god.. she just dumped me

[Nik]

Throw yourself down the tubes. Hit absolute rock bottom. When you build yourself back up, you'll be a changed man and you can say that you don't owe anything to anybody. Rebuild the new "you" ... rise from the ashes a self-made man and be proud of your independence. Trusting others and leaning on them will never be as satisfying as not needing anyone.

 

[Dangerer]

Originally posted by: GuideBot
Throw yourself down the tubes. Hit absolute rock bottom. When you build yourself back up, you'll be a changed man and you can say that you don't owe anything to anybody. Rebuild the new "you" ... rise from the ashes a self-made man and be proud of your independence. Trusting others and leaning on them will never be as satisfying as not needing anyone.

That's one way you can look at it.. but once you're on top of the world, you'll find that it's a pretty lonely place. The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you, you just need to decide who's worth the pain.

 

[eits]

we've all been there.

just keep telling yourself that drama and crying about it isn't worth it and life goes on... you can either waste your time crying about it or you can work on getting over it, but crying's not going to bring her back any quicker.

 

[AnitaPeterson]

My sincere sympathy for your loss, bignaytek... but here's a truth quite evident form all the elements you've provided us with: she is moving on, and it's probably a good thing.

You are 22, she is 24. Look at how many people in this thread think she's much older than that. She has definitely seen a LOT more of life than you have. You just look like a sweet, naive kid. At this age, two years in the age difference represent an eternity... that's 700 days of a person's life, and at this stage in life.... oh dear!

Honestly, don't kill yourself over it. Most of my friends, in my generation, married their high-school or college sweethearts before turning 25, with little or no experience in what concerns the opposite sex or married life... and ten years later, we realize we made the wrong choice, and we're all divorcing! ...and, seriously, a separation at 35 is much harder than at 20.

So, learn the lesson, go on living, don't mope.

The way I know the human race and the two sexes that comprise it, chances are the following quote is very much on the money:

Originally posted by: 91TTZ

Originally posted by: raildogg
I am sorry for this, please give her a chance as well.

So she can return to him after the totally hot hunk dumps her for another piece of fresh meat.

Originally posted by: raildogg
Maybe something has changed in her life.

Yeah, she met some hot hunk, who probably has her bent over the bathroom sink right now.

Originally posted by: raildoggWhat is going on in her life that she has suddenly done this?

The hunk. The bathroom sink.

Originally posted by: raildogg
I don't know if she has abandoned you or not. Maybe something has changed in her life or something. Get to know her better and find out what and why she has done this.

She's keeping the OP in an emergency closet behind a plate of glass just in case things don't work out with this new dude.

Originally posted by: raildogg
Maybe you can even improve her.

lol, you really have no clue.

 

[doze]

Originally posted by: bignateyk
Ive been crying for the last two hours, and I just cracked a bottle of wine. I dont know what to do anymore.

She was a friend of mine for 20 years, and we hadnt seen each other in a few years until my sisters wedding that we were both at. We started dating, and for the next 8 months we were in one of the most passionate relationships.. I cant even describe it. I opened up to her and trusted her with everything. All I could think about was how much I couldnt wait to propose to her in a couple months.

God.. it hurts so bad..

Then a few days ago (completely without any signs whatsoever) she tells me that she thinks we might have rushed things and that she wants to slow down a little. Of course red flags start going up all over the place, and I obviously start to worry and get depressed. After more talking, she dumps me.

She tells me that she isnt ready to be in a relationship of any kind and that she isnt going to see other people. She wants to be friends, and maybe see how things work out in the future.

I just dont know if I can do that. To feel completely abandoned by someone youve known and trusted for so long.. god.. im not sure I can ever even talk to her again, but I love her so much, and part of me says to stay friends with her so that if there is just the slightest chance of getting back together it might work..

I dont know what to do.. I feel so alone, god I need help...

wow :disgust:

 

[cheapgoose]

man, what a pv$$y. have some good sex with a more experienced girl, now you're in love.

save this thread, come back in a few years, and you'll realize how stupid you sound. Unless you're actually one of these ultra sensitive, fall in love with every girl type of guy.

now for something you can actually use. Think about what happened here and learn from it. If you're this devistated by someone you've only been seeing for 8 months, maybe you should slow things down a bit next time. and please, please don't confuse passion/lust with love. plus, 20 is way too young to get married.(for most people)

 

[Ranger X]

Get your career going before you start worrying about women. I mean, you're only 22! Women say they want to be friends only because they don't have the heart to tell you straight out that they're not interested anymore. If she wants to be a friend, end the relationship and move on because why put in the extra effort when you know, deep inside, it's not going to go anywhere. Women say they want to take a break to see if they can resume the relationship in the future. Guess what? That's NEVER going to materialize. She may try to get back with you, if you find another woman before she finds another man. Just tell her "Thanks but no thanks" to the friendship and take that b**ch down from the pedestal.

