Did you withhold a key negative aspect of your personality before marriage?

Toggle sidebar Toggle sidebar
nublikescake

nublikescake

Senior member
Jul 23, 2008
890
0
0
These questions are for the married folks of course or for those with some kind of legal status as a couple.

1) Did you withhold key downside(s)/blemishes of your personality from a significant other only to reveal it after tying the knot? Key personality downsides would be:

- A very bad habit (e.g. alcoholism)
- Criminal past (rape/murder/fraud)
- Very bad financial conditions
- Serious, chronic health issue
- Seriously dysfunctional family with significant issues
- Fake educational/vocational qualifications
- Faking nationality
- Past marriages
- Children from previous relationships

These are pretty serious aspects of your personality/character/history that could be real deal-breakers in any progressing relationship. Of course, the assumption here is that she/he was unable to figure it out and still doesn't know for whatever reason!


2) Why did you hide these key negative aspects of your personality?

Some reasons may include:

- You sincerely thought that it was a non-issue
- You were afraid that she/he would drop the whole relationship if she/he found out
- You were forced to by some external factor/person not to reveal it


3) If you did end up revealing it, what was the reaction?

- Disaster (aka separation or near-separation)
- Not a complete disaster but downhill ever since
- Visible/tangible reaction but better than you expected
- You were surprised at him/her accepting it without much reaction and moving on
- Complete non-issue (phew!)


4) You still haven't revealed it and have no problems as a result! In this case, would you:

- reveal it later on
- on your death bed :p
- never!


Would really like to see some honest answers.
 
TallBill

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
Yeah, I never told her that I have zero empathy for others. But I didn't realize it until it was too late. We're divorced.
 
BoomerD

BoomerD

No Lifer
Feb 26, 2006
66,405
14,799
146
We lived together for about 8 months before we got married. I think she knew all my faults by then...(hell, wimmenz manage to find some of out faults that we didn't even know existed!) :p
 
meltdown75

meltdown75

Lifer
Nov 17, 2004
37,548
7
81
i was going to answer this earlier. perhaps when it gets moved to the appropriate forum.
 
M

monk3y

Lifer
Jun 12, 2001
12,699
0
76
Was together with her for 8 years before we got married :/

Can't hide stuff for that long.
 
BoomerD

BoomerD

No Lifer
Feb 26, 2006
66,405
14,799
146
When people ask, my wife & I tell them we've been married for "almost 6 months."

When we decided to get married, all the old folks said, "It's just a sex thing...they won't last 6 months." :p

Next month, we've been married 35 years. :biggrin:
 
Dirigible

Dirigible

Diamond Member
Apr 26, 2006
5,961
32
91
I have no negative aspects to my personality. I am also very humble, among the many many positive aspects.
 
JEDI

JEDI

Lifer
Sep 25, 2001
29,391
2,738
126
TallBill said:
Yeah, I never told her that I have zero empathy for others. But I didn't realize it until it was too late. We're divorced.
Click to expand...

but isnt that a requirement for a good soldier?

or was that serial killer?
 
highland145

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,973
6,338
136
Let's see, alcoholic father, submissive mother, porn in the house, the youngest and most abused by older siblings because of the f-ed up family structure.......

Nope, I perfect. My wife is luuuuckey.

Well, except for that torturing small animals thing.
 
JulesMaximus

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,586
986
126
My wife and I lived together for 2 years before we were married. Any potential issues would have come to light during that time so, to answer your question, no, I did not withhold any aspects of my personality.
 
nublikescake

nublikescake

Senior member
Jul 23, 2008
890
0
0
TallBill said:
Yeah, I never told her that I have zero empathy for others. But I didn't realize it until it was too late. We're divorced.
Click to expand...

Well that really IS strange. Have you never had anyone show empathy to you? Never been sick and had someone look after you? Kinda hard to believe, TBH.
 
nublikescake

nublikescake

Senior member
Jul 23, 2008
890
0
0
JulesMaximus said:
My wife and I lived together for 2 years before we were married. Any potential issues would have come to light during that time so, to answer your question, no, I did not withhold any aspects of my personality.
Click to expand...

I can only imagine that it is probably next to impossible to hide something serious if you're living together.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

TRENDING THREADS

COMPANY
RESOURCES
FOLLOW
Top Bottom