Ever wonder how many calories are in a baby?

[blackangst1]

Now we know. Per pound, humans are a poor diet. Sorry cannibals.

https://arstechnica.com/science/201...ibal-on-a-paleo-diet-human-flesh-is-just-meh/

Because archeological sites suggest that non-adults were also consumed, Cole then calculated calorie contents of male human infants, children, and teens, based on size. Eating an entire baby offers about 12,823 calories, he found. Sadly, he couldn’t estimate similar calorie contents for female hominins—he didn't find published chemical compositions for them. And, he noted, “the collection of primary data of this nature was outside the ethical (and legal) scope of this study.”

Using the male estimate, Cole could then roughly calculate the total calories consumed from skeletal muscle or whole bodies at nine different archeological sites that had evidence of cannibalism. For instance, in Gough’s Cave in England, bones dated around 14,700 years ago at the end of the ice age suggested that two adults, two teens, and an infant were eaten, possibly for nutritional reason. If diners ate the whole bodies, they would have had 519,559 calories total. If they just stuck with the skeletal muscle, they would have gotten 114,773 calories.

 

[SaltyNuts]

All the time brother, all the time. Terrible news.

 

[clamum]

This tool kid who used to skate at the Mormon Church in our hometown (dunno why we used to skate there, I guess just cause it was out of the way and had a flat surface), although he hardly skated in reality, spray painted or wrote on the sidewalk "Satan eats babies." ROFL... he was a tool but I still get a chuckle out of the statement even now.

 

[shortylickens]

Is this why I cant lose weight? Its impossible to burn half a million calories?

 

[cbrunny]

12,800 calories for an infant is pretty dense. How big is the baby? say... 10 pounds?

A pound of beef has 1134 calories in it (google). I guess that doesn't include bones. Hm.

maybe its not a lot. Still, if you spread it over 7 days, you'd be well fed.... but would also not have a baby any more. because you ate it.

 

[Pulsar]

Now what about clowns? I've always wondered, because when you eat them they taste a little funny.