The cure-all to a bad breakup is to bang any chick that moves.

 

[necine]

You'll get over it. Sorry bro, I know it hurts... been there before.

 

[PrelateBishop]

Simple, you move on. It's DONE, so get over it. Hang out with friends, drink beer, easy, and sleep with a couple new chicks. Problem solved.

 

[OVerLoRDI]

You can do this 2 ways. Don't talk to her for a while and then later talk again and see what happens. Or Don't talk to her ever again. But for the short term I feel it is best for most people after a Dumping/Break-up just to back away from each other and let thing settle for a few months or years.

 

[JS80]

Originally posted by: JLGatsby

Originally posted by: JS80
you can do 10x better than her.

lol. No he can't. He needs to lower his standards.

I was thinking more an overall picture, not just based on looks. Plus, men can buy "pretty" women.

 

[SilverTrine]

From your post I see exactly why she dumped you, you are like a needy child. Most guys have been there, but hey its time to put things in perspective.

The only way to have a successful relationship with a women is to give her your best, but at the back of your head always be thinking 'i'm giving her my best, and if she screws me over or it doesnt work out it wasnt meant to be.' You learn this stuff with experience, women at some point usually will try to dominate her man and put you under her thumb. This must be recognized and resisted at all costs even if the relationship must end. This is the #1 most important thing in a relationship to not let happen. Because as soon as it happens your life you will become miserable and she will end up obliterating you at some point because women lose all respect for men they have control over.

 

[Triforceofcourage]

Originally posted by: SilverTrine
From your post I see exactly why she dumped you, you are like a needy child. Most guys have been there, but hey its time to put things in perspective.

The only way to have a successful relationship with a women is to give her your best, but at the back of your head always be thinking 'i'm giving her my best, and if she screws me over or it doesnt work out it wasnt meant to be.' You learn this stuff with experience, women at some point usually will try to dominate her man and put you under her thumb. This must be recognized and resisted at all costs even if the relationship must end. This is the #1 most important thing in a relationship to not let happen. Because as soon as it happens your life you will become miserable and she will end up obliterating you at some point because women lose all respect for men they have control over.

This man speaks the truth, I wish I would have read this 6 months ago.
I will give you the same advise others have given me on this board when I post lame YAGT's. MAN UP, just STFU and MAN UP. Forget her she is not worth it. Truer words have never been spoken.

 

[z0mb13]

Originally posted by: JS80

Originally posted by: JLGatsby

Originally posted by: JS80
you can do 10x better than her.

lol. No he can't. He needs to lower his standards.

I was thinking more an overall picture, not just based on looks. Plus, men can buy "pretty" women.

I bet u buy "pretty" women all the time

 

[yowolabi]

Originally posted by: bignateyk

If theres one thing I do know, its that it isnt another guy. Im not saying I believe her in the slightest when she says she isnt gonna see other people though...

You didn't know she was going to dump you, and that means she's either incredible deceptive or you're terrible at reading people. Either way that means you don't "know" that it isn't another guy. Attractive young girls don't bail on a relationship to be by themselves. Either she's seeing another guy or wants to and you're in the way. The sooner you recognize that, the sooner you can realize the relationship is over and move on.

 

[meltdown75]

sorry d00d. :beer:

don't hang out alone man... that's my only advice. get out and do something.

cheers

 

[Scarpozzi]

Wow...so you've been friends since you were 2? That's deep man. Rather than posting to a bunch of computer geeks on ATOT, you should utilize your myspace account and pickup some 16 year olds on there, but then again, they probably won't give you the time of day. Just drink for a while and things will ease up. Trust me, when you meet the right girl, she won't grow tired of you in 8 months. No matter what anyone else says, the sad truth is that when a girl decides to move on, she's either over you because she met someone better, or you did something that turned her off. Just chalk it up to experience and move on....you're single. Enjoy it.

 

[Vegitto]

Drink. Smoke. Spite her for a week or two. Then join the gym, get yourself a smoking hot girl (as dumb as a brick), and make her jealous. After that, move out of state.

 

[PricklyPete]

How old are you...and take it to yagt.org...you'll get much better replies there...

 

[codeyf]

Originally posted by: randay
go.... gay?

I think thats an offer!

 

[imported_Pablo]

she's pretty, but I honestly think once you get some damn confidence you can do better. from her boobs up, she kinda looks like a funhouse mirror... long neck or something. Next time, go for perky ones.

 

[IceBergSLiM]

you were probably way more into her than she was into you and it created an imbalance as your neediness projected itself on her all the time. it became stressful and not fun for her anymore.

listen to some nwa - she swallowed it on repeat that should get you back to the right frame of mind.

 

[CFster]

Women can be ruthless.

Honestly, you've got to ask yourself now that she told you that, do you really want her back anyway. It's not like things can be the same.

 

[meltdown75]

lol, i just read the title again and now i must say hey... at least you got to date god for a while.

 

[Eli]

8 months?

Get over it.