Do you feel you need to make more money than...

[LanceM]

I love it when she's making more. It lets me know that she'll be ok if something dreadful happened to me.

 

[xirtam]

I think it'd be weird if she made more, but it wouldn't bother me.

 

[BillyBatson]

it doesn't matter you are both partners

 

[radioouman]

i don't want her to rely on me, so I want to make less than she is making.

 

[redgtxdi]

The last couple years she made more. Then I contemplated buying the company I work for but didn't want to sink myself into that much debt, so I negotiated a much improved wage that was driven more by what I can do in the company.

It's kind of a nice compromise. I'll see about an extra $10K in bonuses this year & that'll put me a few thou a head of the wife.




Here's something else to consider along the same lines, however..............

OK, so whatever the wife makes..........if we "neutralize" the gender issue, is it "OK" for the wife to assume that she can start working part-time at some point in her life & you (the male) have to continue working full-time 'cuz..........well...........she's the wife????

(Yes, we've discussed this topic many times at home. I'm not against it, but I was a bit bothered that she immediately *assumed* that it was her liberty to take)

 

[Squisher]

My wife makes more than me, it doesn't bother me at all.

She is no more of an overbearing, authoritarian, hardass then she was when she was penniless.

 

[xSauronx]

i dont care
my ex seemed like it was a big deal on the weeks she was amazingly busy and made a little more than i did. she got really upset that she had made more than me...go figure.

my uncle was out of work for 6 years raising his daughter, as his wife was a Major or a Lt Colonel (i forget which) in the air force until about 2 years ago, at which point she retired and he started doing contract IT work or something for the army. never bothered him, in fact, he rather seemed to enjoy staying home and raising his daughter.

he also enjoys his work now, which is what he had been doing before he was a father.

 

[Stretchman]

For me it's all about the Ego. The money is key, and i'd rather be benevolent in my higher earnings than gracious with less.

 

[axnff]

Depending on how you look at it, she does: I'm salaried, and bring home a whole lot more than her (2.5x as much, this year, due to c-section and two surgeries), but she makes slightly more hourly (I count in lost overtime wages when comparing). I would love for her to make as much or more than me.

On the other hand, most women I've known use income as leverage within a marriage far more often than their husbands. Perhaps it's just the personalities of my friends/family and the women they marry, perhaps it's indicative of American Women in general; I'm in no position to postulate. But too often I've seen women with income equity use that equity to dictate how their money will be used (as per their wants, not needs).

In general, the people I know in the worst financial shape are those families with the women making equal or greater earning power. Though I would speculate that this is because neither party wants to relinquish control of "their" money, and no one person is responsible for the finances. It may be possible that when one person makes less (usually the woman, in our society), they are more willing to relinquish control of the finances to the person responsible for making the money in the first place.

In either case, my wife is so bad with finances that she could make 10x what I make and still trust (another important factor I didn't mention) me to successfully manage our money....

 

[joecool]

personally i'd be thrilled if my wife made more than i do - she could be the bread winner and i could stay home for a change!!!