Funny resume bit I copied out for you to enjoy.....

[MisterJackson]

....he knows how to make "Pizza delivery guy" sound good.

Before you flame, I'm not knocking pizza guys in ANY way. This guy has a C.S. degree and this was at the bottom of his work history portion.

He's looking for something in IT now, obviously. With abilities to b.s. like this me thinks he has great management potential!



Order Preperation/Distribution Specialist/Customer Service Liason
Millenium Enterprises, Inc. (Domino's Pizza Inc. Franchise), (4 semesters)
- Prioritized job responsibilities in high-paced environment with little room for error
-Ensured safe/efficient transportation of food. ( )
-Appropriated and allocated cost effective portioning for goods. ( good @ spreading cheese??)
-Addressed customer complaints and concerns in order to increase repeat business

 

[clamum]

Hehe. I did the same for when I had Taco Bell on my resume (and an apartment cleaning position, haha) though not quite as "spiffed up" as his.

 

[sdifox]

I bet he put in synergy somewhere on the resume...

I once had an UPS driver apply for an Oracle DBA job... I figured he was just doing the UPS thing to pay bills... nope, read the resume, no mention of computers.

Another good one is this cover letter

"Dear sir/madam,

I am applying for the following jobs

434-234
34534-234
2344-02332
234-23423
.
.
.


a list of 12 jobs... none of them remotely related to each other... and yes, it's still the Oracle DBA job.

 

[andylawcc]

Originally posted by: MisterJackson
Order Preperation/Distribution Specialist/Customer Service Liason
Millenium Enterprises, Inc. (Domino's Pizza Inc. Franchise), (4 semesters)
- Prioritized job responsibilities in high-paced environment with little room for error
-Ensured safe/efficient transportation of food. ( )
-Appropriated and allocated cost effective portioning for goods. ( good @ spreading cheese??)
-Addressed customer complaints and concerns in order to increase repeat business

Millenium Entreprise? hahahah if I work for Pizza Hut I could say I work for a NYSE-listed, Fortune 500 company.

 

[habib89]

very nice.. just like i was an water distribution engineer (water boy) in high school

 

[SoulAssassin]

I would have replaced "food" with "product" or something like that but it's still pretty good.

 

[mjrpes3]

You can make anything sound good on a resume....

Occupation: Beer Drinker
* Navigated multi-room environment to locate refrigerator device, 5 or more times a day
* Mastered complexity of metallic bottle opener tool with greater than half-second-to-open performance (98% percentile)
* Successfully handled domestic complaints and concerns via proprietary inner-ear sponge device
* Strong work ethic and immediate response time when confronted with empty-bottle situations
* Gladly worked overtime and weekends

 

[TheNinja]

lol - that makes me laugh. if it were me, I'd just leave it off the resume. Seriously, nobody cares if you were a delivery boy in college.

like we had a guy that had "forklift operator" on his resume for a helpdesk position. It's irrelavant.

 

[Born2bwire]

Too bad he doesn't know how to spell "preparation."

 

[ch33zw1z]

pretty funny, don't know if i'd even include it. but how knows, might be his only exp!

 

[Martin]

Thankfully I have enough experience not to have to put that kinda stuff on my resume. Otherwise it might have things like...

Gardener
*watered plants

Courtesy Clerk
*bagged groceries
*hid in washroom to avoid customers

 

[Pepsi90919]

hire that man