Girl Problem

[Ares2600]

Originally posted by: Kroze
how shallow am if i told her...yea i can't see you anymore because i need someone smarter

Well.. not advocating lying here or anything... but you have to be more tactful than that. Tell her you're just not that compatible and need to explore more possibilities. You're not exactly lying, but you're also not telling her she's stupid. Also, it IS probably a good idea to bring up the ambition thing. If she actually loses what she sees as a good thing over it, it'll probably kick her ass in gear and help her grow up.

I think your worries about appearing 'shallow' are just your fears about actually breaking up with her. You're scared to do it, and you're scared of being alone. That's my reaction at least. Don't be unhappy just because it's comfortable. That's from personal experience, and others seem to be saying the same thing here.

 

[PatboyX]

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: rondor
After reading the original post, I find it hard to believe you would have any concern about another individual's intelligence. Your post is full of grammatical errors and your sentence structure is unbelieveable. People in glass houses...

Unconditional love is NOT that hard to come by. Check out God's love for you. Having a relationship with someone you obviously consider inferior to you will not work, even if she loves you unconditionally.

*waves to rondor through his house*

well, his last sentence is still quite relevant.

 

[EGGO]

There's always P&N.

 

[Excelsior]

Originally posted by: Jzero

Originally posted by: Kroze
she just show me unconditional love and that's hard to come by..

Pardon my harsh phrasing, but unconditional love can be found in the gaze of most any dog. Unconditional love is a great thing, but without compatibility (which it sounds like is missing from your relationship) it is not worth a whole lot.

So true. Get a dog if you want unconditional love with something that is dumb. They are less maintenence.

 

[Martin]

I find your post shallow and pedantic.

</FG>

 

[Geekbabe]

She's willing to work hard , not looking for others to pay her way . It sounds though like she's too young yet to have learned the secret of sucess , to work smarter instead of harder . That's a lesson that comes with time and even if it dioesn't if she applies herself she can rise to a position of making really good money , those chains frequently educate and promote from within and their managers make decent money and get nice stock options .

Hard workers are often very loyal , steadfast people , don't write her off just because she isn't just like you . When the dot com's went bust a lot of computer geeks had bread put on the table by such wives .

 

[OneOfTheseDays]

for someone complaining about intelligence you have the english grammar skills of a 10 year old.

 

[eakers]

Originally posted by: Kroze
What would you do if you're with a girl that show you unconditional love but she's not that smart?

Like i can't normally hold a conversation with her at all. i believed in the 20 iq rule (a person cannot get along/friend with another if they have the diff of more than 20 in iq).

she have no vision or dream to better hersel (college, work)

she believed that to make more money, you just work more. currently she's working @ 2 jobs (arby & boston market)

and no vision to go to college ot better herself. she's just happy with the simple life.

i just don't know...she just show me unconditional love and that's hard to come by..

vs my ex.

It doesn't seem to me like her iq is the problem but rather you come from two different worlds. She values hardwork and being loyal, you value education.

Don't use her for her love. If you loved her, you'd understand that shes happy where she is now. She needs to find someone who will appreciate her, her values and skills and not just someone who apprecites how much she loves them.

 

[sonz70]

Blond bimbo's just arn't doing it for you anymore eh?

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: Kroze
What would you do if you're with a girl that show you unconditional love but she's not that smart?

Like i can't normally hold a conversation with her at all. i believed in the 20 iq rule (a person cannot get along/friend with another if they have the diff of more than 20 in iq).

she have no vision or dream to better hersel (college, work)

she believed that to make more money, you just work more. currently she's working @ 2 jobs (arby & boston market)

and no vision to go to college ot better herself. she's just happy with the simple life.

i just don't know...she just show me unconditional love and that's hard to come by..

vs my ex.

maybe your english makes it hard for her to understand you.

 

[kami333]

Originally posted by: Feldenak
I could not be with a girl that is not intellectually stimulating in a relationship. For that, I am eternally grateful for my wife. She's a smart cookie...even if I have to kinda just nod my head when she starts talking about PCRs, capillary arrays, etc...

My last 3 out of my last 4 gf's have been bio nerds as I am. Its kind of wierd when you are at a restraunt having a nice dinner, then start talking about the food, and suddenly the conversation is about genetic drift and markers and other things. Or you are outside, see a mosquito, then spend the next 5min trying to classify it. I just don't remember what normal people talk about anymore...

OP: there's nothing wrong with leading a simple life, as long as you/her are happy.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Judging by your prowess with the English language and writing skills I'd say you are perfect for her.

