Found out a fact I don't like about a good friend of mine

[mordantmonkey]

Originally posted by: Spartan Niner

Originally posted by: archcommus

Originally posted by: Spartan Niner
Has s/he considered how s/he'd feel if someone stole from them?

They claim they wouldn't steal from an individual because that's wrong, but it doesn't matter from big stores because no one really hurts from the loss.

Their logic fails. If you hurt a store's profit you hurt the store's employees as well. Who are just average schmucks trying to make a living too.

i don't necessarily buy that argument considering that many companies keep wages as low as possible in order to keep profits as high as possible regardless of theft.

not that i condone theft. but i just think that's a weak argument.

 

[daveshel]

Originally posted by: Spartan Niner

Originally posted by: archcommus

Originally posted by: Spartan Niner
Has s/he considered how s/he'd feel if someone stole from them?

They claim they wouldn't steal from an individual because that's wrong, but it doesn't matter from big stores because no one really hurts from the loss.

Their logic fails. If you hurt a store's profit you hurt the store's employees as well. Who are just average schmucks trying to make a living too.

If they are on a crusade to punish the Wal-Marts of the world, who exploit and hurt their employees, this might not be a sign of general immorality, but it's a slippery slope. You just might be next.

 

[MagnusTheBrewer]

You know that kleptomania is a form of mental illness. right? I'm not saying that this person actually has kleptomania but, if he/she does, the ONLY way to get him/her help is to turn him/her in. 'Course, they may just be a scum sucking dirtbag so, how good a friend are you?

 

[daveymark]

all thieves are scum (they're almost as bad as car salespeople)

 

[FDF12389]

Have them grab me a new watch.

 

[effowe]

So why doesn't this logic apply to software / music pirates? Sure, intellectual property is different than physical property, but downloading something for free that you could otherwise buy is stealing isn't it? Would you all feel the same about your friend if you found hundreds of gigs of pirated software on their computer? I don't see how this is any different. They are free to live their lives like they want, and if they get caught then that's their problem. I would have problems with them stealing from a store when I was with them, as I may be taken in by association, but if they are doing it on their own time then that's their business.

 

[MagnusTheBrewer]

Originally posted by: effowe
So why doesn't this logic apply to software / music pirates? Sure, intellectual property is different than physical property, but downloading something for free that you could otherwise buy is stealing isn't it? Would you all feel the same about your friend if you found hundreds of gigs of pirated software on their computer? I don't see how this is any different. They are free to live their lives like they want, and if they get caught then that's their problem. I would have problems with them stealing from a store when I was with them, as I may be taken in by association, but if they are doing it on their own time then that's their business.

Bullshit, you're judged by the company you keep.

 

[zinfamous]

Originally posted by: archcommus

Originally posted by: RichardE

Originally posted by: Spartan Niner

Originally posted by: archcommus

Originally posted by: Spartan Niner
Has s/he considered how s/he'd feel if someone stole from them?

They claim they wouldn't steal from an individual because that's wrong, but it doesn't matter from big stores because no one really hurts from the loss.

Their logic fails. If you hurt a store's profit you hurt the store's employees as well. Who are just average schmucks trying to make a living too.

Possible s/he never thought about that

I'm sure if I mentioned that they'd just say "Well, just me doing it isn't making any difference. Whether I individually do or don't, nothing will change."

But that's just the classic "free riding" mentality, and having no desire to help contribute to the sustainability of society. Which is part of why I'm changing how I think about this person.

just kick him/her in the baby-maker and move on.

 

[Drako]

Originally posted by: Jeff7

Originally posted by: Leros

A common mistake people make is to use "they" for he/she

Of course, we've got a dandy language without a gender-neutral term.

How about "it"?

 

[mh47g]

Originally posted by: Drako

Originally posted by: Jeff7

Originally posted by: Leros

A common mistake people make is to use "they" for he/she

Of course, we've got a dandy language without a gender-neutral term.

How about "it"?

I'm no english pro, but I thought in order to use "it" you had to have previously identified what "it" is...

 

[kranky]

Originally posted by: effowe
So why doesn't this logic apply to software / music pirates? Sure, intellectual property is different than physical property, but downloading something for free that you could otherwise buy is stealing isn't it? Would you all feel the same about your friend if you found hundreds of gigs of pirated software on their computer? I don't see how this is any different. They are free to live their lives like they want, and if they get caught then that's their problem. I would have problems with them stealing from a store when I was with them, as I may be taken in by association, but if they are doing it on their own time then that's their business.

Yes, they can live like they want. But if they are dishonest, I choose not to be their friend. There's no way I want to be a close friend to someone while knowing I can't give them a key to my house in an emergency because they might (probably would) steal from me.

I'd actually have more respect for someone who stole and said, "I know it's wrong, but I don't care." The whole rationalization that it really doesn't matter is the same line of thinking they will use to steal from friends or anyone else. People who steal are just unprincipled and they will steal from anyone if they want something. There's always a way to rationalize it so they can feel better about it.

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: Drako

Originally posted by: Jeff7

Originally posted by: Leros

A common mistake people make is to use "they" for he/she

Of course, we've got a dandy language without a gender-neutral term.

How about "it"?

Sure, except that "it" is a word which applies to objects, not people. I don't see that status changing anytime soon.

 

[MagnusTheBrewer]

Originally posted by: kranky

Originally posted by: effowe
So why doesn't this logic apply to software / music pirates? Sure, intellectual property is different than physical property, but downloading something for free that you could otherwise buy is stealing isn't it? Would you all feel the same about your friend if you found hundreds of gigs of pirated software on their computer? I don't see how this is any different. They are free to live their lives like they want, and if they get caught then that's their problem. I would have problems with them stealing from a store when I was with them, as I may be taken in by association, but if they are doing it on their own time then that's their business.

Yes, they can live like they want. But if they are dishonest, I choose not to be their friend. There's no way I want to be a close friend to someone while knowing I can't give them a key to my house in an emergency because they might (probably would) steal from me.

I'd actually have more respect for someone who stole and said, "I know it's wrong, but I don't care." The whole rationalization that it really doesn't matter is the same line of thinking they will use to steal from friends or anyone else. People who steal are just unprincipled and they will steal from anyone if they want something. There's always a way to rationalize it so they can feel better about it.

Exactly. To the folks who think their friends behavior has no effect on them I would ask, have you no pride, no self respect?

 

[NakaNaka]

I would distance yourself, for sure.

 

[effowe]

Originally posted by: kranky
Yes, they can live like they want. But if they are dishonest, I choose not to be their friend. There's no way I want to be a close friend to someone while knowing I can't give them a key to my house in an emergency because they might (probably would) steal from me.

I'd actually have more respect for someone who stole and said, "I know it's wrong, but I don't care." The whole rationalization that it really doesn't matter is the same line of thinking they will use to steal from friends or anyone else. People who steal are just unprincipled and they will steal from anyone if they want something. There's always a way to rationalize it so they can feel better about it.

The reason I say it's their business is because I have a friend who is a reformed thief. He stole from stores all the time and was very good at it. I know for a fact that he would never steal from a friend, and he didn't. I still trusted him then as I do today. I have a much larger problem with liars, who I can't trust further than I can throw them. I had a friend who was a chronic liar and it ruined our friendship because I couldn't trust anything that was coming out of his mouth.

 

[archcommus]

Originally posted by: radioouman
This is about a girl that you like... I had a girl that I liked in college that did it too sometimes. I just made sure that she didn't do that around me.

Did you mean "IF this is about a girl that you like..." ? Because it's not. This is a good friend of mine of about 5 years. Recently we've gone in slightly different directions, but I did not think our basic principles were this different.

 

[SlickSnake]

Originally posted by: effowe

Originally posted by: kranky
Yes, they can live like they want. But if they are dishonest, I choose not to be their friend. There's no way I want to be a close friend to someone while knowing I can't give them a key to my house in an emergency because they might (probably would) steal from me.

I'd actually have more respect for someone who stole and said, "I know it's wrong, but I don't care." The whole rationalization that it really doesn't matter is the same line of thinking they will use to steal from friends or anyone else. People who steal are just unprincipled and they will steal from anyone if they want something. There's always a way to rationalize it so they can feel better about it.

The reason I say it's their business is because I have a friend who is a reformed thief. He stole from stores all the time and was very good at it. I know for a fact that he would never steal from a friend, and he didn't. I still trusted him then as I do today. I have a much larger problem with liars, who I can't trust further than I can throw them. I had a friend who was a chronic liar and it ruined our friendship because I couldn't trust anything that was coming out of his mouth.

Yea, the 2 faced liars are worse than a thief, IMO. Much easier to like someone who tells the truth and steals, than lies constantly and is materialy "honest" as it were.

Just give him a fat shopping list and then offer him 25% of the value. Win-win!

Also make it clear you won't be bailing him out of jail, LOL.

 

[kalrith]

Originally posted by: effowe
So why doesn't this logic apply to software / music pirates? Sure, intellectual property is different than physical property, but downloading something for free that you could otherwise buy is stealing isn't it? Would you all feel the same about your friend if you found hundreds of gigs of pirated software on their computer? I don't see how this is any different. They are free to live their lives like they want, and if they get caught then that's their problem. I would have problems with them stealing from a store when I was with them, as I may be taken in by association, but if they are doing it on their own time then that's their business.

Some stealing is just more acceptable in society than others. Software and music piracy are two good examples. Lying on an insurance claim or taxes and getting away with it are two more. People don't seem to judge these as harshly as stealing an item from a physical store. It could possibly be because there is no physical aspect to the afore-mentioned forms of stealing.

Another possibility could be seeing the high prices of software like Windows and Office and government taxes as higher than they should be and compensating for that by stealing. However, one could make the same argument for cologne and perfume, which are marked up around 4000% above cost.

 

[soonerproud]

Originally posted by: archcommus
I found out a really good friend of mine of many years steals stuff from stores regularly. They do it often, anywhere they can, and with zero remorse or regret. This obviously really changes how I think about this person and the kind of individual they are. How should I let this bit of information affect my relationship with them? I know it doesn't directly affect me or our friendship, but I have trouble liking them knowing they can feel that way about something and act that way. What would you do? I've already tried expressing my disappointment with them - they just shrug it off.

A thief is a thief. This person would have no qualms stealing from you if they think they could get away with it. I don't care how likable the person is, this is not a relationship I would continue.