Employers won't hire you if you have 'The Desperate Vibe'

SandEagle

Lifer
Aug 4, 2007
16,809
13
0
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/03/employers-wont-hire-the-u_n_791710.html


"When you show desperation in your face and your tone during an interview, management is going to pick up on that vibe. They're gonna feel it and see it and notice something's off," he told HuffPost. "It's like somebody who hasn't been on a date in a while -- they're awkward, and the other person's gonna be turned off. It's always better for a person to interview while they're employed."



seriously, f u. in these hard economic times, who wouldnt be desperate? any HR people use this logic here?
 

guyver01

Lifer
Sep 25, 2000
22,135
5
61
Would you trust this woman?

arianna_huffington.jpg


I know i wouldn't.
 

theevilsharpie

Platinum Member
Nov 2, 2009
2,322
14
81
any HR people use this logic here?

I don't know of anyone that refuses to hire because of a "desperate vibe." If anything, desperation can work in favor of a qualified job candidate, as they would be more likely to accept a lower salary than someone that is currently employed.
 

UberNeuman

Lifer
Nov 4, 1999
16,937
3,087
126
Frankly, if I'm hiring - I'm not looking for a life story. I want a person that can do the job I need them to do.

\as for the OP... this is nothing new; if you come off too desperate, you won't get the job...
 
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manimal

Lifer
Mar 30, 2007
13,559
8
0
Frankly, if I'm hiring - I'm not looking for a life story. I want a person that can do the job I need them to do.

\as for the OP... this is nothing new; if you come off too desperate, you won't get the job...

Well when I was looking to hire a salesperson we only looked at experienced and effective salesmen who all were already working. Employers are in the drivers seat with people with masters degrees working fast food/walmart. If I pick up more people next year when our side businesses pick up I will still look at employed people looking to move up vs the long term unemployed with a big hole in their resume.

Ask a person who has been a stay at home parent for 2-5 years how hard it is to find a good job in good times let alone right now.
 

UberNeuman

Lifer
Nov 4, 1999
16,937
3,087
126
Well when I was looking to hire a salesperson we only looked at experienced and effective salesmen who all were already working. Employers are in the drivers seat with people with masters degrees working fast food/walmart. If I pick up more people next year when our side businesses pick up I will still look at employed people looking to move up vs the long term unemployed with a big hole in their resume.

Ask a person who has been a stay at home parent for 2-5 years how hard it is to find a good job in good times let alone right now.

Well, sir - my post wasn't meant to be an absolute... there's always exceptions to the rule...
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
50,248
6,456
136
Frankly, if I'm hiring - I'm not looking for a life story. I want a person that can do the job I need them to do.

\as for the OP... this is nothing new; if you come off too desperate, you won't get the job...

The 3 magic rules for keeping a job:

1. Show up
2. Show up on time (even better!)
3. Do something (winnar!)

Having worked in a variety of jobs, it's really hard to find good people. And good people doesn't mean people who are the best at what they do. It means someone who will show up reliably and take care of the job you hired them to do. There are certain outliers like football players or big corporate CEO positions that involve a bit more politics, but for the most part those are the rules I've seen to be true. Tasks need to be done and positions need to be filled to accomplish those tasks, so you take what you can get. Sometimes it's a hirer's market (like now), sometimes not.

That's not to say that the article is totally bogus. If you show up and act desperate, that's obviously going to show to the hiring personel. Sometimes the business is in a position where they simply need a warm body in that particular slot and that's what the needs require, so they'll hire them. When I worked at a pizza restaurant, we hired a high school kid who came from a rich family, had no work ethic, was obviously there because his parents were forcing him to get a job, and had never mopped a day in his life - he actually didn't know how to mop - and he was nearly 18! But we needed someone pronto and he was the only applicant, so we hired him. We fulfilled our requirement and that was that (for the record, he was a terrible employee due to his behavior and habits - no attention to detail, showing up late, goofing off, etc. - but having some help was better than no help).

On the flip side, some people think that getting a job is as easy as falling off a log. I see people come in all the time at my current job with either no resume, no appointment, or both, and expect to be seen regardless of whether or not we are hiring. One guy the other day gave his life story to the secretary, who had nothing to do with hiring at all other than handing out applications. She couldn't get rid of him...he was there for nearly 25 minutes going on and on with excuse after excuse to someone who answered phones and filed paperwork. No clue. It's also rude to show up and just expect to be seen immediately, or show up early or at random times and expect to be seen. Even worse then they throw a fit about not being seen and give lines like "but I've driven over an hour, and I know it's the wrong day and the wrong time, but blah blah blah I'm the center of the universe."

