used CCC and changed things and i thought it would work but when i go back to Windows Key + P it wouldn't trasnfer those settings over. Looks like CCC and Windows doens't share the same settings.
I'll confirm your experience is correct, and it's impossible to use software/driver settings to change which display is treated as the "first" when it comes to using the win+p shortcut.
My work-around has been to simply swap cables. My experience has been there is a hardware assignment here, and the hierarchy is assigned to the physical ports on the display. For you, it looks like the HDMI port has a higher priority than the DVI port. And my experience has been that the displayport has highest priority, if that helps. But hopefully both your displays have appropriate connectors so you can easily swap cables. Make sure the display you want to be number one will be plugged into the hardware port on the video card that has the higher priority than the display you want to be treated as secondary/number 2.
As for assigning which display is "primary" under the windows display settings, that is a separate issue that does not affect which display is first for the purposes of using the win+p shortcut to change multimonitor settings.
It's quite annoying that this cannot be changed and you need to resort to swapping cables around, but I just think the bug is a low priority item and not many people, if any, have reported it.