Dating again..at 40.

[Fathom4]

Now that the future ex Mrs. Fathom4 and I are moving to the divorce phase, I will probably be thinking about starting to date again in the next 6 months so and since it's been about 17 years.......


......what's it like out there now? Quite frankly the thought of dating again scares the hell out of me. So what's it like, especially for those of us that have hit 40 now?

What are the horror stories and should I consider becoming a Priest instead? (it could happen.)

 

[thebestMAX]

Just like high school only worse.

Just kidding, the 40s were probably my best years for dating. You and she are somewhat mature, the BS is less and everyday problems are understood.

If you deciede to become a priest, try one of those religions that DONT have celibacy as one of its vows.

 

[ratkil]

I'm going through the same phase, though I am in my 30's. I actually like the internet personals, if you can get over the stigma attatched to them, it is a way to meet people you would not normally run into. I don't care what anyone says, if you are not into the bar scene in today's busy society it is just too hard to just meet people, especially if you take out the time you are devoting to your kids and most other single people your age are devoting to theirs.

If all else fails, go to the bar, look for a woman with large breasts, then bring an empty coke can up and ask if you can get the $4 discount on the "body part amusement ride".......sorry couldnt' resist that comment

 

[unxpurg8d]

ROFL ratkil...dammit, it never occurred to me - I could've recycled the cans and made a fortune.


Hate to agree with ratkil after that but he's right...the internet's a good way to meet women who don't hang out in bars (any more... hey, I finished the coke can garage ) because they're too busy, too shy, too realistic, etc.

 

[qacwac]

If you have high standards (besides physical) then you are in for a tough time.

But that's just the words from a 20 year old.

 

[Fathom4]

Damn ratkil. I just spit Diet Coke all over my laptop! LOL





<< If you deciede to become a priest, try one of those religions that DONT have celibacy as one of its vows >>

Well I've been practicing that for the last year, although not by choice mind you. &quot;Father Fathom&quot;?

I'm not into the bar scene at all so I'll need to find alternative ways to meet people. Never really gave the Internet much thought, may have to consider that.

Maybe I better start savin' those Coke cans. LOL

 

[ChrichtonsGirl]

I was finally divorced in August after a 13 month separation, following 11 years of marriage. I am scared as hell of the &quot;dating pool&quot;, I dipped a toe in recently and was pretty disgusted. In the last four months, I've met three guys, two of whom were married and declined to say so until after we met, and the other was a disgusting freak pervert. From now on, I'm getting hooked up by my pastor (partially kidding).

Good luck, Fathom. It's not easy, and it took me a long, long time before I even felt ready to date again (still not sure I'm there).

 

[unxpurg8d]

Hmmmm...Fathom and Chrichtonsgirl - Wisconsin and Michigan aren't THAT far apart....

 

[teknoid]

Ok... Lets see... I found myself divorced from a 17 marriage about 6 years ago. At the time I was 36. As I recall the whole dating thing was pretty scary. Being 40ish you probably remember a time when &quot;safe sex&quot; meant a bed with a padded headboard. Anyway... I dated around for about 6 months. Mostly ladies considerably younger than myself. Do you have any idea how tiring it is having to explain EVERYTHING???

December of 95 I happened across a lady that I had dated when I was in high school. Turns out she too was recently divorced. We started seeing quite a lot of one another (figuratively and literally ) Well to make a long boring story even longer and more boring... She moved in with me in May of 96 and we're both pretty happy these days.

The moral of this story... Hell, there's not one. Get out there and have fun. But be careful!

HMMM... Is that possible??? Fun and careful...

 

[ratkil]

<<Wisconsin and Michigan aren't THAT far apart>>

No, they aren't, unfortunately there is that stupid big lake between them....... Heh, heh that's for the comment I need to step out from behind my computer monitor.....

 

[unxpurg8d]

ratkil, so I'm geographically handicapped..it's not a crime - yet.


(Although I wouldn't be surprised to hear legislation to that effect's being enacted as I type...sigh.)

::Standing behind ratkil's monitor so there's NO chance in heck of him ever noticing and crossing my eyes, wiggling my fingers in my ears, and sticking my tongue out at him. ::



Fathom4, just don't make the mistake of going for flash over substance again. There are a lot of nice, interesting, family-oriented, fun women out there who get overlooked because they're not out &quot;collecting coke cans&quot;.

 

[ratkil]

<<::Standing behind ratkil's monitor so there's NO chance in heck of him ever noticing and crossing my eyes, wiggling my fingers in my ears, and sticking my tongue out at him. ::>>

Heh, heh, my monitors are on arms overhanging the desk sides, so I would only be able to see you from the waist down.....hmmmmmmmm is there a &quot;You must be this tall to ride&quot; sign?

<---- ducking and thinking it may be time to stop surfing and start working before getting in real trouble here.......

 

[abracadabra1]

oooof. how i know that feeling- dating at 40.
i'm 50 now and for a period of 4 months my wife left me when i was 42. tough stuff man, but we finally patched it up.

gl. i pee me pants when she told me btw.

 

[Fathom4]

I'm glad I'm hitting these slow periods now and again to get a good laugh out of you all.

Yes that is one big lake right there in the middle.

unxpurg8d
(Hmmmm, still wondering how you missed that lake)
Thanks, I thought I'd had substance before, maybe I'll be smarter next time but on the upside I have two beautiful daughters to thank her for.

I'm thinking I need to get more involved with Parish activities and volunteer for committees at the kids school just to get out of the house. It will be a while before I feel ready to date again and even longer before committing to anything longer lasting than a change of underwear. LOL

It looks like you answered my questions, you scared me even further. LOL

ChritonsGirl you're describing exaclty what I'm afraid of. Best of luck to you.