President Bush loses his Secret Service protection in ten years... just lettin' ya know.
Don't throw away last year's Uggs, save them for 2019. President Bush will lose his Secret Service detail in ten years. Thanks to a law passed in the 90s, any president elected after 1997 (Bush counts!) is protected at taxpayer expense for only ten years after their last term ends. It's a coincidence that the first president affected by this law is also the president with the lowest approval ratings since the United States started having presidents. How can Citizen Bush protect himself after the guys in wraparound glasses leave? We have five ideas for you, Mr. President!
Hide behind the mainstream media. If they can protect you from impeachment, they can protect you from assassination.
Travel with Dick Cheney, 24 hours a day. No one will shoot you if Cheney's in the line of fire. And just before Dick's about to die, lean over, smother him, then scream, "I'm finally free!" Appear on The View and tell the ladies about your eight years in captivity. Seriously, that's the only thing that would explain this presidency.
Pretend you are the star "W." If someone asks, "Are you President Bush," laugh and say, "I get that all the time." Then write, "Best, Josh Brolin," on their napkin.
Pretend you are your Dad. And move to (George H. W.) Bush Street, Kuwait City, Kuwait. They like you guys there!
If you are under attack, just stand there and hope their aim is bad. Technically, that's all the Secret Service does anyway.
From link above. :laugh: