Ok, I know you guys like to pick on each other's OS's, so here's your chance. Clean jokes only, no flaming, just good jokes and good fun. Here's a few of my favorite windows jokes.
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If Bill Gates had a dime for every time a Windows box crashed......Oh, wait a minute, he already does.
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Windows is 32 bit extensions for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit os written for a 4 bit processor by a 2 bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition.
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If cars advanced in features and technology the way windows runs, they'd rarely start, always crash, and never work like you want them to. But you'd still buy one for an ungaudly amount of money and whine because the good cars (linux) are for jocks only and since they're free, they can't be any good.
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A local computer store had a sign out front that read "Help wanted. Tech needed." So a local computer geek applied and got the job. Taking him to the back the store manager set him down at one of the repair benches. He pointed to the huge table full of computers needing repaired and said, "I want you to fix every single computer in this store. It shouldn't be too hard of a task for someone of your skills." So the computer geek did what he was told and began working on each machine. The geek finished fixing every single machine in the store by evening and had cleared his bench. The next day a whole flood of new machines came into the store to be repaired and were of course finished by closing time. The next 3 days after that were the same. Come monday no more machines were coming in. This surprised the manager as normally there was at least half a dozen machines that came in daily. Instead, around 3pm a whole group of people came to the store and asked for additional computers for their houses. When the manager offered them the latest machines with windows installed on them, all the customers shook their heads. "We want the little penguin like we have on our other machines." The manager looked puzzled. After several minutes the manager discovered that all these people were the same ones who had just recently had their computers repaired at his shop. Curious what they were talking about he questioned the customers more and discovered that when they had taken their computers home they had found penguins on their machines. This really struck up his curiouslity, so he went in the back room of the store and questioned his brand new tech. "All these people out front have penguins on their machine and now they want more of them. What did you do to there machines?" The kid smiled. "I fixed them." The old man looked puzzled. "How?" The kid grinned wide. "I installed Linux on all of them!"
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Ok, you guys share your OS jokes.
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If Bill Gates had a dime for every time a Windows box crashed......Oh, wait a minute, he already does.
---------------
Windows is 32 bit extensions for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit os written for a 4 bit processor by a 2 bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition.
---------------
If cars advanced in features and technology the way windows runs, they'd rarely start, always crash, and never work like you want them to. But you'd still buy one for an ungaudly amount of money and whine because the good cars (linux) are for jocks only and since they're free, they can't be any good.
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A local computer store had a sign out front that read "Help wanted. Tech needed." So a local computer geek applied and got the job. Taking him to the back the store manager set him down at one of the repair benches. He pointed to the huge table full of computers needing repaired and said, "I want you to fix every single computer in this store. It shouldn't be too hard of a task for someone of your skills." So the computer geek did what he was told and began working on each machine. The geek finished fixing every single machine in the store by evening and had cleared his bench. The next day a whole flood of new machines came into the store to be repaired and were of course finished by closing time. The next 3 days after that were the same. Come monday no more machines were coming in. This surprised the manager as normally there was at least half a dozen machines that came in daily. Instead, around 3pm a whole group of people came to the store and asked for additional computers for their houses. When the manager offered them the latest machines with windows installed on them, all the customers shook their heads. "We want the little penguin like we have on our other machines." The manager looked puzzled. After several minutes the manager discovered that all these people were the same ones who had just recently had their computers repaired at his shop. Curious what they were talking about he questioned the customers more and discovered that when they had taken their computers home they had found penguins on their machines. This really struck up his curiouslity, so he went in the back room of the store and questioned his brand new tech. "All these people out front have penguins on their machine and now they want more of them. What did you do to there machines?" The kid smiled. "I fixed them." The old man looked puzzled. "How?" The kid grinned wide. "I installed Linux on all of them!"
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Ok, you guys share your OS jokes.
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