Funny Story

Doggiedog

Lifer
Aug 17, 2000
12,780
5
81
On the morning show at a radio station in Chicago they play a game for prizes usually vacations and such, called "Mate Match." The DJ's ring someone at work and ask if they are married or in a serious relationship. If yes, then this person is asked 3 very personal questions that vary from couple to couple and asked for their significant others name and work phone number. If the significant other answers correctly then they are winners.

This particular day it got interesting:

----------------------


DJ: HEY! This is Edgar on WBAM. Do you know "Mate Match"?
Contestant: (laughing) Yes I do.
DJ: What is your name? First only please.
Contestant: Brian
DJ: Are you married or what Brian?
Brian: Yes.
DJ:"Yes"? Does this mean your are married or what, Brian?
Brian: (laughing nervously) Yes I am married.
DJ: Thank you Brian. OK, now, what is your wife's name? First only please, Brian.
Brian: Sara.

DJ: Is Sara at work Brian?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: Stay with me here Brian! Is she at work?
Brian: (laughing) Yes she is.

DJ: All right then, first question: When was the last time you had sex?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: BRIAN! Stay with me here man.
Brian: About 8 o'clock this morning.
DJ: Atta boy.
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) Well.

DJ: Number 2: How long did it last?
Brian: About 10 minutes.
DJ: Wow! You really want that trip huh? No one would ever have said that if there weren't a trip at stake.
Brian: Yeah, it would be really nice.

DJ: OK. Final question: Where was it that you had sex at 8 this morning?
Brian: (laughing hard) I ummmmm...
DJ: This sounds good Brian where was it?
Brian: Not that it was all that great just that her mom is staying with us for a couple of weeks and she was taking a shower at the time.

DJ: Ooooooh, sneaky boy!
Brian: On the kitchen table.
DJ: "Not that great"? That is more adventurous than the last hundred times I have done it. Anyway, (to audience) I will put Brianon hold, get his wife's
work number and call her up. You listen to this.

(Advertisements)

DJ: (to audience) Let's call Sara shall we? (touch tones *ringing*)
Clerk: Kinko's.
DJ: Hey, is Sara around there somewhere?
Clerk: This is she.
DJ: Sara, this is Edgar with WBAM. I have been speaking with Brian for a couple of hours now..
Sara: (laughing) A couple of hours?

DJ: Well, a while anyway. He is also on the line with us. Brian knows not to give away any answers or you lose. Soooooooo, do you know the rules of "Mate Match"?
Sara: No
DJ: Good.
Brian: (laughing)
Sara: (laughing) Brian, what the hell are you up to?
Brian: (laughing) Just answer his questions honestly OK?
Sara: Oh, Brian
DJ: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sara I will now ask you 3 questions and if you answer what Brian has said then the 2 of you are off to Orlando Florida at our expense. This does include tickets to DisneyWorld, Sea World and tickets to see the Orlando Magic play. Get it Sara? SARA! GET IT Orlando Magic, they are on strike Sara "helloooooo" anyone home?!?!

Sara: (laughing hard) YES, yes.
Brian: (laughing)
DJ: All right, when did you have sex last Sara?
Sara: Oh God, Brian...this morning before Brian went to work.
DJ: What time?
Sara: About 8 I think. (sound effect) DING DING DING

DJ: Very good. Next question: How long did it last?
Sara: 12,15 minutes maybe.
DJ: hhmmmmm
Background voice in studio: That's close enough. I am sure she is trying not to harm his manhood.
DJ: Well, we will give you that one. Last question: Where did you do it?

Sara: OH MY GOD, BRIAN! You did not tell them did you?!?!
Brian: Just tell him honey.
DJ: What is bothering you so much Sara?
Sara: Well, It's just that my mom is vacationing with us and...
DJ: SHE SAW?!?!
Sara: BRIAN?!?!
Brian: NO, no I didn't...
DJ: Ease up there sister. Just messin' with your head. Your answer?

Sara: Dear Lord,..I cannot believe you told them this.
Brian: Come on honey it's for a trip to Florida.
DJ: Let's go Sara we ain't got all day. Where did you do it?
Sara: In the ass.

(long pause)

DJ: We will be right back.

(advertisements)

DJ: I am sorry for that ladies and gentlemen. This is live radio and these things do happen. Anyway, Brian and Sara are off to lovely Orlando, Florida.

Re-edited formatting.

Thanks Croton
 

Croton

Banned
Jan 18, 2000
5,030
0
0
AHAHHAHAH

funny shiet!

anyway, i reformmated it to read it a little eaiser ( i sent i to my coworkers...read it.)

Kind of a long read, but funny shiet!

Ning


On the morning show at a radio station in Chicago they play a game for prizes usually vacations and such, called "Mate Match." The DJ's ring someone at work and ask if they are married or in a serious relationship. If yes, then this person is asked 3 very personal questions that vary from couple to couple and asked for their significant others name and work phone number. If the significant other answers correctly then they are winners.

