Hi im trying to write a good intro for an essay for AP english (bah first essay!...i know it sucks)
Can you guys read it and tell me what i can do to improove it...i was told to have more analysis in some parts so i tryed to fix them, but i really dont know....if you think a part can use work, please lmk what i can do to make it better, thanks guys...
Essay Prompt:
1988: Choose a distinguished novel or play in which some of the most significant events are mental or psychological; for example, awakenings, discoveries, changes in consciousness. In a well-organized essay, describe how the author manages to give these internal events the sense of excitement, suspense, and climax usually associated with external action. Do not merely summarize the plot.
In Arthur Miller?s play ?Death of a Salesman,? Willy Lowman is an aging salesman who never tries to improve his present circumstances, but opts instead to flee from them, by recalling better times in the past when his life had fewer conflicts. Willy comes to realization that his life isn?t exactly what he planed; He uses evasion as a drug and puts himself in a false state of happiness letting him escape his problems, and as the story unfolds, the audience soon discovers the lethality of his drug.
Willy?s first dose of his drug, evasion, is when his son Biff returns home from out west. While discussing with his wife Linda, his disappointment in Biff, Willy is unable to cope with the reality of his son Biff?s few accomplishments. Willy resorts to evading his disappointments in Biff, and chooses to return, in his mind, to a more auspicious time when things were better for him and his family. Although remembering the ?good old days? is something perfectly normal to do, it is important that we don?t let those better memories shelter us from our current problems. Not acknowledging your current problems only sets you up for a bigger fall when all the problems finally catch to you. This bigger fall can be depression, self-abuse, and eventually suicide. However in the play, Willy?s refusal to acknowledge reality becomes so significant, that he honestly believes the past, and he lives his entire life through a false happiness never looking at the truth of his life.
As the play progresses, Willy becomes more addicted to his drugs: evasion and denial because they provide such an easy way out of his problems. The next time he heads to his safe haven of evasion, is during another conversation with his wife Linda. Willy is in low spirits and begins indulging in self-criticism; he moans that he cannot move ahead in life because people do not like him. He also complains that he talks too much and how he believes people laugh at him for being too fat. Willy is beginning to see some of life's truisms; "I know it when they walk in. They seem to laugh at me."(Pg. 23) This is something we all go through in life, everyone at one point or another is overly self-conscious about their appearance and lets it get to them. The truth is it really doesn?t matter as long as your own appearance pleases you; don?t worry about it pleasing others. By trying to see the reality in life for once, he depresses himself so awfully, that he re-enters his safe haven. Willy thinks of ?The Woman?, his mistress, he recalls a time when she reassures him of his great character and his good looks. When she accomplishes her task in his flashback, poof! ?The Woman? vanishes, and his flashback is over. Willy is left with false satisfaction, but in high hopes, and carries on with his day like the problem never surfaced. Once again his miracle drug, evasion, rescues him from dealing with the realities of life.
Willy goes to see his boss Howard his boss about getting a local job, but Howard ends up firing him that day. By losing his job, Willy is brought to an all time low; he has lost his job, the last thing that made him a man, a provider, but now he is nothing to his family. Willy needing an immense dose of his drug like never before thinks of the best day in his life, the day Biff played in the All Scholastic Championship Game. This was a point in life when Willy?s pride in his sons had swelled to an all time high. But suddenly Willy's swollen bubble of pride for his son is unexpectedly blew up in his face that same day when Biff forces him to see the reality of his shortcomings in life. The one proud memory Willy had of his sons is now in the scrap pile, the pressure climbs by the minute and Willy?s need for his drug is increased. Willy is hanging over the edge and he has no memories left to help him cope with his problems, Willy is hit hard as all of his problems have caught up to him. He is taken back to the most disheartening point in his life, when Biff finds out about ?The Woman?, and he finds out that Biff has flunked math. The audience has now been exposed to the very moment that had started Willy?s depression and led to his downward spiral. Since this point is now revealed, and there are no happy memories left for Willy to take refuge against, Willy no longer has anyone/anything to run to. With his last hit of ?the drug? used up, where else can he flee?
It is sad, yet ironic, that Willy?s drug of evasion never really ended up helping him; it only gave him a false sense of happiness until his problems re-surfaced, often worse than before. By running from your problems you only set yourself up for a bigger collapse when your problems finally catch up. This is exactly what happened with Willy Lowman, and in his case he couldn't handle the realities of life all at once, and in the end it literally killed him.
