Dear *girlfriend*

[MichaelD]

Dear "Bambi" <--insert the bitch-label of your S.O.,

It would probably please you if instead of this letter, I enclosed an unlabeled DVD...and when you inserted it into your pink GMac Hello Kitty Powerbook, it was a video of me blowing my brains out with this here 12-ga shotgun.

Right, oh drafty-headed one? (<--she wouldn't understand that at all)

But sorry: You're not worth that at ALL. Yeah, you have made every vapid effort to control my little world; and unfortunately, I've let you...poonanny has a way of doing that to a man. I've let MY plans get put on the shelf in order to accomodate your wishes. Bitch. No more.

Listen up...I'm probably the last guy that will actually TALK to you instead of your titts:

a) I'm just pitiful for continuing to follow you around in spite of your repeated displays of sociopathic, bipolar, indifferent and flat out evil behaivor...most of it directed at me

b) I realize that I'm just freakin' sad for doing "a"

c) You are one sad little bitch. One day, you'll self destruct and hopefully get arrested and the pics will be on The Smoking Gun website...you selfish little fcktardbitchhignoramoushobaglpolsmoker.

d) And yeah, BTW: If it weren't for me covering for you that night (and bailing you out after your DUI) you would have been FIRED from your job, lost the visitation rights to YOUR KIDS (not mine) etc, I bought you breakfast, sobered you up, etc....and THIS is how you thank me?

I hope you get Miss Deaf Texased. :evil:

 

[S Freud]

Problems in the relationship?

 

[Crucial]

*yawn*

 

[Steve]

So, how do you really feel?

 

[notfred]

Ah women, they bring out the best in men.

 

[Nebor]

Originally posted by: Crucial
*yawn*

Agreed, I'd expect more from the Queen of Mean.

 

[MichaelD]

Bah.

It's not even close to my best rant and it wasn't intended to be.

It was one of those;

/slams phone down "Dammit! Bitch!!! DIAFFF!!! ARGH!!!"

Think I wil rant about this on AT!"


type things.

 

[bradruth]

Sounds like you were banging a real winner. :disgust:

 

[Acanthus]

welcome back MD

i missed these threads.

 

[moshquerade]

go out and get sh#tfaced and forget about sending her anything.

 

[MichaelD]

Originally posted by: bradruth
Sounds like you were banging a real winner. :disgust:

Dude; you know how it goes. Meet someone. It's all good. Crap surfaces...deal with it. It's still all good.

She gets comfy now that she knows she controls the poonanny supply...all her freakin' personalities and pre-existing probs come out of the woodwork and you just freak b/c she's psycho...and want to shoot her.

 

[bradruth]

Originally posted by: MichaelD

Originally posted by: bradruth
Sounds like you were banging a real winner. :disgust:

Dude; you know how it goes. Meet someone. It's all good. Crap surfaces...deal with it. It's still all good.

She gets comfy now that she knows she controls the poonanny supply...all her freakin' personalities and pre-existing probs come out of the woodwork and you just freak b/c she's psycho...and want to shoot her.

Yeah, I know. Time to vent a little rage (check!) and move on.

 

[thirdeye]

You're obviously not pissed off enough. If you were, you'd be able to at least fill a screen, maybe more. Keep working at it though.

 

[JLGatsby]

All aboard the crazy train.

 

[MrDudeMan]

Originally posted by: MichaelD

Originally posted by: bradruth
Sounds like you were banging a real winner. :disgust:

Dude; you know how it goes. Meet someone. It's all good. Crap surfaces...deal with it. It's still all good.

She gets comfy now that she knows she controls the poonanny supply...all her freakin' personalities and pre-existing probs come out of the woodwork and you just freak b/c she's psycho...and want to shoot her.

i must be a good judge of character because i can tell these things from the get-go. its pretty easy to tell if someone is psycho after a month or two IMO.

sorry about your problem. the letter was a good read. i dont think you used enough foul language though.

 

[EGGO]

Originally posted by: MichaelD
Dear "Bambi" <--insert the bitch-label of your S.O.,

It would probably please you if instead of this letter, I enclosed an unlabeled DVD...and when you inserted it into your pink GMac Hello Kitty Powerbook, it was a video of me blowing my brains out with this here 12-ga shotgun.

