Help with becoming a slum lord

[Mill]

Well, I've decided what I want to do with my life, and I want to be a slum lord. Anyone here have experience with being a slum lord, and how to get the most money out of poor people? I really don't want to do Section-8, because I figure it is easier to take advantage of poor people who DON'T get government assistance. Anyone have any tricks about threatening people with eviction to get rent money, and then after they pay evicting them anyway? What about ways to prevent them from abusing my heating system(they want to use it when the temp outside is warmer than 30, and I won't turn it on unless it is 30 or less) or using too much water? I figure if I implement cost saving strategies in an already low cost environment, that I could make tons of money off of poor people.

What's the best way to prevent them from reporting you to the state for violations? Threaten them with eviction or hurting their kids? Any advice is appreciated. Thanks.

Edit- Especially looking for ways to get around ADA.

 

[geno]

 

[Eli]

Hmm....

Is this a parody thread? Did I miss the original?

It's dripping with sarcasm, yet I can't tell if the heart of your message is for real or not..

 

[AvesPKS]

Do the government thing. But look for multiple small contracts (3 million is the max, I believe) to provide housing. Then, get a minority to head your "firm." That way, you don't have to go through a competitive bidding process (minority owned companies get preferential treatment on small government contracts).

 

[Sluggo]

Hire a sleazy propery management company run by some guy named Guido.

Sit back and be a rich capitalist pig, and ride the road to riches and fame on the back of Joe 6-pack.

 

[Aves]

Originally posted by: AvesPKS
Do the government thing. But look for multiple small contracts (3 million is the max, I believe) to provide housing. Then, get a minority to head your "firm." That way, you don't have to go through a competitive bidding process (minority owned companies get preferential treatment on small government contracts).

I'm a minority so I'll help you out Mill.

 

[Evadman]

Originally posted by: aves2k
I'm a minority so I'll help you out Mill.

/me gets out his beatdown stick.

 

[AvesPKS]

Originally posted by: aves2k

Originally posted by: AvesPKS
Do the government thing. But look for multiple small contracts (3 million is the max, I believe) to provide housing. Then, get a minority to head your "firm." That way, you don't have to go through a competitive bidding process (minority owned companies get preferential treatment on small government contracts).

I'm a minority so I'll help you out Mill.

There you go! This is my ultimate plan to get rich...minority government contracting.

 

[Mill]

Originally posted by: aves2k

Originally posted by: AvesPKS
Do the government thing. But look for multiple small contracts (3 million is the max, I believe) to provide housing. Then, get a minority to head your "firm." That way, you don't have to go through a competitive bidding process (minority owned companies get preferential treatment on small government contracts).

I'm a minority so I'll help you out Mill.

We could hustle the sh!t out of Lorna Rd. We could make a lot of money that way. Either that or hijack a bus full of whores. I am open to options right now.

 

[cornbread]

Well being that it's Alabama, it shouldn't be too hard to get away with.. Bham is already full of slums though.. Quite a bit of competition.
As far as saving on water costs, just come by each day with an old milk jug filled with water to each tenant, and let that be their water for the day. Don't give them a heater or ac unit, let them bring in their own window units. For added effect, buy out PetCo's stock of mice and turn them loose in each unit. Leave bread crumbs and peanut butter in each corner and tell the tenants that it's actually mouse poison, and not to mess with it.
That should give you a fairly good start.

 

[GalvanizedYankee]

Since meth is the new thing in the South. Open half-way houses for ppl
coming out of rehab. Government money and a never ending supply
of tenants. I know several ppl paying mortgages this way. Just keep
buying houses and filling em' up..

 

[Ameesh]

I'm with you man i'm gonna be a slum lord too!

72 unit apt complex in the LBC, biaaatttccccchhh!

 

[ReiAyanami]

why not just run a homeless shelter for rich people?

 

[thedarkwolf]

Rent only to people on probation and threaten to plant drugs in their apartment if they mess with you.

 

[IamElectro]

Go to a college town.

Buy the nastiest property that you can find thats near the campus.

Rent to stupid college kids. You know the ones who are out for the first time and dont know any better about what they are renting. Then if they miss thier rent payment call mom and dad.

Make them pay the utility bills and dont fix stuff until you absolutely have to, and when you do fix only do it half way.

This is the approach a lot of the landlords take here and they get away with it beacuse the city really doesn't recognize them as residents. Then when tey do complain the city doesnt care cause they are students and they are leaving eventually anyway.

 

[DWW]

IamElectro makes some valid points. The best way to make money IMO is goto university cities. The property is not above average (at least here in Ontario). You can legally rent like 3 rooms per floor on an average sized house. With upstairs and downstairs you can fit 6 people in one house, at $425/month without utils (like most charge) that is a nice $2500. Even with the mortgage on it your still rakin money in for doing -nothing- at all.

But you don't even need a nasty property. Go with something half decent, just don't put in lots of work cause college kids will tear it up after awhile.

On another note, the landlord-tennant act in Ontario is so far beyond skewed towards the tennant its sick so you might reconsider even touching real estate if that is where you live. They have too many rights over what YOU own. I hope its better wherever you live. You wouldn't believe the stupid rights they have (eg we kicked someone out due to an ACT OF GOD shutting it down and WEhad to pay FOUR MONTHS accomodations for them to stay in a more expensive place even though they had missed their rent for the last month there anyhow). And usually the hillbillies that rent out the places on wellfare don't know sh!t about anything-- but they sure know their stupid rights like the back of their hand so they can abuse the system. If they lose their job say, and being a landlord is your primary income even (as in it puts the food on your table) you cannot LEGALLY kick them out in the winter so you have to deal with their crap and lose money/go bankrupt

 

[IamElectro]

You can always go HUD if you like the government pays the bills and pays on time.