This particular day it got interesting:

----------------------


DJ: HEY! This is Edgar on WBAM. Do you know "Mate Match"?
Contestant: (laughing) Yes I do.
DJ: What is your name? First only please.
Contestant: Brian
DJ: Are you married or what Brian?
Brian: Yes.
DJ:"Yes"? Does this mean your are married or what, Brian?
Brian: (laughing nervously) Yes I am married.
DJ: Thank you Brian. OK, now, what is your wife's name? First only please, Brian.
Brian: Sara.

DJ: Is Sara at work Brian?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: Stay with me here Brian! Is she at work?
Brian: (laughing) Yes she is.

DJ: All right then, first question: When was the last time you had sex?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: BRIAN! Stay with me here man.
Brian: About 8 o'clock this morning.
DJ: Atta boy.
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) Well.

DJ: Number 2: How long did it last?
Brian: About 10 minutes.
DJ: Wow! You really want that trip huh? No one would ever have said that if there weren't a trip at stake.
Brian: Yeah, it would be really nice.

DJ: OK. Final question: Where was it that you had sex at 8 this morning?
Brian: (laughing hard) I ummmmm...
DJ: This sounds good Brian where was it?
Brian: Not that it was all that great just that her mom is staying with us for a couple of weeks and she was taking a shower at the time.

DJ: Ooooooh, sneaky boy!
Brian: On the kitchen table.
DJ: "Not that great"? That is more adventurous than the last hundred times I have done it. Anyway, (to audience) I will put Brianon hold, get his wife's
work number and call her up. You listen to this.

(Advertisements)

DJ: (to audience) Let's call Sara shall we? (touch tones *ringing*)
Clerk: Kinko's.
DJ: Hey, is Sara around there somewhere?
Clerk: This is she.
DJ: Sara, this is Edgar with WBAM. I have been speaking with Brian for a couple of hours now..
Sara: (laughing) A couple of hours?

DJ: Well, a while anyway. He is also on the line with us. Brian knows not to give away any answers or you lose. Soooooooo, do you know the rules of "Mate Match"?
Sara: No
DJ: Good.
Brian: (laughing)
Sara: (laughing) Brian, what the hell are you up to?
Brian: (laughing) Just answer his questions honestly OK?
Sara: Oh, Brian
DJ: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sara I will now ask you 3 questions and if you answer what Brian has said then the 2 of you are off to Orlando Florida at our expense. This does include tickets to DisneyWorld, Sea World and tickets to see the Orlando Magic play. Get it Sara? SARA! GET IT Orlando Magic, they are on strike Sara "helloooooo" anyone home?!?!

Sara: (laughing hard) YES, yes.
Brian: (laughing)
DJ: All right, when did you have sex last Sara?
Sara: Oh God, Brian...this morning before Brian went to work.
DJ: What time?
Sara: About 8 I think. (sound effect) DING DING DING

DJ: Very good. Next question: How long did it last?
Sara: 12,15 minutes maybe.
DJ: hhmmmmm
Background voice in studio: That's close enough. I am sure she is trying not to harm his manhood.
DJ: Well, we will give you that one. Last question: Where did you do it?

Sara: OH MY GOD, BRIAN! You did not tell them did you?!?!
Brian: Just tell him honey.
DJ: What is bothering you so much Sara?
Sara: Well, It's just that my mom is vacationing with us and...
DJ: SHE SAW?!?!
Sara: BRIAN?!?!
Brian: NO, no I didn't...
DJ: Ease up there sister. Just messin' with your head. Your answer?

Sara: Dear Lord,..I cannot believe you told them this.
Brian: Come on honey it's for a trip to Florida.
DJ: Let's go Sara we ain't got all day. Where did you do it?
Sara: In the ass.

(long pause)

DJ: We will be right back.

(advertisements)

DJ: I am sorry for that ladies and gentlemen. This is live radio and these things do happen. Anyway, Brian and Sara are off to lovely Orlando, Florida.
 

Spooner

Lifer
Jan 16, 2000
12,025
1
76
This is such an old story. Funny as hell, but I don't think it's real either.

----------

Ever hear the Opie and Anthony one where they gave away 100 Grand to a caller?
O&A: "Congrats, you just won 100 grand."
Caller: "Woo hoo!!! Holy Cow!!" (like Reeeeeeeeeeeal excited)
O&A: "So what are you gonna do now?"
CAller: "I'm gonna buy a new truck, pay off debt... woo hoo!!!!"
O&A: "Wait, how are you gonna do that with a candy bar?"
Caller: "What?"
O&A: "Yeah, you just won 100 Grand candy bar, bro, congratulations"
Caller: "WTF?? I just spent 3 hours listening to the radio and called in a million times, you're giving me my money you sons of bitches" (blah blah blah, lots of expletives)

O&A hang up.


Way funnier live, obviously.
 

Doggiedog

Lifer
Aug 17, 2000
12,780
5
81
Spooner, I remember hearing that MP3 file. That is some funny sh!t. That guy was soo pissed.
 

Spooner

Lifer
Jan 16, 2000
12,025
1
76
Doggiedog, wouldn't you be? So funny, though.

Opie and Anthony are pretty funny DJ's. They used to be in Boston, but got fired after playing a prank saying that the mayor was dead.

Now they're in New York and syndicated on the radio station that fired them's rival station.

Gotta love that.