Originally posted by: DestruyaUR
I used one of these once...
*sigh*
It was 1997. I had been collecting change for about 3 1/2 years, and happened across one of these cheap in an office supply store. Not a national chain store, but just a random "we got office sh*t" store. Thinking it would be easier to sort my massive amount of change with mechanical help, I bought it.
Later that night I took one of several "bags o' change" and began to sort it into the machine. Everything went fine for about the first thirty dollars, and then...
A horrific noise emanated from the machine. Like the screams of demons and seizing motors. Next thing I know, there was a blinding flash of light. I don't remember much after that, since I woke up in the hospital an indeterminate amount of time later. Turns out, the damned thing seized up and exploded, sending my hard-saved pocket change shooting out like shrapnel from an anti-personnel mine, eliminating all living things within a 50 yard circular radius. That goddamned thing killed my dog and guinea pig.
I returned home after the hospital discharged me a week later to find my house a vacant lot - as in nothing had ever been built there. Best I can figure is the thing was so evil, when it exploded it created a quantum singularity and swallowed my entire house up into some parallel dimension. I don't know why the spawn of Satan's accountant spared my life, but that assh*le is about 790 dollars richer, since he took my f'in change.
Sufficed to say, I count my change by hand now.