I can tell you that at a big state university, once you enter you will be no one. No matter how smart or popular you were in high school, once you're in a crowd of 15,000, 20,000, 30,000 other people, you will be absolutely no one. When you walk on the streets or through campus you'll be hard pressed to find anyone you recognize or that recognizes you. Even in your class, which can comprise of a few hundred people, you probably won't know more than a handful of people, and there probably won't be many people who'll know who you are--including the professor. Once you enter the school, you're on your own, no one will hold your hand through it, and it's completely up to you to see how much you get out of it.
In a Liberal Arts school though, you likely will get personal attention, and you will definitely feel more in touch with everyone else, and actually feel a sense of belonging. You'll feel more like the school cares about your success, and hope that you get a good experience out of it.
So, in a sense of reality, a big state school will be much more like real life, and might prepare you better for it-IF you can get through it. At a Liberal Arts school you won't become as independent as you might be a state school, but your stress level through the four years will likely be lower..