Right, oh drafty-headed one? (<--she wouldn't understand that at all)

But sorry: You're not worth that at ALL. Yeah, you have made every vapid effort to control my little world; and unfortunately, I've let you...poonanny has a way of doing that to a man. I've let MY plans get put on the shelf in order to accomodate your wishes. Bitch. No more.

Listen up...I'm probably the last guy that will actually TALK to you instead of your titts:

a) I'm just pitiful for continuing to follow you around in spite of your repeated displays of sociopathic, bipolar, indifferent and flat out evil behaivor...most of it directed at me

b) I realize that I'm just freakin' sad for doing "a"

c) You are one sad little bitch. One day, you'll self destruct and hopefully get arrested and the pics will be on The Smoking Gun website...you selfish little fcktardbitchhignoramoushobaglpolsmoker.

d) And yeah, BTW: If it weren't for me covering for you that night (and bailing you out after your DUI) you would have been FIRED from your job, lost the visitation rights to YOUR KIDS (not mine) etc, I bought you breakfast, sobered you up, etc....and THIS is how you thank me?

I hope you get Miss Deaf Texased. :evil:

Add: P.S. AND THE SEX WAS HORRIBLE.

 

[JonnyStarks]

Originally posted by: moshquerade
go out and get sh#tfaced and that'll give you the courage to send that

Fixed so's to make things more interesting for us.

 

[mrrman]

thats good MichaelD...loved it

 

[spidey07]

Originally posted by: MichaelD

Originally posted by: bradruth
Sounds like you were banging a real winner. :disgust:

Dude; you know how it goes. Meet someone. It's all good. Crap surfaces...deal with it. It's still all good.

She gets comfy now that she knows she controls the poonanny supply...all her freakin' personalities and pre-existing probs come out of the woodwork and you just freak b/c she's psycho...and want to shoot her.

Face it man. By our age all single women have serious issues/problems. If they aren't married by 30 then something is obviously wrong with them and if they are divorced there is a reason why.

Go find you a nice fresh mid-late 20s hotty, one that isn't damaged.

Seriously.

I did and couldn't be happier.

 

[Nebor]

Originally posted by: bradruth

Originally posted by: MichaelD

Originally posted by: bradruth
Sounds like you were banging a real winner. :disgust:

Dude; you know how it goes. Meet someone. It's all good. Crap surfaces...deal with it. It's still all good.

She gets comfy now that she knows she controls the poonanny supply...all her freakin' personalities and pre-existing probs come out of the woodwork and you just freak b/c she's psycho...and want to shoot her.

Yeah, I know. Time to vent a little rage (check!) and move on.

Michael really only does step one.

 

[Ronstang]

Michael....you are old and wise enough to not let a woman control the poonany. In order to establish your dominance and control early on in the relationship you simply need to tell her you are too tired for sex a few times....while the relationship is still fresh and good. Woman cannot stand to be told no because they think that is their trump card. Learn some restraint and go whack it. If you establish this early enough she will be the one always wondering.

 

[MichaelD]

Originally posted by: Ronstang
Michael....you are old and wise enough to not let a woman control the poonany. In order to establish your dominance and control early on in the relationship you simply need to tell her you are too tired for sex a few times....while the relationship is still fresh and good. Woman cannot stand to be told no because they think that is their trump card. Learn some restraint and go whack it. If you establish this early enough she will be the one always wondering.

Yes, Obi Wan...I know this...but the Pink Side of The Force is strong...and tempts me! Sometimes...I cannot resist!!!

Though she needs The Buttkicking of The Force...I cannot help myself sometimes...I am a disgrace to the Poonanny Jedi Ways....

 

[Ronstang]

Isn't this one like really young compared to you? If so that is the force making you pvssy stupid. Walk away. She will be the one crawling back. The harder you try with women the worse it gets. Turning your back on them is the best way to get what you want if you have the balls to do it. I never believed it until the first time I tried it....it is powerful. Now I simply choose not to fight about stupid crap and walk away, especially if they cry. Funny thing is they always come back.

 

[spidey07]

Originally posted by: Ronstang
Michael....you are old and wise enough to not let a woman control the poonany. In order to establish your dominance and control early on in the relationship you simply need to tell her you are too tired for sex a few times....while the relationship is still fresh and good. Woman cannot stand to be told no because they think that is their trump card. Learn some restraint and go whack it. If you establish this early enough she will be the one always wondering.

Words of wisdom right here.

I agree.

 

[Captante]

oh brother....