A few things I've learned when my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me. Believe me, I was naive as most people to think that we were something special.
1) Don't romanticize her, don't put her on a pedestal.
2) Exercise. I was very lean when I was with my ex; now I'm more healthy, running 4 miles a day and benching more than my weight. I like to think I look good.
3) Get busy. Do whatever you can to not think about her, especially if you're in school. She's not worth the falling grades.
4) Learn from this experience.
Other than that, I pretty much agree with 91TTZ.
1) Don't romanticize her, don't put her on a pedestal.
2) Exercise. I was very lean when I was with my ex; now I'm more healthy, running 4 miles a day and benching more than my weight. I like to think I look good.
3) Get busy. Do whatever you can to not think about her, especially if you're in school. She's not worth the falling grades.
4) Learn from this experience.
Other than that, I pretty much agree with 91TTZ.
JulesMaximus
No Lifer
- Jul 3, 2003
- 74,600
- 1,005
- 126
#1: She wants to play the field.
#2: #1 Because in all honesty, you look geeky and don't look like the type she'd normally date.
#3: You need to bulk up like Danny Bonaduce sans the roid rage.
#2: #1 Because in all honesty, you look geeky and don't look like the type she'd normally date.
#3: You need to bulk up like Danny Bonaduce sans the roid rage.
it wasnt about looks... I can bench a set of 10 at 205lbs, I weigh 155lbs, and I work out 4 times a week. Trust me, you cant tell from a picture of someone in a tux...
Change your avatar and change your outlook on life. Don't put the pvssy on a pedestal...you can do 10x better than her.
you're only 22, you have a long life ahead of you, and chance to meet a lot more people. It's not the end of the world, it only feels like it. Just take it easy, and go out and talk to other people. It'll feel better after a while, and soon, you'll forget about it.
uberman
Golden Member
- Sep 15, 2006
- 1,942
- 1
- 81
I've been there too. It sounds like you need to pack up and move on. I mean, put her in the past and move on to your future. When I was your age I went through pretty much the same thing and did stupid things like keeping momentos of that person that were triggers to thinking about them. It's kind of a self destructive behavior and we don't really see it.
I used a pop psychology book called, "Letting Go," to get that person out of my head. There were a lot of good ideas. She's dumped you. You might as well read and quit boosting her ego and start taking care of yourself. It's funny, when we're in it we don't see things clearly.
I was dating my History professor and couldn't understand why I was so infatuated with her. She looked exactly like my ex. I stopped that relationship imediately.
Be happy. A divorce down the road is no picnic. Here's a link to the book:
[http://www.shop.com/op/~Bantam_Books_Le...ack)-prod-22487569-30434678?sourceid=3]
I used a pop psychology book called, "Letting Go," to get that person out of my head. There were a lot of good ideas. She's dumped you. You might as well read and quit boosting her ego and start taking care of yourself. It's funny, when we're in it we don't see things clearly.
I was dating my History professor and couldn't understand why I was so infatuated with her. She looked exactly like my ex. I stopped that relationship imediately.
Be happy. A divorce down the road is no picnic. Here's a link to the book:
[http://www.shop.com/op/~Bantam_Books_Le...ack)-prod-22487569-30434678?sourceid=3]
it's tough when it's out of the blue. are you certain there weren't any warning signs? often times we're so caught up in the bliss we ignore obvious signs of trouble. think about it, maybe the writing was on the wall (not that it matters now i guess).
best thing you can do is get through the mourning stage as fast as you can and do other stuff to help you through the slow process of healing your broken heart. worse thing you can do is contact her. if she wants to be friends i'd suggest waiting a month or two before you contact her. stay away from relationships (serious ones) for a while, rebounds almost always end badly.
as someone already stated don't romanticize her, perspective is key. she was not perfect, she did not validate your existance on this planet, she was a girlfriend and if she's meant to be that again, she will. if not then the path has been cleared for you to find the right one...
best thing you can do is get through the mourning stage as fast as you can and do other stuff to help you through the slow process of healing your broken heart. worse thing you can do is contact her. if she wants to be friends i'd suggest waiting a month or two before you contact her. stay away from relationships (serious ones) for a while, rebounds almost always end badly.
as someone already stated don't romanticize her, perspective is key. she was not perfect, she did not validate your existance on this planet, she was a girlfriend and if she's meant to be that again, she will. if not then the path has been cleared for you to find the right one...
Well, there's your first mistake. Learn from it.
Women are weird with relationships, and some men seem to do just what you did and fall into little relationship niches that they can't get out of when it's over. Don't fall so easily.
Not to be an insensitive jerk, but we've all been through it. Take it easy a bit, and be careful selecting your women from now on. Don't try and make every relationship 'the one.'
Read my other post on that. I'm not insulting him or putting him down, I'm just saying he needs to be realistic. It's not insulting at all. It's not smart to risk emotions on a girl who is out of your league.
Bad ****** happens. Come to the Philly ATOT meet. I'll introduce you to this girl I know. She likes cats. 
Paratus
Lifer
- Jun 4, 2004
- 17,761
- 16,112
- 146
Just remember what doesn't kill you........................
Generally just fvcks you up for life.
Seriously - Give yourself a week - Feel bad and mope about - then move on. There are plenty of other people out there don't waste too much time.
Good Luck :thumbsup:
Generally just fvcks you up for life.
Seriously - Give yourself a week - Feel bad and mope about - then move on. There are plenty of other people out there don't waste too much time.
Good Luck :thumbsup:
I loved this girl and I traveled far across the world for her. Many times. Both of us knew that it wasn't meant to be. But I still miss her so much.
You need to get yourself involved in something you feel passionate about. I did and it kept my sanity in check.
You need to get yourself involved in something you feel passionate about. I did and it kept my sanity in check.
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