It mostly boils down to two things: one, the company requirements of that position, and two, the person hiring them. If you come off as super needy, the first thing that says to the hiring team is that the person doesn't have their act together and might not make a good fit in the company because they're in a rough spot. Not that people who are "good" don't get in those situations, but if you're serious about getting a job, then you'll be canvassing the area's companies with your resume, going to multiple interviews a day, and presenting yourself properly instead of desperately. The hiring person's job is to find a good fit for the company, not just to give someone a job, so for them, it's more than a sympathy kind of thing - it's part of their job to do a good job hiring someone, the right someone. And that depends on the job requirements, the company needs, and, well, how the hiring person feels that day ;)

It makes me glad I'm not in management anymore :hmm:
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
50,248
6,456
136
Well when I was looking to hire a salesperson we only looked at experienced and effective salesmen who all were already working. Employers are in the drivers seat with people with masters degrees working fast food/walmart. If I pick up more people next year when our side businesses pick up I will still look at employed people looking to move up vs the long term unemployed with a big hole in their resume.

Yeah, but the difficult part of that is - why would a good salesperson be leaving their current job in the first place? Is it because of not enough money or opportunities for growth, or something else? Can they not get along with others well? Are they bad at their jobs? Are they going to be a pain once you bring them in? People who are excellent at exactly the job you're looking to hire and are a good fit in your company rarely come along, in my experience - even when it's an economy like today's, it's still difficult finding the right fit.

I think that's one of the biggest difficulties in hiring people - finding good people. Most good people already have jobs and are already working and aren't looking for a job - because they're good people!

One of the things that has always bugged me about business is hiring the person you like versus the person who can do the job. To me, coming to work and having a team that works together well is one of the best things there is. On the flip side, having a team that constantly has problems is one of the worst things there is. Most places I've worked at have teams that constantly have problems with each other, and that's because a company needs to hire the person who can get the job done, even if they don't mesh well with others.

I've left more than one job because I just got sick of dealing with a crappy working environment from that type of situation. But it's in the company's best interest to hire the person who is best going to move the company forward towards it's goals, and sometimes that means regular yelling matches, stupid office politics, etc. But as long as the job gets done, managers will keep those people because they are useful to the company. That drives me a little bonkers because you're torn between moving the company forward and keeping your workers sane. And if you're a manager who is not the president/owner of the company, then your job isn't to worry about the sanity of the workers, your job is to worry about meeting the company's goals. Ugh o_O
 

coloumb

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
4,069
0
81
Ask a person who has been a stay at home parent for 2-5 years how hard it is to find a good job in good times let alone right now.

My wife is in that situation. She took a year off to take care of the kids. She has a master's degree, previous executive managerial and engineering experience, and a long list of excellent references - but employers just aren't responding. In ye old days - you'd at least get a "Thank you for your resume'" and an interview - I guess they don't do that anymore.
 

Farang

Lifer
Jul 7, 2003
10,913
3
0
Seems like every job I've got was when I didn't give a fuck during the interview. I think a lot of it has to do with confidence and coming across as a peer to your interviewer, rather than a subordinate.

I've been a pathetically desperate candidate before, also, and for the interviewers it just doesn't come across as serious. What do you know about your own shortcomings that you are so desperate for my approval? This doesn't even have to be a conscious thought, its just something anyone would feel when someone is so nervous or desperate during something as simple as a discussion about a job opportunity.
 

Sukhoi

Elite Member
Dec 5, 1999
15,342
104
106
Seems like every job I've got was when I didn't give a fuck during the interview. I think a lot of it has to do with confidence and coming across as a peer to your interviewer, rather than a subordinate.

I've been a pathetically desperate candidate before, also, and for the interviewers it just doesn't come across as serious. What do you know about your own shortcomings that you are so desperate for my approval? This doesn't even have to be a conscious thought, its just something anyone would feel when someone is so nervous or desperate during something as simple as a discussion about a job opportunity.

Yeah I've noticed the same thing about the "don't give a fuck" interviews. It always seems like I don't get offers when I'm serious at an interview, and do get offers when I'm chatting like I'm with friends at a bar.
 

Dr. Zaus

Lifer
Oct 16, 2008
11,764
347
126
My wife is in that situation. She took a year off to take care of the kids. She has a master's degree, previous executive managerial and engineering experience, and a long list of excellent references - but employers just aren't responding. In ye old days - you'd at least get a "Thank you for your resume'" and an interview - I guess they don't do that anymore.

Protop: Lie on your resume! Make sure that there are no large blocks of unaccounted for time on your resume. Instead fill in something that simply isn't true but can't be traced.

Is it right? no. Is not interviewing your highly qualified wife because she had a child right? no!
 

ModerateRepZero

Golden Member
Jan 12, 2006
1,572
5
81
My wife is in that situation. She took a year off to take care of the kids. She has a master's degree, previous executive managerial and engineering experience, and a long list of excellent references - but employers just aren't responding. In ye old days - you'd at least get a "Thank you for your resume'" and an interview - I guess they don't do that anymore.
Protop: Lie on your resume! Make sure that there are no large blocks of unaccounted for time on your resume. Instead fill in something that simply isn't true but can't be traced.