Can you guys read it and tell me what i can do to improove it...i was told to have more analysis in some parts so i tryed to fix them, but i really dont know....if you think a part can use work, please lmk what i can do to make it better, thanks guys...
Essay Prompt:
1988: Choose a distinguished novel or play in which some of the most significant events are mental or psychological; for example, awakenings, discoveries, changes in consciousness. In a well-organized essay, describe how the author manages to give these internal events the sense of excitement, suspense, and climax usually associated with external action. Do not merely summarize the plot.
In Arthur Miller?s play ?Death of a Salesman,? Willy Lowman is an aging salesman who never tries to improve his present circumstances, but opts instead to flee from them, by recalling better times in the past when his life had fewer conflicts. Willy comes to realization that his life isn?t exactly what he planed; He uses evasion as a drug and puts himself in a false state of happiness letting him escape his problems, and as the story unfolds, the audience soon discovers the lethality of his drug.
Willy?s first dose of his drug, evasion, is when his son Biff returns home from out west. While discussing with his wife Linda, his disappointment in Biff, Willy is unable to cope with the reality of his son Biff?s few accomplishments. Willy resorts to evading his disappointments in Biff, and chooses to return, in his mind, to a more auspicious time when things were better for him and his family. Although remembering the ?good old days? is something perfectly normal to do, it is important that we don?t let those better memories shelter us from our current problems. Not acknowledging your current problems only sets you up for a bigger fall when all the problems finally catch to you. This bigger fall can be depression, self-abuse, and eventually suicide. However in the play, Willy?s refusal to acknowledge reality becomes so significant, that he honestly believes the past, and he lives his entire life through a false happiness never looking at the truth of his life.
As the play progresses, Willy becomes more addicted to his drugs: evasion and denial because they provide such an easy way out of his problems. The next time he heads to his safe haven of evasion, is during another conversation with his wife Linda. Willy is in low spirits and begins indulging in self-criticism; he moans that he cannot move ahead in life because people do not like him. He also complains that he talks too much and how he believes people laugh at him for being too fat. Willy is beginning to see some of life's truisms; "I know it when they walk in. They seem to laugh at me."(Pg. 23) This is something we all go through in life, everyone at one point or another is overly self-conscious about their appearance and lets it get to them. The truth is it really doesn?t matter as long as your own appearance pleases you; don?t worry about it pleasing others. By trying to see the reality in life for once, he depresses himself so awfully, that he re-enters his safe haven. Willy thinks of ?The Woman?, his mistress, he recalls a time when she reassures him of his great character and his good looks. When she accomplishes her task in his flashback, poof! ?The Woman? vanishes, and his flashback is over. Willy is left with false satisfaction, but in high hopes, and carries on with his day like the problem never surfaced. Once again his miracle drug, evasion, rescues him from dealing with the realities of life.
Willy goes to see his boss Howard his boss about getting a local job, but Howard ends up firing him that day. By losing his job, Willy is brought to an all time low; he has lost his job, the last thing that made him a man, a provider, but now he is nothing to his family. Willy needing an immense dose of his drug like never before thinks of the best day in his life, the day Biff played in the All Scholastic Championship Game. This was a point in life when Willy?s pride in his sons had swelled to an all time high. But suddenly Willy's swollen bubble of pride for his son is unexpectedly blew up in his face that same day when Biff forces him to see the reality of his shortcomings in life. The one proud memory Willy had of his sons is now in the scrap pile, the pressure climbs by the minute and Willy?s need for his drug is increased. Willy is hanging over the edge and he has no memories left to help him cope with his problems, Willy is hit hard as all of his problems have caught up to him. He is taken back to the most disheartening point in his life, when Biff finds out about ?The Woman?, and he finds out that Biff has flunked math. The audience has now been exposed to the very moment that had started Willy?s depression and led to his downward spiral. Since this point is now revealed, and there are no happy memories left for Willy to take refuge against, Willy no longer has anyone/anything to run to. With his last hit of ?the drug? used up, where else can he flee?
It is sad, yet ironic, that Willy?s drug of evasion never really ended up helping him; it only gave him a false sense of happiness until his problems re-surfaced, often worse than before. By running from your problems you only set yourself up for a bigger collapse when your problems finally catch up. This is exactly what happened with Willy Lowman, and in his case he couldn't handle the realities of life all at once, and in the end it literally killed him.
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