Dolphins Evolve Opposable Thumbs!

[BDawg]

Oh, sh*t! says humanity

"I believe I speak for the entire human race when I say, 'Holy fvck,'" said Oceanographic Institute director Dr. James Aoki, noting that the dolphin has a cranial capacity 40 percent greater than that of humans. "That's it for us monkeys."

Aoki strongly urged humans, especially those living near the sea, to learn to communicate using a system of clicks and whistles in a frequency range of 4 to 150 kHz. He also encouraged humans to "start practicing their echolocation as soon as possible."

 

[VictorLazlo]

Gotta love the Onion.

 

[guyver01]

"They really seem to be making up for lost time with this thumb thing," said Dr. Jim Kuczaj, a University of California?San Diego biologist who has studied the seasonal behavior of dolphins for more than 30 years. "Last Friday, a crude seaweed-and-shell abacus washed up on the beach near Hilo, Hawaii. The next day, a far more sophisticated abacus, fashioned from some unknown material and capable of calculating equations involving numbers of up to 16 digits, washed up on the same beach. The day after that, the beach was littered with thousands of what turned out to be coral-silicate and kelp-based biomicrocircuitry."




HEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHE
good laugh

 

[Squisher]

No reports of seeing a monolith?

 

[BDawg]

Originally posted by: Squisher
No reports of seeing a monolith?

That would evolve the entire Cetecian order, not just dolphins. Remember, the scientists, while not espescially looking, have not seen an evolved killer whale. 🙂

Man, I would love to play that game again.