for the next couple of days.
(7) Unsere deutschspragigen Bewohner duerfen auf keinen Fall Port 7 benutzen.
(8) Port 8, for reasons that Rick can explain, is known as the 'mashed potato port,' and should be used for one hour on those evenings in which two portions of dessert
have been consumed.
Ok, that's about it. A big thanks to Admin for working hard to improve
our Internet. And in the meantime....happy and safe surfing,
Steve.
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