Dogs vs. Cats

[monk3y]

I found this on a site which said he got it from an e-mail so this is probably REALLY old.


The Dog's Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


The Cat's Diary

Day 983 of my captivity
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bast_rds!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ....

 

[GasX]

lol

 

[Vonkhan]

older than the internets ... but a lol nonetheless

 

[ViviTheMage]

hehe

 

[Zenmervolt]

Well, one repost deserves another: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0ffwDYo00Q

Yes, it's perfectly safe for work.

ZV

 

[Shawn]

That's pretty much on par with the intelligence level of each animal.

 

[monk3y]

Originally posted by: Shawn
That's pretty much on par with the intelligence level of each animal.

As true as that might be... dogs can actually perform jobs other than pest control. (herding, rescue, drug sniffing, guide)

 

[Abe Froman]

Originally posted by: monk3y

Originally posted by: Shawn
That's pretty much on par with the intelligence level of each animal.

As true as that might be... dogs can actually perform jobs other than pest control. (herding, rescue, drug sniffing, guide)

It's also about tn years old...

 

[Journer]

god i fucking hate cats

 

[Aharami]

haha. good one.

 

[rivan]

Originally posted by: Journer
god i fucking hate cats

It's ok. They hate you, too.

I think they're amusing - but I'm allergic to 'em and end up clawing at my eyes after any significant exposure. Dogs > cats.

 

[sdifox]

this predates forums... seen it on a bbs if I remember correctly... yes, back in the use your modem to call a bbs modem days.

 

[loup garou]

lol, a classic

 

[lokiju]

That was pretty good.

 

[middlehead]

Older than the internet, but still good :thumbsup:

 

[Srfrbum]

Cats 4Evar.

 

[BrokenVisage]

Yes it's old, but it will never change the fact that: Cats > Dogs

 

[DrawninwarD]

Cats are WIN.

Images: 1, 2, 3, 4. Ah classics.