 

[silverpig]

Who cares if she's smart, if she's rich, if she's educated? Just ask yourself if you're happy with her as a person and go with the answer. I dated a girl who's life was completely different from mine, who was the exact opposite of me, and who was not at all anything like my pictured ideal woman, but damn did I ever love her. Our personalities were perfect for each other, and that is the most important thing. The rest you can work around, but if there isn't that unconditional love, that connection, then it's a relationship based on circumstance and not on happiness.

Of course I screwed up by not realizing what I had and what was important, and lost her, but that just means I'm an idiot... at least I know what I'm talking about now though

 

[skace]

So she is working 2 weak jobs right now, are you 100% sure this is the most she wants out of life? She's never shown any motivation towards getting a better job, a smaller workload, a career? You better be damn positive before labeling that because I've met very few people who would work 2 jobs without the motivation to better themselves overall.

 

[Chadder007]

You can take the girl out of the trailer park.....but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl.

 

[Sam334]

I dated a dumb, hot chick once. My penis was happy, but my brain almost imploded.

 

[SilentZero]

Dumb chicks rock! My wife is extremely intelligent, so I wouldn't mind a hot dumb girl for a few weeks as a break.

 

[mrchan]

Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
for someone complaining about intelligence you have the english grammar skills of a 10 year old.

No kidding. Pot, kettle, black.

 

[Koing]

Originally posted by: eakers

Originally posted by: Kroze
What would you do if you're with a girl that show you unconditional love but she's not that smart?

Like i can't normally hold a conversation with her at all. i believed in the 20 iq rule (a person cannot get along/friend with another if they have the diff of more than 20 in iq).

she have no vision or dream to better hersel (college, work)

she believed that to make more money, you just work more. currently she's working @ 2 jobs (arby & boston market)

and no vision to go to college ot better herself. she's just happy with the simple life.

i just don't know...she just show me unconditional love and that's hard to come by..

vs my ex.

It doesn't seem to me like her iq is the problem but rather you come from two different worlds. She values hardwork and being loyal, you value education.

Don't use her for her love. If you loved her, you'd understand that shes happy where she is now. She needs to find someone who will appreciate her, her values and skills and not just someone who apprecites how much she loves them.

Indeed.

Nothing wrong with the simple life at all imo. I would be happy to retire and to just train and do things with my life when I have my businesses in check. Why work until 55 when I am happy to just train and coach?

I'm educated (not that means that much ) and have my CS degree. I work hard but £££ is over rated imo and as long as I have enough and I can train that is me content :thumbsup: but of course I want to be the best at what I do.

Do you guys get along 'great'? Do you guys have fun together?

Koing

 

[theknight571]

As far as work / education is concerned I think you're being a little shallow. If she likes what shes doing and is happy with it let her be. Perhaps over time she'll get the ambition to move up the chain where shes at.

My wife has no college degree... but she likes what she does so I don't push it. I'd rather have a happy wife than one that was getting a degree and hated it...cause that might extend on to me cause I pushed for it.

If you can't hold a decent conversation though..then I don't know. I haven't found anyone I couldn't hold a conversation with... it might not be about the meaning of the life, but a decent conversation none the less.

There are only two subjects the wife and I don't discuss... Politics and Unions. We learned early on that our opinions differ and that we're not going to change one another's views... so we just don't discuss it. lol Works for us.


Plus once you get married... it doesn't matter what you say anymore.... j/k

- TK

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: crystal
Education is overated. Getting a degree will not guarantee you a good job or that you will be happy with job. BTW, there is no way one could know/learn everything there is.
The important question is, do you love her? Are you able to talk/discuss...

While a degree may be overrated (depending on what doors it opens for you), education itself most definitely is not. Education expands your worldview and helps you to think beyond the mere here and now.

 

[Koing]

Do you also realise how many people HATE their jobs with a College degree?

Koing

 

[Mayfriday0529]

Originally posted by: Sam334
I dated a dumb, hot chick once. My penis was happy, but my brain almost imploded.

agreed

 

[classy]

She sounds fine to me. College is not for everyone. I would help encourage her to look for a more rewarding job, but to just push college and think her IQ is not up to yours is a bit near sighted. There are a lot of good careers where college is not necessary. Perfect example similar to Boston Market, a family member on my wife's side works at a place called Applebees and he makes a decent salary as an assistant manager and he was a bus boy. I am a little older than most of you young bucks and some of the stuff ain't gonna mean a hill beans in a long run. If you want someone just like you good luck, trust me you think your struggling for conversation now, lol. There is a reason opposites attract