Do you want me to post jokes?

[Specialist]

Remember the ones I posted yesterday?
I can post more!
If you want jokes please tell me!

 

[piku]

Hmm... do we want you to nef, do we want you to nef....

hmmm lemme think about it...





hehe j/k i dont care

 

[Specialist]

A British Man, a French man, and an American man are on a safari in Africa, and they are taken prisoner by a savage group of villagers. As they're being brought to the village, they are told that death was their only option, however, they each had their choice of the method they would use to kill themselves. The British man requested a pistol, and cried out "Long live the queen!" as he blew his brains out. The two others watched in horror as the savages flayed the man and made his skin into a canoe. The French man was next, and he requested a Saber. "Vive le France" was what he cried out as he disemboweled himself. The American guy watched again what they did with his body, as they made his skin into a canoe. The last guy, the American guy requested a fork in which to kill himself. As soon as it was handed to him, he started stabbing himself violently as he screamed "So much for your fvcking canoe!"

 

[yakko]

Even though your jokes are pretty funny I would be happier if you just sent me money.

 

[piku]

hehe I heard that one before. good stuff

 

[Specialist]

An old man was laying on his death bed. With only hours to live, he suddenly noticed the scent of chocolate chip
cookies coming from the kitchen. With his last bit of energy, the old man pulled himself out from his bed, across the floor to the stairs, and down the stairs to the kitchen.

There, the old man's wife was baking chocolate chip cookies. With his last ounce of energy, the old man reached for a cookie. His wife, however, quickly smacked him across the back of his hand, and exclaimed, "Leave them alone, they're for the funeral!"

 

[prodigy]

hehehe

 

[Specialist]

Mr. White, the biology professor, at a posh suburban girl's school, asked during class, "Miss Smith, would you name the organ in the human body, which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six times it's normal size, and define the conditions." Miss Smith gasped, then said snottily, "Mr. White, I don't think that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you that my parents will hear of this." With that, she sat down red-faced. Unperturbed, Mr. White called on Miss Jones, and asked the same question. Miss Jones, with complete composure replied, "The pupil of the eye, in dim light." "Correct," said Mr. White. "Now, Miss Smith, I have three things to say to you: one, you have not studied your lessons. Two, you have a dirty mind. And three, you will someday be faced with a dreadful disappointment."

 

[JeffreyLebowski]

Why are womens feet shorter than mens?
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So they can stand closer to the stove.

 

[Hamburgerpimp]

HAAAAAAAAAAA. Tell that one to the wife.