Girlfriend Issue

[Syringer]

I don't regularly post here... but once in a while, I turn to you guys for the help I need.

This regards my girlfriend--she is scared of her parents finding out about us because she's afraid that they'll blame our relationship if her grades drop and whatnot (we're Juniors in college).

We have our 6-month anniversary tomorrow... but yeah, I am having problems coping with "being non-existant" in her life... her sister is like a 3rd parent, and she can't know about me either.. nobody in her family can, it seems.

Anyways, my parents have met her (after maybe our 2nd month together) and she's always at my house when we head home during the weekend... my parents love her and see great things for our future.

I guess I'm just having a hard time dealing with not being in her family life... I know that I will have the patience to wait until she's ready, I'm not pressuring her or anything. Is there just anything that I can do so that I don't feel so weirdish by this?

She plans on telling her parents/sister about us after she gets a job -- figuring that's in a year.

I know there will be people here who tell me that they didn't get to meet parents until year 2 or whatever--I know that , I just want to know if there's anything that I can do to help myself

Thanks

 

[Colt45]

kill her family. or.. talk to them.

your choice

 

[Colt45]

wait a second, your a junior?

that makes you what, 20yrs old?

tell 'em to suck it!

 

[Syringer]

Hehehe.

I can't talk to them... it'd probably upset her if I went into contact w/ them (oh yeah, we're really close... we spend pretty much all day together... same college, live close to each other)

Maybe it's just me--she says things like , "They'll love you", stuff like that

Yeah, we're both 20.

 

[TNTrulez]

Hahahah that's so funny. If I was in college I wouldn't care what my parents think, unless ofcourse they are paying for my education. But since I'm paying for myself, who cares?

 

[TNTrulez]

Originally posted by: TNTrulez
Hahahah that's so funny. If I was in college I wouldn't care what my parents think, unless ofcourse they are paying for my education. But since I'm paying for myself, who cares?

Oh wait a minute, I am in college.

 

[Storm]

Well is the problem a cultural issue? Or is more like her parents are over protective and can't
believe their little girl is growing up?

My suggestion would be for you to give her your parents number when she breaks the news.
So if need be they can call and parents can talk. Im sure they will feel more comfortable knowing
that their daughter's boyfriend's parents know about the relationship, yet they might also be
pissed they were told of it. In any case they should talk.

 

[olds]

Sounds to me like she has a boyfriend back home and is afraid that her parents will dime her out.

 

[xuanman]

Originally posted by: Storm
Well is the problem a cultural issue? Or is more like her parents are over protective and can't
believe their little girl is growing up?

My suggestion would be for you to give her your parents number when she breaks the news.
So if need be they can call and parents can talk. Im sure they will feel more comfortable knowing
that their daughter's boyfriend's parents know about the relationship, yet they might also be
pissed they were told of it. In any case they should talk.

that's exactly my question: is it a cultural thing?

 

[kami]

Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
Sounds to me like she has a boyfriend back home and is afraid that her parents will dime her out.

 

[gopunk]

hmm.... whenever i had a gf, i never had the slightest inclination to meet her family. in fact i kind of dreaded it. anyways

you should wait for a quarter where she gets hella good grades and then she can be like "oh yea, i've been dating him all this qtr"

 

[Syringer]

It's not a cultural thing... her parents are overprotective from what I hear from her.. her sister EVEN worse....

Well, the reason I feel inclined to meet her parents is that we've fallen in love w/ each other--not sure if 6 months is too soon for that sort of thing, but yeah, we've verbally expressed our love for each other.

And I have a strong sense that this will be the person that I will marry... she feels the same way too.

 

[crystal]

Originally posted by: Syringer
It's not a cultural thing... her parents are overprotective from what I hear from her.. her sister EVEN worse....

Well, the reason I feel inclined to meet her parents is that we've fallen in love w/ each other--not sure if 6 months is too soon for that sort of thing, but yeah, we've verbally expressed our love for each other.

And I have a strong sense that this will be the person that I will marry... she feels the same way too.

Why don't you both wait until you finish with school before you guys decide to talk about marrige. BTW, there is no need to rush in meet her parents.