Don't want my baby's photos to be on facebook - am I being unfair?

[lxskllr]

My uncle sent emails of a picture of my niece, making fun of her for being dark! Of course she's dark, we're indian! I just don't have the patience to deal with b.s. like that.

That's weird. Is shade discrimination common with Indians like it is with other ethnic groups?

 

[slackerinabox]

That's weird. Is shade discrimination common with Indians like it is with other ethnic groups?

I've realized that I shouldn't speak for all indians based on my wacky family, but my mom's side has a ton of shade discriminators, and mixing races is a big no no as well. I remember my well meaning aunt telling my sister before she went to college - "you'll meet a lot of men in college but be sure to stay away from black men. We're already dark, your baby would be so dark that you'll be afraid to hold it!" Awful stuff and my way of dealing with it all is to not be very close to my extended family. But they try to drag me into their b.s. frequently.

 

[DivideBYZero]

 

[lxskllr]

I remember my well meaning aunt telling my sister before she went to college - "you'll meet a lot of men in college but be sure to stay away from black men. We're already dark, your baby would be so dark that you'll be afraid to hold it!"

Bwahahaha! :^D

Hard to take someone like that seriously, but it's funny to hear :^D

 

[slackerinabox]

Bwahahaha! :^D

Hard to take someone like that seriously, but it's funny to hear :^D

Yeap, especially since a good 2/3rd of my cousins have married outside of their race. Heck, I took it as a challenge when my parents told me that I could only date/marry indian christians.. First gf? JEW!

 

[Gooberlx2]

Am I being a stick in the mud?

You're certainly within your right, but yeah, a little stick in the mud-ish. You're not really going to be able to control what other people post, without coming off like a total dick and causing drama.

I agree though, that if people specifically want to see your pictures/albums of the kid, then smugmug is perfectly acceptable. I know Picasa can allow visiting unlisted albums if a person has the private URL. You could try something like that as well, if you don't want to deal with disseminating a username/password all the time.

 

[Perknose]

Oh what the hell... I just searched for my name in GIS.

I'm curious, what is GIS?

 

[Deeko]

I'm curious, what is GIS?

I presume Google Image Search.

 

[Perknose]

I presume Google Image Search.

Doh! I thought the answer was more esoteric, that he was referring to yet another handy-dandy "Social Networking Personal Info" finder site.

 

[vi edit]

Doh! I thought the answer was more esoteric, that he was referring to yet another handy-dandy "Social Networking Personal Info" finder site.

HAH! I was thinking "Geographic Information System"....and wondering WTF you'd find there about yourself. Maybe a picture of your house.

 

[highland145]

HAH! I was thinking "Geographic Information System"....and wondering WTF you'd find there about yourself. Maybe a picture of your house.

That was what I was thinking, too.

Google doesn't have me. Good.

 

[dpodblood]

Just out of curiosity I Google-image searched my own name and the only thing that came up was my Facenook profile picture, which is publicly viewable.

 

[mugs]

HAH! I was thinking "Geographic Information System"....and wondering WTF you'd find there about yourself. Maybe a picture of your house.

You know, I had to take a GIS class in college so the first few times I saw people use it as an acronym for Google Image Search it confused me too. I thought it had become widespread now, maybe not.

 

[M0RPH]

Just close your FB account and stop whining. If you really think people care about your baby so much and that they're gonna be 'leering' at it and 'judging' it, you have some issues. Social networking is not for you.

 

[CFP]

Just close your FB account and stop whining. If you really think people care about your baby so much and that they're gonna be 'leering' at it and 'judging' it, you have some issues. Social networking is not for you.

Partially, this.

As I said before, nobody cares about baby photos but direct family. Friends and relatives are just pretending, being polite. Of course, I've found it a fairly common thing that most new parents think their baby the second coming of the messiah or something.

 

[MovingTarget]

I support this. You aren't being unfair. Not everything is to be made public.

 

[guyver01]

(1) Do you live within driving distance of all your family? If not... how do you expect that uncle or cousin who lives 3,000 miles away to find out you have a baby?

(2) Don't want Uncle Pervert saying how "sexy" your 3 month old baby is.... don't friend them on facebook. It's that simple.

Some people would rather believe the entire world is out to get them, rather than control their own fate.

 

[Deeko]

(1) Do you live within driving distance of all your family? If not... how do you expect that uncle or cousin who lives 3,000 miles away to find out you have a baby?

(2) Don't want Uncle Pervert saying how "sexy" your 3 month old baby is.... don't friend them on facebook. It's that simple.

Some people would rather believe the entire world is out to get them, rather than control their own fate.

Haha you can't really be serious with your first point...can you?

And even if you are, err, post a status update on your wall if you feel its necessary to broadcast that information.

Sent from my SGH-T959 using Tapatalk

 

[guyver01]

Haha you can't really be serious with your first point...can you?

I am very serious.. he says he's not gonna share pictures...so ... how does he expect every family member to see his kid?

 

[ForumMaster]

i don't use facebook. they're evil.

 

[Deeko]

I am very serious.. he says he's not gonna share pictures...so ... how does he expect every family member to see his kid?

haha...alright.

1) He already addressed that in the OP, he said he has a password-protected account (not on Facebook) where he can share pictures if he so pleases.

2) This might be shocking to learn, but Facebook is actually only seven years old. Prior to 2004, family members actually did find out that other family members had kids, and even saw pictures!

Sure, without a constant flood of Facebook pictures it becomes harder to track every movement the kid has ever made....uh, but is that really necessary?

 

[slackerinabox]

(1) Do you live within driving distance of all your family? If not... how do you expect that uncle or cousin who lives 3,000 miles away to find out you have a baby?

(2) Don't want Uncle Pervert saying how "sexy" your 3 month old baby is.... don't friend them on facebook. It's that simple.

Some people would rather believe the entire world is out to get them, rather than control their own fate.

1) I figure my mom and mother-in-law will call every person from NYC to India (and beyond) seconds after birth. I'm also going to post pre-approved studio shots (you know, the sort you send in greeting cards) to facebook. That was my one compromise. I also have a password protected gallery set up that will even have a guest account with a vague password for easy sharing among relatives. As long as it's not being indexed by facebook or google I'm fine.

2) It's not that simple, if grandma tags baby in a photo she took and she's friend's with uncle pervert then uncle pervert will see it. Though my concern is less to do with hypothetical perverted uncles and more to do with broadcasting my life and helping advertisers build a marketing profile of our kid from day one. It's icky to me

 

[moshquerade]

did your wife already put the ultrasound pics on facebook?

 

[amddude]

I think you're overreacting. We're not talking about adding your kid to a dna database in the sky.

 

[slackerinabox]

did your wife already put the ultrasound pics on facebook?

Of course she did.. Hah.. I think she's a little bummed by not being able to post pictures on facebook but she could always link to photos hosted on smugmug (and selectively give out the pw)