how do i harden my stool?

[Schadenfroh]

what do i have to eat, wiping takes too much time

 

[conjur]

You know...a 9mm round to the head would end your worries of spending an extra minute on throne.

 

[Pepsi90919]

NOES!!!!!!!!11111111 BAD MENTAL IMAGE

 

[Spoooon]

You can just hold it in as long as possible. The longer you hold it in, the drier it gets.