Democratic Fisherman

[PimpJuice]

searched and didnt find anything......hopefully not a repost.

THE DEMOCRATIC FISHERMAN

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He lowered his altitude and spotted a woman in a boat below. He shouted to her, 'Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am.'

The woman consulted her portable GPS and replied, 'You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

He rolled his eyes and said, 'You must be a Democrat.'

'I am,' replied the woman. 'How did you know?'

'Well,' answered the balloonist, 'everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much hel p to me.'

The woman smiled and responded, 'You must be a Republican.'

'I am,' replied the balloonist. 'How did you know?'

'Well,' said the woman, 'you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it's my fault.'

 

[Lemon law]

True

 

[Sheik Yerbouti]

LOL! Nice, very good, I'll pass it on.

 

[Vette73]

Jesus, are you new to the internet?

Oh by the way check out Yahoo and Google, they make searching for things like this real easy.

And also stop spreading your spam e-mails.
Thanks

 

[jonks]

Found on another board, shockingly similar but with an unforeseen twist:

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost.
She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below.

She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me?
I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know
where I am."

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot
Air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet
above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude
and 100
degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude."

She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Republican."

"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is
technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your
information, and I'm
still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."

The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Democrat."

"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"

"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you're
going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot
air.
You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect
me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were
in before we met, but, somehow, now it is my fault!

 

[PimpJuice]

Originally posted by: Marlin1975
Jesus, are you new to the internet?

Oh by the way check out Yahoo and Google, they make searching for things like this real easy.

And also stop spreading your spam e-mails.
Thanks

so you're a lifer huh? I have only one response to your post.

'you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it's my fault.'

 

[heyheybooboo]

I was hitchhiking home from college one weekend and this truck pulled over.

I stuck my head in the window and the driver asked, "Are you a Republican?" and I said, "Well, no". He floored it and took off down the road slingin' gravel all over ther place.

A sedan pulled over soon after that to pick me up. They also asked if I was a Republican and when I answered "No" they took off down the road.

Shortly thereafter a Mercedes convertible - driven by this beautiful woman - pulled up. She, too, asked if I was a Republican. I looked at her - she was wearing a low-cut summer dress and had her hair up like Sarah Palin. I looked at her and said, "Yeah. You betcha!!" and she said hop in.

We took off and were riding down the road - with the wind whipping in and out of that convertible. I glanced over at the driver a few times and that breeze was forcing that sun dress up well past mid-thigh. Man. Was she hawt!

Finally - I couldn't take it anymore. I yelled, "Pull over. I've got to get out!" She looked over at me and asked why .... and I said:

"Lady. I've only been a Republican for 5 minutes and I already want to screw somebody."

 

[351Cleveland]

Originally posted by: PimpJuice

Originally posted by: Marlin1975
Jesus, are you new to the internet?

Oh by the way check out Yahoo and Google, they make searching for things like this real easy.

And also stop spreading your spam e-mails.
Thanks

so you're a lifer huh? I have only one response to your post.

'you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it's my fault.'

Winner.

 

[351Cleveland]

Originally posted by: heyheybooboo
I was hitchhiking home from college one weekend and this truck pulled over.

I stuck my head in the window and the driver asked, "Are you a Republican?" and I said, "Well, no". He floored it and took off down the road slingin' gravel all over ther place.

A sedan pulled over soon after that to pick me up. They also asked if I was a Republican and when I answered "No" they took off down the road.

Shortly thereafter a Mercedes convertible - driven by this beautiful woman - pulled up. She, too, asked if I was a Republican. I looked at her - she was wearing a low-cut summer dress and had her hair up like Sarah Palin. I looked at her and said, "Yeah. You betcha!!" and she said hop in.

We took off and were riding down the road - with the wind whipping in and out of that convertible. I glanced over at the driver a few times and that breeze was forcing that sun dress up well past mid-thigh. Man. Was she hawt!

Finally - I couldn't take it anymore. I yelled, "Pull over. I've got to get out!" She looked over at me and asked why .... and I said:

"Lady. I've only been a Republican for 5 minutes and I already want to screw somebody."

LOL. I like that one.