Is it right? no. Is not interviewing your highly qualified wife because she had a child right? no!

Better Protip: figure out a way to honestly address the employment gaps. Does your wife volunteer? Has she been sharpening some of her skills (or better yet, picking up new ones)? Does she have a portfolio or some other example of her work / ability? References are nice, but actual evidence is better.
 

Bignate603

Lifer
Sep 5, 2000
13,897
1
0
Protop: Lie on your resume! Make sure that there are no large blocks of unaccounted for time on your resume. Instead fill in something that simply isn't true but can't be traced.

Is it right? no. Is not interviewing your highly qualified wife because she had a child right? no!

Yeah, that will never come back to bite you...
 

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,544
924
126
Frankly, if I'm hiring - I'm not looking for a life story. I want a person that can do the job I need them to do.

\as for the OP... this is nothing new; if you come off too desperate, you won't get the job...

Exactly, you never want to come off as desperate in an interview. Begging or pleading for a job is the last thing you want to do in an interview. Might as well show up in shorts, an old faded t-shirt, and flip flops.

I was hired recently by a company I didn't even really want to work for (because of the location-it is about 30 miles from my home) so I asked for a higher than normal salary and went in there with the attitude that I didn't really want the job and I got the offer right after the second interview and it was at the salary I asked for.

The commute sucks but I like the company, my boss is great, and I'm adding value to the organization while expanding my skills and experience...oh, and I'm working again. ;)
 

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,544
924
126
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/03/employers-wont-hire-the-u_n_791710.html

"When you show desperation in your face and your tone during an interview, management is going to pick up on that vibe. They're gonna feel it and see it and notice something's off," he told HuffPost. "It's like somebody who hasn't been on a date in a while -- they're awkward, and the other person's gonna be turned off. It's always better for a person to interview while they're employed."

seriously, f u. in these hard economic times, who wouldnt be desperate? any HR people use this logic here?

So, you want employers hiring based on who has the biggest sob story? :confused: Worst idea EVER!
 

Bignate603

Lifer
Sep 5, 2000
13,897
1
0
seriously, f u. in these hard economic times, who wouldnt be desperate? any HR people use this logic here?

For many jobs controlling your emotions and projecting a confident, controlled image even if you really need something is vital. If you're doing any sort of interaction with customers or suppliers at all the last thing your employer wants is for you to look desperate. If you can't do that in your own life why would your employer expect you to be able to do it for him?

Some employers even check credit scores for similar reasons. If you can't manage your own money they probably won't want you to manage theirs.

It's up to a company to figure out the criteria they want and they can do some odd things while remaining completely within their rights as an employer. I even know of one company that did things like take the person out to dinner just to see how they interacted outside of the formal interview. One guy that was up for a VP position got told to take a hike because he was rude to his own wife and the wait staff. The owner of the company decided that if the guy was verbally abusive in that situation he probably would be the same to the people that worked under him. It was a weird method but it did help weed out people.
 

fire400

Diamond Member
Nov 21, 2005
5,204
21
81
reverse psychology can apply, don't forget that.

depends on the situation.

define desperate: need it badly? it's fine.

add a context to desperate: frantic and panicking... um, maybe not.

however, if someone is desperate to enlist in the military: recruiters REALLY like boys and girls that are excited about serving their country!!!

we all know an employer will hire desperate illegal immigrants in American society on American soil, it's just bound to happen, it has happened before, and will continue to happen because they fill spots many do not want to take on.

so all in all, don't be so fvcken one sided and be realistic. positive desperate, sure. stupid desperate, it may just work as well. we are 'all' beggars of our own, and we will always sell ourselves in one way, shape or form.

why..., just the other day I was trying to sell a snowman some snow! (-LOL-)
 

Dr. Zaus

Lifer
Oct 16, 2008
11,764
347
126
Better Protip: figure out a way to honestly address the employment gaps. Does your wife volunteer? Has she been sharpening some of her skills (or better yet, picking up new ones)? Does she have a portfolio or some other example of her work / ability? References are nice, but actual evidence is better.

The above is, of course, what I was trying to say; in my own slightly flippant manner.
 

Moonbeam

Elite Member
Nov 24, 1999
74,173
6,622
126
People don't hire the needy because the folk doing the hiring are complete and total assholes.
 

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
126
This reminds me of a certain ATOT/PN poster who is an anti-government libertarian type who got laid off and decided to go on long term unemployment just to 'stick it to the government' and 'stick it to liberals' for giving Americans generous unemployment benefits. He's been unemployed almost a full year and this idiot thinks he can pick up a job whenever he wants. He literally believes that unemployment benefits creates no incentives to find work.

This moron is going to find out that there's a rude awakening when he tries to search for a job again. His unemployment gap is going to be enormous and employers are not going to be looking at him favorably.