Hillarious game reviews

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brikis98

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2005
7,253
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MmmSkyscraper

MmmSkyscraper

Diamond Member
Jul 6, 2004
9,472
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76
The Big Rigs review is brilliant.

Stuart Campbell was the best reviewer of all time, I think he wrote for Amiga Format. His sarcasm and sense of humour were epic. He was the first Yahtzee.
 
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CP5670

Diamond Member
Jun 24, 2004
5,660
762
126
The Big Rigs one is my favorite. I think that game actually sold reasonably well despite the reviews. Maybe people wanted to buy it because it was so bad. :D
 
TehMac

TehMac

Diamond Member
Aug 18, 2006
9,976
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71
Originally posted by: Drako
Originally posted by: BladeVenom
One of the funniest reviews, http://youtube.com/watch?v=pi8n6uN091E
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"I'm surrounded by blown Kha'ak, and not satisfied" Hilarious :).
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Yeah lol, that was pretty classic, but she was about to laugh. I'm surprised G4TV hosted that, with all the young audience; Although maybe they're not so young anymore.

I think one of the funnier lines was not related to the game: "a Kha'ak has attacked the ship, penetrating the insides and sending seamen everywhere; it's very messy."
 
Praxis1452

Praxis1452

Platinum Member
Jan 31, 2006
2,197
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swarms of kha'ak ready to engage. Unfortunately the kha'ak lack staying power at this point. Look how fast they explode.
 
ConstipatedVigilante

ConstipatedVigilante

Diamond Member
Feb 22, 2006
7,670
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"Julian, help! I can't get the Kha'ak off of me!"

Great games (X2/X3), but those germans really need to check up on English slang before getting voice actors. When I first told my friends the newest game I was playing and the storyline, they asked what the aliens were called. I was like, "uh...the...Cake?"
 
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CP5670

Diamond Member
Jun 24, 2004
5,660
762
126
Anyone remember Extreme Paintbrawl? That game was infamous for its bad reviews back in the late 90s.
 
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nsafreak

Diamond Member
Oct 16, 2001
7,093
3
81
There was a mud racing game that PC Gamer reviewed and it was hilarious. I don't remember the entire review but I remember it started something like, "I'd rather duct tape raw steaks to my ass, cover myself with honey and then jump in a cage with hungry rabid grizzly bears than to play this game. It'd actually be more fun."

Hehe I found PC Gamer's review of eXtreem Paintbrawl in their archives, here's a funny quote from it:

Sadly, this sporadic confusion extends to your teammates, whose behavior has been realistically modeled after the characters in One Flew Over the Cuckoo?s Nest. These fellows run in circles, bump into each other, jump off cliffs, hump the walls, and moonwalk while shooting paintballs from their butt. Even though you can switch between teammates by using the number keys, take care: if you accidentally switch to a character that?s stuck in a wall, you get ?squished,? and the entire team dies. Oops!
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Cuhulainn

Senior member
Jan 26, 2006
365
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"Ignore the Kha'ak entirely, and focus on self fulfillment."

Awesome. That is some densely packed innuendo.

Also, "Just how bad is Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing? It's as bad as your mind will allow you to comprehend."

Excellent stuff.
 
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Fadardo

Member
Jun 10, 2007
99
0
0
PC Accelerator Magazine (rip 2002) had the best most hilarious videogame review, especially for shitty games. They ripped into games way before other review sites and magazines started doing it. IGN and these other reviewer are mearly copycatting what PC Accelerator started.
 
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